An off start to the week, not just because of the holiday; but because one of the few comics I grabbed this weekend was another copy of Superboy #197, which I had of course blogged but inexplicably messed up entering the issue number! So, instead we've got another book, and I had thought this would be just a one-shot and was quite surprised both features were continued: from 2006, Tales of the Unexpected #1, featuring "The Cold Hand of Vengeance!" Written by David Lapham, pencils by Eric Battle, inks by Prentis Rollins; and "Architecture & Mortality, Part One" Written by Brian Azzarello, art by Cliff Chiang. Cover by Mike Mignola!

This was the Crispus Allen era of the Spectre: the GCPD homicide detective, that had been shot in the back, then saddled with the ghostly avenger of God's wrath. Still a detective at heart, he invisibly watches some of his old crew investigate a murder scene; a slumlord left handcuffed to a boiler in his tenement's basement, then later stabbed. Working the clues, Crispus seems moderately frustrated with the mortal detectives' work: they might be a little shoddy, but for him this would be like yelling at the TV during an episode of Blues Clues when they don't immediately get the answer. Crispus is also worried about what will happen when he figures it out: namely, the Spectre would come out, and go absolutely medieval on the perp. Was it justice? Or a bit much? Also, I don't want to spoil it, but the Spectre's ironic punishment doesn't fit this time. But, the case wasn't over yet...

I'm not sure if Crispus is still the Spectre in current continuity; but the next story might be better known; probably because of the Cliff Chiang art: it's the start of Doctor Thirteen's best-known story, and I should probably get the collected Architecture & Mortality since there are a ton of guest-stars, including several I'm fairly sure they didn't really have the rights to, so shh. After a prelude with Anthro, the first boy on earth; and a later scene with the dying ghost Captain Fear, and an icky dream sequence; Dr. Thirteen and his daughter Traci head to the French Alps, to investigate cannibalism at a plane crash. That might not have been cannibalism, it might have been a yeti--no, no such thing, and it wouldn't be there anyway--instead, it's Andrew Bennett, of I, Vampire! Which, of course, Dr. Thirteen won't believe in either, so this'll be fun for him. Read more!

I grabbed this issue at the toy show, but didn't love it at first read. Will it improve looking at it here? Well, stranger things have happened, maybe. From 1979, World's Finest #257, cover by Jim Aparo.

"The Innocent Who Hated!" is a nice title, but this one feels like Denny O'Neil trying to inject some social consciousness into a Bob Haney-type story: a refugee scientist is working in the zoo, nursing a strange lizard creature back to health, when he's accosted by some goons who want to drag him back to his old country. Batman stops them, but the guy's lizard escapes, and flies to Metropolis and takes up with Maudy. She's what used to be called a 'bag lady' and more than a bit off; but she takes to the creature, naming it 'Fred' after her brother. Fred turns out to be pretty helpful, granting Maudy the ability to alter reality; which would be great if she just wanted a house or something: first, she causes a cop to go bouncing away from her, then tries out looking like a uptown model for a bit, before getting into an argument with a construction worker about there being too many too buildings and it was too crowded. (Superman saves the cop, but misses Maudy while she looks different.) Maudy is more than a little...what used to be called, "opinionated," and after another argument with a Chinese restaurant owner decides the problem is too many foreigners, so maybe they shouldn't let anybody else into Metropolis. As the bridges collapse and tunnels block, Batman barely makes it in himself, having been told that Fred might be telepathic and then leaping to the correct conclusion.

Superman does his best to mitigate the disaster, until Maudy starts turning anyone she considers foreign to stone, including him! Batman was alright by her, so he's not affected, but is maybe freaking out a bit. Eventually, Maudy seems to decide change them all and let God sort them out, turning all of Metropolis except her, Fred, and Batman into statues! Thinking quickly, as Maudy settles down for a nap in the park, Batman breaks into a costume store, makes himself over as a George Washington statue, and gives Maudy an after-school special speech about America was all about everyone working together. Maudy changes everyone back, and Superman grabs Fred and hustles him out of there, while Batman takes the crying Maudy away for help. It kinda feels like the World's Finest team just gave the business to an old lady, but she was kind of a jerk, so...The scientist thinks Fred was too dangerous and would need to be killed, but Batman wishes he was safe and back where he came from, and Fred disappears. Presumably back where he came from, and not to nothingness: there's no reason why Batman's wish would have precedence over the scientist's, his was first! (Written by Denny O'Neil, pencils by Dick Dillin, inks by Frank McLaughlin.)

