Who do we know with green hair? That doesn't exactly narrow it down.

I've often referred to this blog as a hedge against senility, but I thought I had just read this issue recently, with the Hulk saving a damsel-in-distress that's more afraid of him. (I may have been thinking of this one with the Defenders.) This time, the damsel in question has green hair...and it still took me a moment to recognize her! From 1972, The Incredible Hulk #150, "Cry Hulk! Cry Havok!" Written by Archie Goodwin, pencils by Herb Trimpe, inks by John Severin. You know, come to think of it, I may have read the Marvel Super-Heroes #99 reprint lately, that would explain that!

The Hulk's usual, and ongoing, fight against the army, goes a little differently than usual. First up, Hulk is smart enough to pick up a soldier's dropped gas mask, to protect himself from the "funny smoke that makes Hulk sleep!" Next, while Thunderbolt Ross is at least trying to not use lethal force, he gets called off mission, as "all Hulkbuster activities are to be suspended--pending Congressional hearing!" There's a brief bit of back-and-forth between a tenured senator and a first-term representative--why would they even be talking to each other, that's not how the House and Senate work, right? The senator is an anti-Hulk hawk, while the rep argues a lot of money has been wasted trying to waste the Hulk: there is probably a ton of story material in that. Government contractors trying to build bigger and bigger weapons for the Hulkbusters and that green: money, in that case. States fighting over Hulk-related FEMA cash. Hulk related budget pork and padding: "Um, yeah, the Hulk totally destroyed that bridge. It didn't just fall down by itself..." I don't think they went deep on that, but they could.

Major Talbot had been driving Betty around to try to get to Bruce, and lamenting that she would never love him as much as Banner. Talbot considers tattling about Jarella, but to his credit keeps quiet. Meanwhile, the Hulk takes off after a girl that reminds him of his microscopic love; a girl with green hair, on the run from a gang of bikers! But she's not overly concerned: she's Lorna Dane, Polaris! And she's there to see Alex Summers, Havok! Alex had bagged out of the X-Men, after nearly killing Iceman while fighting over Lorna. Lorna explains Iceman wasn't really hurt, and Alex should come back; but he wants no part of that; which makes her think he doesn't want her, either. Then the Hulk shows up to defend Lorna, forcing Havok to suit up again.

Hulk is confused, and thus angry, when he realizes Lorna wasn't Jarella, and thinks he's been tricked. In the ensuing fight, Hulk picks up a massive chunk of cliff-face, with Lorna on top of it: Havok is forced to gut-check, and zap the Hulk with a long, focused beam between the eyes, knocking him out! (He also uses "a force beam to counteract the pull of gravity!" which I'm not sure he ever would again...) As Alex and Lorna head back to the X-Men, Talbot and Betty find Bruce, who, barely conscious...calls out for Jarella! Awkward.

I like Lorna and Alex, but I swear every third story with them they're quitting, or have to be talked out of quitting, or are coming back after quitting. Seriously, count it out yourself, the numbers don't lie...