Your Happenstance panel for today:

Another one from West Coast Avengers #55, written and drawn by John Byrne, inks by Paul Ryan. Wordy, but isn't this just nicer than Thor telling Iron Man he's going down and will take all the blame for this?

Just saying, is all. Sometimes words hurt, Thor. Read more!

Maybe the X-Men have a salary cap...

Ah, advance solicitations. Because why not get hyped up and/or completely depressed for something that won't be out for months? From Comic Book Resources Advance X-Solicitations for March 2009:

X-MEN: QUITTING TIME
Written by JAMES ASMUS
Penciled by TBD
Cover by BRANDON PETERSON
Since the move to San Francisco and after the events of X-Infernus, Nightcrawler realizes a hard truth—he has to quit the X-Men. Kurt has realized that the X-Men just don’t need him anymore. He hasn’t been operating at his highest levels and even the biggest strength he has—teleportation—has been made redundant by Pixie who can do it better and more efficiently. Don’t miss the departure of one of the most important characters in X-Men history.
32 PGS./One-Shot/Rated T+ …$3.99

My initial response? Craaaaaaap.

I can see why Nightcrawler might be frustrated, or even want to quit; but replacing him with a teenager? That seems prudent. But Kurt's teleportation wasn't meant to be mass-transit: his job on the team isn't to bus the whole team around, it's more a short, quick jab, to get in or out. Maybe he's tired of the Cyclops/Emma regime, but Scott has to be a terrible manager if the one semi-upbeat team member the X-Men have ever had wants out.

Sigh. Look, it's pretty obvious, right, but Nightcrawler's my favorite mainstream comics character and serves as adopted mascot around here--Sally's got Green Lantern('s butt), Mike Sterling's got Swamp Thing, and Chris Sims has, um, either a car battery or a face-punched polar bear. I'd call Deadpool too, but frankly, Deadpool gets love and doesn't need my support. In fact, Pool has another solicit for a special. But Nightcrawler, frankly, doesn't seem to get any attention or appreciation from the X-books. I haven't bought a regular one since, um, #499, since it's not like he's had a big role in most of the issues since.

And that's pretty much par for the course: even though Nightcrawler's a popular and well-known X-Man, he's almost never been the main focus of the X-books. To continue the salary cap joke, maybe Nightcrawler should look for a trade to another team or book. Maybe X-Factor, or please, Captain Britain and MI:6. Here's hoping, but I'm willing to bet "Quitting Time" is $3.99 worth of moping, self-pity, and overwrought goodbyes; until Kurt gets dragged back in. Maybe I should change the banner to Nightcrawler reading the want ads...

Hmm. Actually, I do have to change the banner here one of these days...

...but I didn't like the lighting on this one. Still, I might set up a new one later this week. Maybe. Read more!

A number of bloggers, myself included, took one look at Dark Reign's villain roundtable, and went "Cough! Acts of Vengeance! Cough!" There's some similarities, but that's not a fair comparison. Let's look a little.

For those who don't remember, or weren't reading comics around 1990, Acts of Vengeance was Marvel's big crossover event starting towards the end of 1989. You might not recognize it as a crossover, though: sure, there was the big (yet not very obtrusive, and I rather like the design) banner proclaiming it on the titles involved, but there wasn't a separate mini-series--no AoV: Frontline or AoV: X-Men. It ran in the regular books, but most of them weren't mandatory purchases for the story, either.

The basic plot was, a mysterious dark-haired man in a suit approaches a number of super-villains--the Mandarin, the Kingpin, Magneto, the Red Skull, Dr. Doom, and the Wizard--with teleportation doors, and a better meeting room than we've seen in Dark Reign so far, and a plan. If, for example, you're a B-list villain like the Controller, and you've been getting your ass handed to you by Iron Man for years, maybe you need to switch it up, and try taking out Captain America. Maybe Batroc can take Iron Man...