Denny writes the next story as well, Black Lightning in "Death Ransom!" Confronting his archfoe Tobias Whale, Black Lightning is captured; which Tobias intends to put to good use. No, not powering his house: he blackmails his former organization, the 100, to either pay twenty million, or he would turn Lightning loose with all the information he had on the 100. Savvy plan, somewhat undermined by Tobias' moll Tabby, who offers the 100 his location, for the bargain price of 500 grand! Lightning and Tobias are forced to work together to escape, then have to find Tabby and bring down the 100...to be continued! (Written by Denny O'Neil, pencils by George Tuska, inks by Bob Smith.)

"Time Keeps on Killing" brings back old Green Arrow baddie the Clock King, who's back for revenge, and it feels somewhat justified? Diagnosed with only six months to live, he had turned to crime to try and leave some money behind for his sister. She had some ailment, referred to rather insensitively by Ollie; and Clock King had been willing to sacrifice himself to keep her out of a nursing home. But, either the diagnosis had been in error or he beat the disease, and while he ended up in jail, his sister had been sent to a state home and died there. CK tries to blow up a clock tower, Green Arrow, and himself, but fails. He would be played strictly for laughs in the Giffen/DeMatteis Justice League; I think they leave the dead sister out of his origin now. (Written by Paul Kupperberg, pencils by Jose Delbo, inks by Frank McLaughlin.)

"Attack of the In-and-Out Invaders" sounds mildly risqué, but it's Hawkman and Hawkgirl trying to help some birds affected by unexplained sonic waves, that leads to alien thieves robbing the Midway City Museum. The thieves are "in-and-out" in the sense that the Hawks can't touch them, seeming to pass through them like they were erasing them. Like a lot of their stories, the bad guy had seemingly found sophisticated alien technology, somewhere, and immediately decided to use it for robbery. (Written by Gerry Conway, pencils by Rich Buckler, inks by Romeo Tanghal.)

Finally, everyone in the world seems to be listless and tired--yeah, tell me something I don't know--as Captain Marvel faces "the Invincible Man!" (Written by E.Nelson Bridwell, pencils by Don Newton, inks by Kurt Schaffenberger.) The big green meanie explains, he was tapping directly into the soul of the universe, which made him as mighty as Captain Marvel; and "the spawn of Shazam!" couldn't cut off that power without killing everyone on earth! But, CM realizes, his foe seems to know a lot about him, which makes him think it was actually one of his old foes...and he's right! I probably would've enjoyed this story more, if the next issue blurb wasn't for "The Courtship of Captain Nazi!" I'm pretty sure he's up to no good there, but phrasing, man. I don't want to see Captain Nazi trying to get a date, I want to see the Marvels work him over with tire irons for 15 pages. Read more!

Sometimes when they say 'locals only' you maybe should listen.

Also this issue: a woman goes about becoming a b-girl the wrong way--wait, I think I mean something else. From 1975, House of Secrets #129. Cover by Luis Dominguez.

"Almost Human" is a spin on a fairly typical horror plot: the hidden village of mysterious tribesmen, who may have secrets unknown to modern man. In this case, it's a tribe of bee people, somehow evolved from insects: an entomologist thinks their royal jelly could be a cure for most diseases and aging, and is willing to sacrifice her party to get it if need be. She kills a guy to keep him from hurting one, then gets captured by the bee people, who give her exactly what she wanted, which doesn't turn out exactly as she expected. (Written by Jack Oleck, art by Franc Reyes.)

