80-Page Thursdays: DC Cybernetic Summer #1!

Every so often it gets really hot up here, like to the point that it's probably hazardous to go biking out in it right when I get off work. Or, it's a good excuse to be lazy and read an 80-pager! From 2020, DC Cybernetic Summer #1, with stories by Corinna Bechko, Andrew Constant, Stephanie Phillips, Heath Corson, and more; art by Paul Pelletier, Nik Virella, Scott Koblish, Nicola Scott, and more. Cover by Dan Mora, although how Batman can look so sour while driving the freakin' Metal Men is a mystery. (This one wouldn't fit in the scanner, so the pics are extra janky today; but maybe that'll encourage you to find a copy!)

The opener with Batman, "The Limits of Control," doesn't hit the right notes for summer fun, as Bats points out, "There's no summer in space." He gets out the probably then-current Bat-armor out, to stop Brother Eye from reforming. "Fandom" is closer, as Wonder Woman teams up with Platinum, to stop the other Metal Men, who have been conglomerated into an anime-derived kaiju.

Next, in "Summer Camp" Red Tornado's vacation with his family is interrupted by JL calls and a lost alien; then the real fun: "The Boys of Summer" with Blue Beetle and Booster Gold! When the beach is too crowded, Booster suggests they travel back in time to a less-crowded day...which gets more crowded, since they have so much fun, in the future they keep going back to that day, despite poor Skeets repeated warnings and a visit from King Shark.

"Cybernetic Summer" is a Flash-race, with Barry vs. the Earth-44 Mercury Flash; but then we get the Legion of Super-Heroes, Superboy, and Robot R217, in "Summer Lovin'." Trying to capture an alien, Superboy tags in R217 to cover for him as Clark Kent, and the robot finds himself smitten with a local girl. (Her initials weren't LL; it'd never work out!)

"Out There" pits Midnighter and Apollo against Monsieur Mallah and the Brain; then Harley Quinn and her elderly cyborg pal Sy Borgman try to beat the heat at a water park in "Splish Splash Special."

"Summer Bummer" is a fun one: Robotman's pal Mike doesn't want him to spend the summer moping about, but human stuff isn't as much fun for him. Nor are robot activities super-fun for Mike, but maybe there's something they would both enjoy...? Finally, "Catfish Crisis" is a bit of silliness with Cyborg and Superman against...the Cyborg Superman; until from the multiverse a version of the three of them in one shows up...or does he? Read more!

"Welcome."

I finished this strip, before I bought Giant-Size Age of Apocalypse #1, the third of five one-shots with the now-mutant Ms. Marvel travelling back in time to various big X-events to fight what's left of Legion. (The David Haller persona, that used to rein the others in, was gone; leaving a power-hungry monster.) Legion even mentions, this is one place he maybe never saw, because he caused it by killing his dad Xavier. Forced into a truce, Ms. Marvel and Legion eventually find the X-Men, the few that are left, preparing to die: this was the night before their final battle with Apocalypse, which of course turns out differently here. (And not in a good way!) I'm not sure how Legion would know this, but he mentions that world was about to "die in hellfire," which may or may not be overdramatic. 

If memory serves, since I don't have it next to me: in 1995's X-Men: Omega, the humans bomb Apocalypse and his forces, which maybe wasn't necessary, since Magneto tears him in half. Which also maybe wasn't necessary, since doesn't Bishop use the M'kraan Crystal to fix the timeline? I don't recall, exactly how big a nuke the humans were dropping, though: a good-sized one to get Apocalypse, or a planet-killer like the end of Beneath the Planet of the Apes. We next see the Age in What If...? #81, which you could consider an alternate reality or just a continuation: Magneto saves his X-Men from the explosion, and his world goes on to face Galactus. (That one's interesting, but the AoA Night Thrasher and his brother get a lot of the page time!) Sometime also in '96, we get X-Man '96, where Nate returns to the AoA, but I don't think he sees any X-Men. There's a number of one-shots and such, then in 2005 for the tenth anniversary there's a 6-issue Age of Apocalypse mini-series. (The GCD says that's written by C. B. Cebulski, but it was under his pseudonym "Akira Yoshida.") Then, the AoA returns in 2011's Uncanny X-Force #11. 

Anyway, out of all of those, I'm not sure the continuity lines up smoothly anywhere.

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Yeesh, it only took four issues for Danny to go full-on hardened vet.

Also, I'm reading these out of order, so it's like picking up an issue of Sgt. Rock and instead of Bulldozer, Little Sure Shot, and Ice Cream Soldier; Rock was leading Hotfoot, Lefty, and Alamo Pete. Somewhere along the line, something bad had happened...From 1988, Bad Company #4, reprinting the titular serial from 1987 progs 2000 AD #509-510, written by Peter Milligan, pencils by Brett Ewins, inks by Jim McCarthy.  

