Man, he had better not get clowned by Leap-Frog or something.

(Opens comic) Goddam--From 1982, Marvel Team-Up #121, "Look Before You Leap!" Written by J. M. DeMatteis, pencils by Kerry Gammill, inks by Mike Esposito.

Speed Demon returns, this time in the middle of a chance meeting and rekindled rivalry of Spider-Man and the Human Torch. Unfortunately, this also features the return of Leap-Frog, in the person of the original's son Eugene. After a career getting thumped by Daredevil, the old Leap-Frog had retired, served his time, and was trying to raise his son right but was seemingly haunted by his failures. Eugene has the bright idea of making his old suit "a powerful symbol for good!" but maybe should've followed up on it with, I don't know, five minutes of practice with those powered springs. After accidentally trashing a cop car, Leap-Frog does manage to beat Speed Demon, by sheer luck. By the way, this issue's cover has those weird pointing-hand caption boxes I associate with old issues of Flash, as well as a mysterious figure in silhouette that is way too slim to be Eugene. (It's not as bad as the time Marvel pulled that with Volstagg, but still.)

More interesting here is the Spidey/Torch relationship: not as acrimonius as they used to be, they're both probably closer friends than they would care to admit. To anyone. Ever. Read more!

"Sinister."

A pleasant surprise yesterday: found the new Marvel Legends Nighthawk! Then I was able to find the old Marvel Legends Hyperion! I thought I had set him aside for just this occasion, but nope! Hype was in the same bin he'd been in since his last strip in 2016. Their Squadron Sinister teammate Speed Demon--formerly the Whizzer, when they were together, Speed Demon's his post-group solo work--had somehow weaseled his way into Flash scenes.

I have an idea for their fourth member, possibly kinda-sorta based on the current continuity. Meanwhile, while I saw Living Laser, Citizen V, and quantum whatzit armor Cap yesterday; I didn't bite yet. Probably would've for Hercules, so I'll just have to keep an eye out.


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"Race of the Century!"

I don't think the current Hyperion was ever a teammate of Speed Demon, or even the Whizzer. But I think the Hyperion that appears first in the comics, along with Speed Demon as the Whizzer, and the Nighthawk that was in the Defenders for ever; were all part of the Squadron Sinister, which was more or less put together by the Grandmaster so he'd have a team to field against the Avengers. (Their fourth member was Dr. Spectrum, who has appeared a few times over the years, but not as much.) Later, it's revealed that the Grandmaster had taken inspiration from the other-dimensional Squadron Supreme...and not the Justice League of America, as you might have guessed. Man, Grandmaster didn't even change the names, but I suppose a cosmic gambling addict wouldn't care about trademarks.

Anyway, an Avenger like Hawkeye would probably point out that whether Squadron Supreme or Squadron Sinister, he's probably going to end up fighting them either way. I don't think Hyperion is usually the lout we portray him as here, but Speed Demon is probably a million times worse.

CLARK: This is Clark Kent, reporting live for WGBS News, on the scene...sigh...

CLARK: ...once again, with Hyperion.
HYPE: By the undying zombie gods of Argon, it's pronounced HYPERION!! Kent, you are the worst hype man, EVER.

CLARK: Um, I'm not a "hype man."
HYPE: Pfft. Obviously. Fortunately for the citizens of Metropolis, I can do your job and mine.
CLARK: ...what "job," is that, exactly? All I've ever seen you do is start riots and trash-talk this universe...

HYPE: Indeed! Because this universe has never seen a sporting event to rival tomorrow's contest!
CLARK: The Thing is going to box the Champion?
HYPE: What? No! Tomorrow, we settle the age-old question, who is faster, myself, the nigh-omnipotent HYPERION!

CLARK: Or the Flash?
HYPE: That slugard? Hardly! I'll be racing the searing speed of my teammate in the Squadron Supreme,
SPEED DEMON: SPEEEEEEED DEMON! Whoo!

HYPE: You've changed your name?
SD: Yeah, apparently "Whizzer" has a different connotation in this universe.
HYPE: No, it's the same. Still, Speed Demon's nice, I like it.
KENT: Now wait a minute! "Speed Demon" there is a known super-villain! He's a menace! And he's nowhere near as fast as the Flash!

SD: Ah, that may have been true before, but I've accessed the power your speedsters use--and I was far faster than them to begin with!
KENT: You mean, you've tapped into the Speed Force?

SD: Um, not that one.
KENT: Velocity 9?
SD: Not quite.
KENT: Meth?
SD: That's the one!
KENT: Of course.

HYPERION: Tomorrow, SPEED DEMON--
SD: Love it.
HYPE: --And I will race around the globe, to raise money for charity.
KENT: Well, I can't argue with that! What charities?

HYPE: I'm racing for my charity, HYPERION'S Punch-Buddies!
KENT: ...what?
HYPE: I raise money--by hitting! Your donations decide what I hit--and how hard!

KENT: Wait, why does your charity for hitting need money--you know what? Never mind. Speed Demon, what's your charity?
SD: The "Touched by a Demon" Foundation.

KENT: ...I already know I'm going to regret asking, but go ahead.
SD: It makes restitution to anyone I've inappropriately touched at super-speed!
HYPE: A noble cause!
KENT: Oh, for...now back to the studio!
Read more!