After some Sergio Aragones' shorts, we then get "The Lottery," which isn't Shirley Jackson's version but it's close. A businessman says goodbye to his beloved wife and kids before getting on the train for a business trip, but ends up on the wrong train and instead of Springfield (not that one...well, maybe) he gets stuck in small town Plumber's Junction. Stranded until the next train comes through, at least the town was having some kind of festival, complete with a lottery with a $50,000 prize! The man wants a ticket for that action, but is warned this was usually just for the locals...well, it'll probably be okay. Of course he wins, and the prize is legit, but it's going to his family, since the man is clonked on the head, and left trussed up in a cemetery for the local vampire! The locals feel kinda bad about it, but overall one victim a year was better than the vampire picking people off all willy-nilly and such, and the family was taken care of, so...They maybe should put some of that on the lottery tickets, in the fine print maybe. (Written by Michael Fleisher and Russell Carley, art by Ernie Chan.)

That page is pretty good, although I feel like you could write like a dozen of these that use it! All roads lead to the graveyard, I suppose. Read more!

"Collected."

Yay, the Squadron Supreme returns! To their old boss? We'll see why maybe later. Read more!

He's not called "Boomerang" because of the things he throws; it's more of a karma thing.

I just grabbed a reader copy of this one, and I'm not sure if I'd read it before, or if I'd just seen all of it online? In the best way. From 2013, Superior Foes of Spider-Man #1, written by Nick Spencer, art by Steve Lieber.

Pretty sure the Sinister Six here never really gets a sixth member, but this issue is mostly Boomerang's story, starting with a brief recap of his origin: a star baseball pitcher that got caught fixing games, that was then approached by the Secret Empire and kitted out with weapons. Fred's a lout and a jerk, but one with big dreams; like getting out of jail for one. It's a somewhat elaborate shell game that involves shorting Hammerhead on some diamonds and letting him beat up poor Shocker (who would be the butt monkey for most of the run) except it doesn't, Hammerhead was really the Chameleon, 'kickstarting' Boomerang's crew, although I'm not sure how either Chameleon or Boomerang expect that to work when there's not really a job or money for said crew after they've put them together...? Well, that's a later problem.

While not eat-a-baby evil, the Six are largely conscienceless jerks--well, as far as we know: Overdrive actually has dreams of joining the Avengers after his 'villain' phase; and the new Beetle is maybe just there to piss off her dad, who maybe should not be pissed off. Shocker's kind of alright; but this issue we see Speed Demon steal a little girl's dog and the Beetle rob a comic shop, with varying degrees of success. They are jerks!

I think I forgot this started during the Superior Spider-Man era, too. There's a jerk for you...Also, I think some time after this, they tried to give Fred a redemption arc in Amazing Spider-Man: didn't take! Still, big recommendation if you missed this; I gotta figure out if I have all of it.

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"Warning: Read Siege #4 before this book!" I keep telling you, you can't make me!

They tried to do the same thing for Sentry: Fallen Sun, too. Will I like this issue any more...or less? From 2010, the New Avengers: Finale #1, written by Brian Michael Bendis, pencils by Bryan Hitch and others, inks by Butch Guice, Andrew Currie, Mark Morales, and others.

I actually have read Siege, and off the top of my head, the only things I can recollect are a pep talk for the bad guys that Asgardians were creampuffs and Thor was like their Spider-Man, the only tough one; and Norman Osborn unmasked in his Iron Patriot suit and found to be wearing...like Green Goblin facepaint underneath? It's a striking visual that does not make a helluva lot of sense: he had been crazy before, sure, but portrayed as a savvy master-planner always at least two steps ahead of everyone, not a drooling nutbag. This would be the end of Norman's time as everyone's villain and send him back to just being Spidey's. Anyway, with Norman under arrest, a ton of villains captured, and oh yeah, I guess Asgard had fallen? But, the New Avengers had been wanted by the law for quite a stretch, and weren't really sure if they still were at this point. Still, they were holding a grudge against the Hood, and even if he had lost his powers (again! How many times has that happened?) they had no intention of letting him rebuild power; either his own or organizational. The Hood had escaped with Madame Masque, who takes him to her dad, Count Nefaria, in the hopes of getting his powers back. Or some powers. Whatever. (I had mistakenly thought Silvermane was Masque's father, or maybe wasn't going to let that get in the way of a joke!)