Actually, it was a better plan than it sounds there, and while there were some forgettable matches, like Iron Man versus long forgotten Power Man villain Chemistro; there were some great ones, like Daredevil against Ultron, Quasar versus the Absorbing Man, or the Fantastic Four against...Plantman, the Porcupine, and a bunch of other lame-o's. (That was Walt Simonson's first issues writing the book, and they are a ton of fun, even before he got going with the art!)

But, and this is going to seem dated and quaint now, the whole thing only ran for three months. (I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it was on time, too.) And it ended without setting up the next year's worth of stories, too, although the last issue, Avengers West Coast #55, still sets up the next storyline for that book, while the villain conspiracy starts to fall apart. For starters, in Captain America, Magneto asks the mysterious man if the Red Skull is the same one that was a Nazi that put him and his family in a concentration camp, and the mystery man says you betcha. That ends with Magneto burying the Skull in an underground cell (as opposed to giving him the dirt nap...) and Magneto seemingly wanders out of the conspiracy afterwards.

The Wizard is captured by the Avengers, and Doom is revealed to be a robot:

While the Wizard escapes, the mystery man is furious that he's probably led the Avengers back to their secret boardroom. Although Doom referred to him as "Lackey" and they treated him as such...even though they knew he could teleport, and masterminded this whole thing...the mystery man reveals himself to be Loki. Hey, without the big horned helmet, he was just a guy in a suit! The Kingpin decides he's out with that revelation, and sneaks off surprisingly well for a big fat guy.

(EDIT: I don't think I ever noticed before, but Thor is looking for the Kingpin, by name, there; so no wonder he bailed out!)

Thor is able to track the teleportation with his hammer, presumably because it was Asgardian magic as well; and he and a mess of Avengers arrive to kick ass. Loki reveals his secret base to be the Isle of Silence ("Or a perfect imitation!" Thor points out), where he was imprisoned after Avengers #1. Loki tries to take on the assembled heroes, and the villains bail out. On a later version--which I'm still looking for! It was a back-up in an Avengers annual, a postgame analysis with Cap, that revealed the Wizard was recaptured, and I think either the Mandarin or the Red Skull there at the time, was revealed as another robot, leaving the Wizard to lament, why didn't I think of that!

One more from this, since I want to say this panel is a tribute to something, but can't quite place it:

Thor takes most of the heavy lifting on this, imprisoning Loki...probably for about twenty minutes, sure, but it does give him a moment to reiterate while Loki and the villains may have tried to destroy them all, it's only strengthened the team and their resolve. Which probably sounds old-fashioned, since every crossover now has to end with the team a wreck or broken up or someone dead or crying or the bad guys in charge or some other damn thing that leads to another big ass crossover. And most of this issue is still taken up by two different storylines Byrne was building up for later, but he wasn't twisting your arm about it. Ahh, now I'm all pissed off.

Let's look at one more Act of Vengeance that you might not have expected:

Lincoln versus Booth! This time it's personal! From West Coast Avengers #55, "The Breaking Strain" Written and penciled by John Byrne, inks by Paul Ryan.

Incidentally, it is killing me that I don't have a Wizard action figure. He last had one in the 90's Fantastic Four cartoon line, and I'm pretty sure he was a total pegwarmer; but it would be nice to have one now, just to have sitting by the phone waiting for the call that's never going to come. I think the Wizard might have got in to Loki's conspiracy club, with the writers planning on him being the one to drop the ball in the end. After all, if you're handling the Iron Man book, you probably don't want the Mandarin to be the one to screw up and look like a jackass.

I don't have a Kingpin figure right now, either, now that I think about it, and the Loki I have doesn't look anything like the one in Norman's group. I'm ok with that, though... Read more!

Timing, part seven.

I haven't read 2000 AD or any of it's related titles in a dog's age, and the one's I have were older anyway; but it's still ongoing. I used to get the Fleetway/Quality reprints of Judge Dredd, but a nice reprint book had a great Rogue Trooper tale that introduced me to Gunnar, Bagman, and Helm. Oh, and Rogue too, I guess.