On the planet Ararat, Bad Company was getting it on all sides, as the Krool's "zombie beat" was re-animating dead earth soldiers against them. (I'm sure it's just 90's techno; Grant Morrison established that ages ago!) Robot medic Wallbanger thinks it can block the frequency, but they needed equipment, so the rogue unit was forced to head for the remaining earth soldiers at Sector 8; which involves fighting through the insane Marshal Bonehead and the Skull Possee. (The extra 'e' is for...insane? That's how crazy they are!)

After a battle, their commandeered Krool transport breaks down again, near where Danny had buried his friend Malcolm, but he finds the grave empty. Mac tries to play it off as animals got the body, but Danny's pretty sure Malcolm was now a war zombie. Pointed-eared Thrax asks, why not just decapitate all the bodies before the zombie beat brings them back; but Wallbanger says that'd take about three months to get all the earther corpses...Arriving at Sector 8, the remaining regular forces are disorganized and leaderless; but also afraid of the "wild animals" of Bad Company, which Danny remembers had been his first impression of them as well, and now he was one of them.

While the Krool could have just rolled over Sector 8 now if they had known how bad off it was; reinforcements were coming: earth elite Lord Ireland, who would almost certainly try to kill Bad Company, since they knew the truth, that earth was dying. Sector 8 finds itself under siege by the Skull Possee, as the zombie beat starts; and Danny is as cool as the other side of your pillow, since all he sees is "a lot of soft skin to be burst or scorched or torn..." Damn, son.

Darn, I thought I had all of Bad Company on digital...I'm pretty sure Milligan is building up Danny as hard when in some ways he's still all marshmallow: he has far more human feelings than Kano or Thrax, who are more like robots than Wallbanger. Also this issue: more Peter Milligan, with the first two progs of "Freaks", then more street football in "The Mean Arena." "Freaks" has art by John Higgins, but the protagonist is an unlikeable, looks-obsessed cad, who gets sucked into another world of hideously ugly inhabitants--or, they're ugly to him, anyway. "The Mean Arena" starts to get rolling, as the Slayers lose another player, but per the rulebook they can ask for a volunteer from the crowd, and dear Grudd I wish the NFL would institute that immediately. (In the pre-season, that'd get viewership up!) The Slayers get a ringer, though: fabled American player Matt Tallon, long believed dead, steps in; but he has reasons of his own...(Written by Tom Tully, art by John Richardson.) Warning: if you dig up the next few issues of Bad Company, you might get to read all of "Freaks," but after this title ended, "The Mean Arena" continued in 2000 AD Showcase until that series ended, so you'd have to look overseas for the conclusion!

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Probably our last dive into Marvel's short-lived Frontier imprint here, as we previously saw Children of the Voyager and Dances with Demons, both of which would have been right at home at Vertigo. But today's book probably should've have been Heavy Metal, all the way! From 1993, Bloodseed #1, "Chapter One: Cold Blood" Script by Paul Neary, Liam Sharp, and Cam Smith; pencils by Liam Sharp, inks by Cam Smith.

All is not as it seems here, but a barbarian-type wakes up in a frozen wasteland. He doesn't remember much, except that his name was Lysander, and he had once been warrior-king of Elysium. Something has taken his memory, his kingdom, and his queen Ellissya away, but what? And how can he get them back? Sounds like time for a quest, but it's not a typical D&D fantasy setting: he finds a mysterious chamber of technology he doesn't understand, although he does get a mighty weapon...a really big wrench! From there he has an encounter with an anglerfish-like creature with a siren lure, then fights to save a telepathic pterodactyl? The pterodactyl is a friendly sort, who explains Lysander's power to heal himself and others through telekinesis (it worked to explain Superman's powers back then!) and asks him to give up his quest and come hang, since his people were going to hibernate soon, it was too damn cold. Lysander declines, but accepts some gifts: some clothes, and a "helmet of truth." The clothes include a cloak, and what appears to be a larger pelvis that he's wearing as a loincloth over his pelvis. Where form meets function, I guess?

Later, Lysander finds a sort of way station, filled with holographic guides and somewhat tawdry visions of Ellissya. Feeling sullied by that, he continues on, to a massive tower, guarded by a water creature, that is set on him by the hooded bad guy...who looks like Lysander, minus an arm! He has a little tirade, about who will be "the one true Bloodseed!"

