Tuesday, August 06, 2019

Some Toyman, that Batman figure's got like twelve points of articulation, tops.


The Toyman that would get a DC Universe Classics figure (And an Alex Ross one!) appeared on TV's Super Friends yet had a very short tenure in the comics. This incarnation would be around longer, yet is not as fondly remembered, but he does deal Batman a surprising loss here! From 1998-1999, Batman/Toyman #1-4, written by Larry Hama, pencils by Anthony Williams, inks by Klaus Janson, Flint Henry, Sal Buscema, Aaron Sowd and Ray Kryssing.

I kind of see where they were going with this: each issue of this limited featured a different narrator. The first was Detective Bullock, who investigates a murder with one witness: Tyler, a young boy who had been deafened in a shoot-out that had killed his parents. His aunt had just been murdered, but the Toyman had been looking for him, for interfering with his plans for a computer game: namely, killing a ton of kids for playing it. Toyman's motivations seems to be a strong notion that kids should play with real toys instead of "electronic garbage!" More than that is hard to say, but he seems really crazy; particularly in the second issue that he narrates.

Toyman had hired himself some muscle: Stiletto. (EDIT: Man, it really looks like Stiletto should've punched a hole straight through Batman there, instead of a mere...three inches.) While she draws the line at killing kids, saying Toyman would have to do that himself; she does manage to stab Batman good in the third issue, the silent "What the Deaf Boy Saw." In the final chapter, Batman narrates as he tells Tyler how he lost his own parents in much the same way, while getting Tyler to stitch up his chest. Together they race to a video game tournament, where Toyman is making his final preparations. Stiletto again expresses misgivings towards hurting children, this time mentioning losing an eight-year-old brother in a drive-by shooting. Tyler notices this, but Batman tells him (Tyler having to read his lips) that while she may seem good compared to the Toyman, Stiletto was still a criminal. Toyman turns on his henchwoman, setting off explosives in her communications gear, and Batman has to save her from a fall. Toyman had set up the game so when a player died in it, their system would explode and kill them: I'm not sure about that plan, wouldn't the gamers take off after the first console explodes? (Virtual reality is invoked, even though Tyler is playing a relatively standard computer game.)

In the end, Toyman attempts to throw a Batman-shaped grenade into the crowd to cover his escape, but Stiletto knocks it away so Batman can throw it...at the roof? Toyman nearly falls, and Batman then has to catch him; with both saves tearing on his stitches. Meanwhile, Stiletto gets to Tyler, in more ways than one: she tells Batman that Tyler thought he would adopt him. Batman has to tell him (while still holding Toyman up) that he couldn't be a full-time parent; but Stiletto tells him he could be her little brother. And he accepts! The story ends with Batman futilely calling after Tyler, "...but of course, he can't hear me."

I don't think the post-Crisis Toyman went off the rails until he killed Cat Grant's son. That pretty much sucked the fun out of him going forward. Has there been a New 52 Toyman? Apparently, only in flashback, because that page space is needed for Mr. Oz or something. Oh, damnit, now I want to write a new Batman/Toyman: Batman tries to figure out why Toyman has been murdering 'vulture' venture capitalists--for jacking up the toy industry and sales! Even while being murdered with toys, they would still have no idea why they were dying...Although this is arguably a step too far, Batman also has to contend with anti-capitalist fans who think maybe Toyman's on to something. (He's not; Toyman would be capitalist as all get out. If he could make a ton of money selling toys, he would, but there's always some holdup, like lack of legal capital, safety laws, copyright, etc.)

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