Quick setup: in science-fictiony wartorn future, vatgrown clones called GI's, for "Genetic Infantrymen," are the new face of war between rival factions the Norts and the Southers. (I had to look it up, Rogue was a Souther.) Betrayed by the Traitor General, who presumably wasn't called that before that incident, Rogue is the last surviving GI; but three of his squadmates are "saved" to biochips, so they could be put in new bodies someday. (Presumably, this was less for humanitarian reasons, than as a cost-cutting timesaver to training a new trooper.) So Rogue's fighting the traditional one-man war, just backed up by his talking hat, gun, and backpack; who actually are helpful and entertaining.

Most of the time: the story I remember begins with an exhausted Rogue trudging through some godforsaken no-man's land, while Helm, Gunnar, and Bagman argue. Fed up, Rogue tells them to can it; but Bagman counters with a little story about how much he needs them: his memory temporarily wiped out by a gas attack, his disembodied friends guide him to safety. Rogue almost buys it, except in Bagman's story, the three don't argue once. Helm and Gunnar immediately snipe on Bagman for dropping the ball there, and Rogue decides to take a little walk without them. A fun little eight-page number, that tells you everything you really need to know about the characters and their setting.

I preferred Rogue's comic to Strontium Dog's, but Johnny Alpha was both lucky enough to get his own action figure (unlike Rogue) and Shaun of the Dead's Simon Pegg played SD in a couple audio plays. In SD's future, mutants are treated quite as badly as in Bishop's: they aren't rounded up and put in concentration camps, but they do live in ghettos and the only job for most of them is Strontium Dog, a sort of bounty hunter. The comic was actually a little more unusual when it started--there's an early mission where Johnny and his partner Wulf the viking are sent back to capture Hitler--but I think it mostly settled in to sci-fi western adventure.

If I'm not mistaken, Johnny's currently dead, although he and the also-deceased Wulf made an appearance in Judge Dredd a few years back, through the magic of time-travel. (For those of you not familiar with Dredd, mutants aren't welcome in Mega-City One either...) I also gather killing Johnny off is considered a mistake, and that a revival will probably happen sometime.

"Timing" continues on Wednesday, and later this afternoon: Acts of Vengeance lasted a little over three months, didn't have it's own or any subsidary mini-series, and didn't set up the next year's worth of storylines: would it even be called a crossover today?

Read more!

Coincidentally, "Prescription: Violence!" was the original proposed title for General Hospital and E.R.

(Click to enlarge this one, it loaded in funny!)


(Warning! Spoilers and snark for Secret Invasion and Avengers #139 ahead! Avengers #139 written by Steve Englehart, art by George Tuska and Vince Colletta.)



We've seen Iron Man and Captain America at each other's throats here before, and Thor and Iron Man haven't been on speaking terms for several years now, but what about Hank Pym? Tony appears to be well on his way to becoming the scapegoat for Secret Invasion, probably Civil War, definitely Cap's death, maybe House of M, and the subprime lending crisis. Even though Thor apparently "killed" Jan, Hank could pretty easily end up blaming Tony. Why the hell not?

So, here's a quick look at Hank taking out some frustration on Iron Man. The Wasp was nearly blown to bits by the Toad...geez, Jan. You're making the Invisible Girl look like a UFC cage fighter. To be fair, the Toad had some stolen weaponry from the Stranger, but still: the Toad.

(Incidentally, I don't have the Toad Marvel Legends figure: he was part of the very first wave. Yeah, Captain America, Iron Man, the incredible Hulk, and the Toad. And he was a holdover from some earlier line that was never released, so poor Mortimer isn't even as articulated as the average ML figure. But, he is rare and kinda pricey now, so maybe he got the last laugh.)


