Monday, June 21, 2021

You know what we're talking about here, but I keep things more PG on the blog. Follow me on Twitter for swears and whatnot!

There was so much discussion last week on Twitter, over things Batman could or would not do (ahem!) and without getting into it, that's what headcanon is for, people. I don't think the corporate explanation was worded right, and it wasn't supposed to be "Batman doesn't" or "heroes don't," they just didn't want the inevitable kids watching the Harley Quinn cartoon to have a weird discussion with the parents regarding a character primarily used to sell merchandise. Although, at least a few people argued of course Batman does, because he's trained in everything, right? And what he doesn't know, Nightwing does, right--wait, we're talking about something else here! From 2000, Batman: Gotham Adventures #28, "Notes" Written by Scott Peterson, pencils by Tim Levins, inks by Terry Beatty.
Batman and Robin think they have Riddler's latest clues figured out, except there's music in the background neither can quite put their finger on. Tim suggests Nightwing maybe could identify it, and he comes in for the next round of riddles, after Batman has to escape a somewhat pedestrian deathtrap. Dick recognizes the music as the work of Jack West, reclusive singer for the Substitutes, but with unusual notes that could be clues. At the Riddler's next clue drop, he had announced an appearance by West, bringing a mob of fans to the scene, and Batman has to swipe the clue on CD from a young fan. That's the secret origin of somebody that goes on to steal a lot of music, he'll probably grow up to be Kid Napster or something.
Nightwing hits a wall in trying to puzzle out the incongruous portions of West's melody; but Batman encourages him, thinking he was on the right track. Working out the German notation of the musical notes, Nightwing believes Riddler is hiding out in Little Italy. On the way there as he explains, Nightwing assumed Batman had figured it all out already, but for a change, Bats had not. Riddler was hiding out at one of the Joker's old hideouts, which surprises Batman that the Joker would just let the Riddler use it. Well, Riddler's sure he would, if he knew about it...Riddler's thugs are not thrilled to hear about that, and surrender, rather than possibly face the Joker's wrath later. Riddler is furious, but then dumbstruck when Batman tells him they ignored his clues, following West's more inventive ones instead.
West is rescued by Nightwing, although he tells him he just wants to finish this bit first: he seemed to enjoy the challenge, and Nightwing may have to admit, he did too.

3 comments:

  1. And now I want to see a deleted scene of Bruce traveling the world, especially the famous romantic sections of it to learn cunnilingus. Dude MUST have several volumes of the Kama Sutra in the Bat-Library. HAS TO!
    I'm sure Dick (who's name becomes more and more appropriate with each new sexual conquests of his own) could teach Bruce a few tricks...which I'm sure Starfire probably taught HIM.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I feel like it's more of a 'heroes don't have sex, secret identities do' thing.


    I love that most of the Riddler stories they did in the DCAU comics (Batman Adventures Vol 2 excepted) were about Bats either ignoring or just not getting the riddles and lucking into the solution.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Can you blame him though. Why bother with the same old shit like that when he can have his expensive-ass computer do the work for him and be home in time to read the internet about why he supposedly doesn't eat *ussy. Bet you Alfred leaked that shit to the Gotham Enquirer or maybe a jilted & ex-lover like Viki Vale started that rumor and spread it like wildfire.

    ReplyDelete