Viewer discretion may be advised: there is way more nudity than usual in this one! They probably should've put that on the cover; it couldn't have hurt sales. And maybe even more in the second issue, where our hero meets another version of Ellissya, who seems to remember she had ruled Elysium, with him as her boy-toy consort! There are clues that they were all genetically-engineered and seeded on this world, but why...? We don't get the full picture, or the full series. The Frontier comics editorial page we mentioned before says this was going to be a four-issue mini, but may have fallen behind from the start: the two issues released were "book 1" but the rest never happened. An editorial page in one of the other Frontier books spins it as hey, cool art takes time; but this hit the stands at about the same time as the crash of the comic book market: there were just reams of books out there, with most of them probably cannibalizing their own market. The Bullpen Bulletins page this issue had a checklist, with 28 books coming out that week, and Bloodseed wasn't even on it! (Psychonauts #1 was!) Liam Sharp has done tons of stuff since, though: I thought he might've been pulled from this to his run on Incredible Hulk, but he might've done some Death's Head stuff in-between. Which I may also have grabbed, we'll see; and there was maybe one more Frontier book we'll see later. (I said no, Mortigan Goth! Although I do like that third cover...) Read more!

I have not one, but two Legends of the Dead Earth annuals next to me in the blog piles, both of which I don't think I had read before. This one falls under, I see they were trying to do something new, but I don't like it. From 1996, Superboy Annual #3, "Fathers and Suns" Written by Barbara Kesel, pencils by Anthony Williams, inks by Andy Lanning.

By now you know the premise of these annuals: in the far-flung future, as mankind spread out across the universe, earth was just a distant half-memory, but the legends and legacies of its heroic age lived on. This one starts a little closer to the beginning of that epoch, with a fanciful tale of mother earth sending its children to distant colonies, to fight boredom and bring back gold; in this case, the colony world named Aztlan. Which seems populated by miners playacting as "ancient Aztecs," but they start panicking when they lose contact with earth: they figure it was isolationists cutting them off, as opposed to a Great Disaster or such; but they weren't "raw-landers" and assumed when their machines eventually broke down they would be done for. But, they had an ace-in-the-hole they didn't know they had: Sanson, a metahuman, who had always kept his powers secret. He considers taking the mantle of a hero like Superman, but decides the colonists are going to need something bigger than a legend: a god. Making an elaborate costume, Sanson first appears to the people as Quetzalcoatl; telling them he would give them a Superman; then later Sanson pretends to have just got his powers, to inspire them to build an empire...which, to me, feels like he perhaps unintentionally enslaved them to a false religion.

Centuries later, the colonists had built themselves a pretty nice little society, although they were still ruled by the current Superman: a Superman would always choose a successor, a Superboy, who would eventually replace him. Today, Superman chose young punkass meta Quetzal for his Superboy, not just for his powers, but "...for a certain tame quality." Despite initially being wowed by the pomp and ceremony, Quetzal starts to notice things: his boss was kind of mean in training him; he meets a pretty girl, Chala, with powers that were "forbidden" for a girl; and this Superman was more than a little corrupt. After saving a small village, Superman also helps himself to the local girls, then savagely beats a priest for horning in on his protection racket. As Quetzal has more doubts, Superman warns him about making attachments, a veiled threat about Chala. (Not unlike the 90's Superboy, Quetzal's main characterization was "horny gloryhound.") On a flight to clear his head, Quetzal then meets Ral Ezhno, the previous Superman; who had been usurped by his successor, and was now protecting a small village overtaxed to keep the capitol in luxury.

Quetzal catches a slap from Superman upon his return, as the meta-games were coming up: the competetion was intended to show new powers for the glory of Quetzalcoatl and advancement of Aztlan, although they could get a bit bloody. Superboy wasn't competing in the early rounds, as Superman was keeping him in reserve "until the losers were weeded out." In a later heat, Superboy beats a local speedster, and proclaims himself the greatest...which Superman takes as a challenge, as planned. It was a set-up, and Quetzal had bit, but he makes a plan with Chala. He had powers seemingly like the 90's Superboy, but his "T.K. shield" was no match for Superman, and he catches a beating as Superman proclaims himself as Superman, Quetzalcoatl, and "your god." Also as planned, since Quetzal, Chala, and Ral use their powers together, to make an illusion of Quetzalcoatl and accuse Superman of heresy. Superman eventually figures it out, and attacks them; only to be incinerated by the real Quetzalcoatl! (Divine intervention, after we'd seen fakes twice; boo!)