Weird, this would be two years before Bendis would shoehorn Count Nefaria into another attempt at a big finish, Moon Knight #12. I suppose he's needed here so this isn't just a cakewalk for Ms. (Captain) Marvel, but the Avengers bring in everyone; which feels like should spell doom for the Hood, since I can't see him not getting repeatedly shanked in prison. Steve Rogers is made "America's top cop," a title I don't miss. Their names cleared, and Luke Cage reunited with Jessica Jones and their kid, the team enjoys a rare walk in the sun. 

This was the end of Bendis's long time with the Avengers. which was usually more miss than hit for me; even as he still has the occasional decent character beat; like Nefaria badmouthing the Hood, asking what Whitney saw in him. But, and I could say this was of its time, but it's also petty and mean? The Avengers go out of their way to intimidate and torture the Hood's cousin to get info (lightly torture, if there's such a thing) and their takedown of the bad guys is a bit over the top: Nefaria boasts of being immortal, so they bring Wolverine in to stab him a bunch? Moreover, I should enjoy Hitch art more than I do; but neither the Ultimates nor the Authority have aged especially well for me. Which I'm pretty sure wasn't his fault, but here we are. There's also a sizeable stretch of the story set under red lights, for...reasons? Like the colorist got it on sale? And then a pin-up section-slash-series retrospective by various artists, if that does anything for you.

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"The Secret of Mockingbird"? What, like what she actually thought of Hawkeye's costume?

No, not that one, the Secret Six one--no, I keep telling you, not that Secret Six! Oh, let's just do this: from 1988, Action Comics #629. Cover by Dick Rockwell.

Captain Atom guests in the lead feature, with Green Lantern; as an alien having taken the form of 80's action-movie star "Randy Violent" dug a chunk out from underneath an office building for his ship or recharge-temple or whatever. (I'm pretty sure Randy Violent was referenced in the Question; it may have been a DC go-to like Big Belly Burgers.) While GL struggled to hold the building up until the fire department could get everyone out, Captain Atom tries to make peace with the alien, and fails miserably; deciding it was too dangerous to be left to its own devices and starts trying to kill it. Exhausted and his ring running out of charge, GL still tells Atom, the only way he'd get that alien, was over his dead body...! ("So Long Ago the Garden" Plot and script by James (Priest) Owsley, plot and pencils by M.D. "Doc" Bright, inks by Romeo Tanghal.)

Black Canary's last strip may have ended on a cliffhanger where she faced a flying figure with swords, and another with a hook...this month we find out Dinah just beat up the cast of a local production of Peter Pan. This was like six chapters in so I'm not caught up, but Dinah may have found the killer, if someone doesn't get her first. ("Knock 'em Dead, part 6" Written by Sharon Wright, pencils by Randy DuBurke, inks by Pablo Marcos.) Likewise, "Beginning of the End" was also well into the Secret Six serial, but finally reveals the identity of the original Mockingbird: the premise had been, he had put the espionage team together, but was also secretly a member.

After a Superman two-pager, there's part four of a Nightwing and Speedy serial, that appears to be all Speedy this month, and is set in Ireland. With his daughter Lian, Speedy meets a couple orphans, and their story is dark; involving terrorism, murder, and suicide. Speedy is reaching the kids, so of course the house gets firebombed on the last page. ("Rocks and Hard Places, chapter 4: New Friends, Old Enemies" Written by Cherie Wilkerson, art by Tom Mandrake.)

Finally, another chapter of Blackhawk, where after the death of Marcia, Jan beats the crap out of her CIA agent jerk brother; then sleeps with Nat. She doesn't seem thrilled about that later, but Jan checks his mail, and finds they've both been invited to Washington, by Harry S. Truman! ("Some Guys Can't Take No For an Answer" Written by Martin Pasko, pencils by Rick Burchett, inks by John Nyberg.) Read more!