Friday, January 12, 2024

"Evil scientists stole my love!" Well, they've stolen my heart, sure.

I'm not usually this organized, but apparently this issue hit the stands 24 years ago today! The series it was based upon was about a month away from cancellation itself, but still. From 2000, Avengers: United They Stand #5, "Taking Aim" Written by Ty Templeton, pencils by Derec Aucoin, inks by Walden Wong.
This was based on the short-lived Fox cartoon, with it's big three-less lineup and weird armor designs. The comic tie-in seems to figure, eh, you're reading this, you've probably read some other Avengers comics, you probably know the score. This issue, Hawkeye and Black Widow's lunch date is interrupted by "three-time loser" Whirlwind robbing a bank: "He mostly uses (his powers) to go to prison for a living." While he's taken down easily, the Widow is dismayed to recognize an electronics component in Whirlwind's suit, but Hawkeye knows it as well: from Advanced Idea Mechanics, your friends at A.I.M.! The Widow plans on looking into it, then disappears for two weeks. Hawkeye then receives a call from help, with the Widow doing Princess Leia in her call for help.
Team leader Ant-Man tells Hawkeye to slow his roll, as he wasn't sure they could trust her. That goes over about as well as contradicting Hawkeye ever goes, and he storms off to save her himself; but the Scarlet Witch, Vision, and Falcon opt to go with him. The Witch thinks the Black Widow was on the level, the Vision trusts the Witch, and Falcon doesn't believe it and thinks they need a level-headed type here. The four head to a secret A.I.M. base, and Templeton sneaks in a dig at Fox when the Vision hacks into the video feed:
("Can you get a clearer picture?" "Not safely." "Super! Do it." Typical Hawkeye.) Hawkeye is dismayed to see the Widow was there, then it gets worse when she kisses an unmasked A.I.M. guy. The Vision is then discovered, which seems to be according to Natasha's plan, as she hustles the A.I.M. guy out. Then, arrgh, the "Fast Lane" insert! Which Chris Giarrusso was already mocking, this very issue! Flip a few pages, and while the other Avengers fight A.I.M. soldiers, Hawkeye goes after Natasha, who was getting her husband Alexi out of A.I.M. and gases him with one of Hawkeye's arrows. Natasha explains, she had believed Alexi dead for years, but recognized his work in Whirlwind's component. While she's torn in her feelings about Hawkeye, she has to get her brainwashed husband to safety.
A.I.M. sets a self-destruct and flees, while the Avengers make it out, and Hawkeye tells the team the Widow was never there. The others push back on that a bit, but Hawkeye says if that was a mistake, it would be the last mistake he made about her. Not a bad issue; although, maybe not as good as that cover.

4 comments:

  1. Mr. Morbid12:56 PM

    Goddamn that nice burn tho. I always applaud clever people sneaking in clever digs at the establishment on the establishment’s dime.

    I certainly did watch this series when it aired and it wasn’t bad, but not including the main big 3 on this incarnation of the team basically meant the show was always going to be on borrowed time. While I give whoever was in charge props for being brave enough to attempt to do something fresh like that, maybe wait until after you know you’ll be getting a 2nd season to pull that.

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  2. I know I watched a few episodes of the cartoon. The idea of essentially a West Coast Avengers cartoon appeals to me, because I usually like those weird lineups. But man, those terrible armored costumes. I know Giarusso mocked Hawkeye's in particular at some point, where Clint switches to it because girls were swooning over Spidey in his symbiote costume, and Storm rightly mocks him for looking like an idiot.

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    1. Mr. Morbid12:27 PM

      You know what, now that you put it like that, I can definitely see this version of the team being the West Coast Avengers. Especially any team with Antman as their leader, no offense to Hank.

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  3. I think everyone in the cast except the Falcon and maybe the Vision were West Coasters at some point, and Hawkeye, Tigra and Wonder Man are part of the original 5 roster.

    Hank's just not cut out for leadership roles. Last thing that guy needs is additional pressure.

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