In the aftermath, Quetzal resolves to stay Superman, until his two advisors Chala and Ral tell him it's time to change tags, and to serve his god and his people better than Superman had. Which I suppose he'd have to, he would know Quetzalcoatl was real. I would have preferred the heroes winning on their own; maybe Quetzalcoatl should've got top billing here. OK, I have to do a little searching here, and compare it to the list from the DC wiki. At least some of those are probably in my garage; although it may be easier to buy them again... Action Comics Annual #8 Missing? Adventures of Superman Annual #8 Missing? Aquaman Annual #2 Azrael Annual #2 Batman Annual #20 Batman: Legends of the Dark Knight Annual #6 Batman: Shadow of the Bat Annual #4 Missing: Catwoman Annual #3 Detective Comics Annual #9 Flash Annual #9 in a couple weeks! Green Lantern Annual #5 Missing? Guy Gardner Annual #2 Impulse Annual #1 Justice League America Annual #10 Legion of Super-Heroes Annual #7 Missing: Legionnaires Annual #3 Power of Shazam Annual #1 Robin Annual #5 Missing: Sovereign Seven Annual #2 Missing? Starman Annual #1 Superboy Annual #3 right here! Supergirl Annual #1 Missing? Superman Annual #8 Superman: The Man of Steel Annual #5 Missing: Wonder Woman Annual #5 Read more!

We saw the 2019 crossover War of the Realms a bit ago, and recently from the same dollar bins I managed to get the main six issues of this one: from 2020, Empyre #1-6, written by Al Ewing and Dan Slott, art by Valerio Schiti. I did get a couple of variant covers; I had to upload the above John Tyler Christopher action figure one! There were like 20 covers already scanned, I think they were still missing 20 for the first issue! The action figure covers are always neat, although I rather like the propaganda poster style ones.

I suppose it isn't that surprising anymore, but this series references a lot of continuity way older than the creators, and even older than me, Avengers #89 or further back! After centuries of warfare, the Kree and Skrull empires have unified, under figurehead Emperor Dorrek VIII, better known to readers as Young Avenger Hulkling. Although there are other factors in play, the Kree and Skrulls have united against a mutual foe, the Cotati. The plant aliens had usually been seen as peaceful, and the Avengers are briefly on their side at the start of this one, swayed by Sequoia (Quoi) and his dad, the Swordsman; from the Celestial Madonna storyline way back when. Iron Man disables the Kree and Skrull war fleet, just in time for Quoi's heel-turn: the guilt leaves Iron Man feeling especially betrayed, since he had seen Quoi as "the first Avengers baby." Tony mostly spends the rest of the series like Achilles sulking in his tent--there's a literary reference for you, although I probably got it from the Tick.  

Declaring himself the "Celestial Messiah," the Cotati attack all over earth--a ton of crossover books, I know I read the Savage Avengers and X-Men at the time, both Conan and Nightcrawler were involved!--but their main goal is getting their seeds into the vibranium-infused soil around the Great Mound in Wakanda. This sets up another siege ala Infinity War, but it still works. Swordsman is portrayed as having some rivalry with the Black Panther, and I couldn't tell you if they'd ever even interacted before: this green Swordsman may or may not have been anything of the original Jacques DeQuesne, I think even his corpse had been destroyed more than once. Mantis shows up, to try and rein in Quoi (alone, no Guardians, and I'd say her character has long been far removed from the old Avengers version) but the Swordsman had been pouring poison into Quoi's ear for too long (Shakespeare reference! I'm on fire today) and he was gung-ho to kill all humans...and Kree, Skrulls, animals, all of it. (He did offer to keep the Avengers in a garden, and had put some thought into how to arrange them!)

But, my favorite bit of this one...might be a spoiler, so if you were waiting to read this one, we'll put it after the break!

In the first issue, the Cotati seemingly help (She)-Hulk regain her control and diction, but that was a lie. They had killed Jen, and took over her body! It was already green, a Cotati taking it over wouldn't turn it more green, so it was the perfect vehicle for espionage. The Cotati-Jen kicks the stuffing out of Ben, who refuses to go down: the Fantastic Four had recently taken in refugees, a Kree kid and a Skrull one, and Ben was going to give them a better life if it killed him. There's also a bit where Hulkling gets replaced--I won't say by who, it's another good bit of continuity--and it takes his husband Wiccan to point out the switch, even though the new "Hulkling" is straight-up mustache-twirling evil all of a sudden.

I hope I'm not damning with faint praise, but if you can get this for a buck an issue, you absolutely should! 

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"Elsewhere."

We finally get to the Age of Apocalypse, with a very slightly redressed version of my usual alley set!

Even though he would have a long run in Exiles, Morph is a solid representative of the AoA. I've had that figure for years, and I think this is the first time we're seeing him? 

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