Thursday, June 05, 2014

"Ah! A hit! The way you make your living!"

Getting comics from the quarterbins (or dollar bins, or whatever) is a sliding-scale of quality: sometimes, you find books that are good for a quarter, but not something good enough that you'd pay full price for. And sometimes you find a treasure. Like today's book! From 2000, Hitman/Lobo: That Stupid Bastich! Written by Garth Ennis, art by Doug Mahnke.

I thought this issue actually came out after the series had ended, but it was still a couple issues from the end. The author's note on the opening says "Clearly, this story takes place before most of the cast was slaughtered." So, um, spoilers? Anyway, Lobo shows up at Noonan's Bar, and starts a fight with Tommy's pal Sixpack, and Tommy has to throw down with him. Hijinks ensue.

Hitman was set in Gotham City, but very rarely ran afoul of Batman--in fact, this Gotham was a lot more like New York and surprisingly infested with organized crime. So, it's not surprising when the mob goes after Tommy, who's barely a step ahead from Lobo. But he sees a way to kill two birds with one stone...

Tommy has Sixpack put his team back together, Section 8: "A caped drunk an' a superteam fulla the criminally insane." Together, they manage to knock out Lobo long enough for Bueno Excellente to, um, marry Lobo and videotape the whole thing. Tapes were made, and Tommy promises they've been sent to all sorts of parties. "The next time you're fighting Superman, don't be too surprised if he's laughin' his ass off." Pissed but unable to do anything about it, he takes off, as Tommy, Noonan, and Sixpack have a laugh about Sixpack pissing in the gas tank of Lobo's bike. (No spoilers, but you probably know what happened to Tommy, so I guess Superman probably did get that tape...)

I'm not a fan of Lobo, but I do enjoy the occasional story where he gets a bit of what's coming to him.

3 comments:

  1. God, I do love Hitman. Bueno indeed. The thought that there is a tape about Lobo floating around out there, delights the hell out of me.

    Do you suppose they all get together on the Justice League satellite and watch it and laugh themeselves sick?

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  2. Keith Giffin's JLI would've made comedic wet gold out of this scenario.

    Awesome. I also love shooting Lobo's eyes. You know it won't kill him, but at best distract him, at worst, piss him off.

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  3. How did I miss this the first time around? Gonna have to hunt it down at the next show.

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