Anyway, in a tizzy, Yellowjacket takes a swipe at Iron Man, but before either of them can react or escalate the fight, YJ is saved by the ludicrously poor timing of Whirlwind, who seems to swoop in only because he saw the opportunity to zing Hank, badly. Really, if you're pretty much Hank's arch-enemy (well, his or Jan's) maybe you want to let Iron Man soften him up a bit; and by that I mean beat him down for you.

Well, it remains to be seen if Hank will blame Tony again this time; and from the previews it kinda looks like Hank's going to be a depressed wreck rather than a surly one. Too bad, but probably just as well for him.

Coming up Monday: comparing Dark Reign and Acts of Vengeance! Both had villains sitting around a table and...um. Better come up with something over the weekend... Read more!

Timing, part six.

What the...recognize our new player? If not, relax, it'll all make sense later. Maybe.

We've talked here before about Bishop, who's future and childhood in said future has gotten progressively crappier over the last few years, until now. Now it's so bad, Bishop is basically looking at suicide, albeit a suicide that takes out his entire timeline, so some style points there. Unfortunately, even with Marvel's byzantine time-travel rules, while there's no guarantee taking out the mutant baby would prevent Bishop's timeline from becoming reality, destroying it would wreck up Rachel and Cable's timelines as well.

Wait. Going on the time-travel rule from Marvel Two-in-One #50, you can't travel back in time and change your own timeline. All you do then is bifurcate an alternate timeline, while your original path remains unchanged. So, if you travel back to assassinate some historical figure...let's say, Dante Alighieri: you kill him, but when you come back, you still have to read the Divine Comedy; but you may have the warm glow of knowing you saved some other reality's children from a lotta D's in Senior Lit.

So, long story short, Bishop's suicide solution isn't going to work. At least, for him. Reed Richards and a chalkboard could probably cure Bishop of his murderous tendency, but that doesn't sound like the most thrilling comic ever. Of course, Reed would then have to tell Cable that he's not fixing anything time travelling either.

Either they're honestly confused, or they're trying to stall until Cable can show up and shoot him; but Pool and Kurt have mixed together about half a dozen timelines. Even though the X-Men's "Days of Future Past" apocalypse timeline always pays lip service to Marvel's other characters, in the form of a big graveyard; even at the time there were several alternate, and conflicting, timelines. There was Deathlok, the original of which, as Bishop points out, was from the far-flung future of 1990. There was also the Guardians of the Galaxy and Killraven; and of course post "Days" there's Marvel 2099, the Spider-Girl future, the second batch of 2099 that doesn't really mesh with the old one, and multiple conflicting visits to "Days" again.

And of course, I do so enjoy a storyline like Avengers Forever that throws them all together. Long story short: time travel in the Marvel Universe is seemingly easy, but pretty pointless, since you can't change anything meaningful for you, and those pesky other timelines will always be out there. Just like DC and their multiple world Crisises!

Later today: who hasn't taken a swipe at Iron Man at this point.

Read more!

Last time, on Gordon's Law:

Gordon's Law #3 opens with the commissioner's second nightmare of the series, so he hasn't done much yet. Well, compared to Batman or the Punisher or something, I suppose; for a police commissioner he's pretty hands-on. After telling Sarah he's fine but doesn't want her involved, Gordon meets with Thorpe (the dirty F.B.I. agent) and Shotgun Smith (the presumably clean county sheriff). Gordon tasks them to find Junior Manklin, while he checks out the two-nine precinct, which may be involved in the federal reserve robbery.

Thorpe excuses himself to run down some leads, in this case, reporting directly to Manklin. Manklin doesn't buy that Gordon doesn't have more leads, and has to go to his boss for instructions. But first, he's distracted by new face Red Corona chatting up his girl.

Gordon stops by a cop bar near the two-nine, which goes silent as he enters. The son of Gordon's old friend Dougherty, Tim, makes small talk, but then leaves scowling.

Thorpe leads Shotgun into a trap, although they don't kill him yet, wanting to get information on Gordon's investigation first. Gordon calls Sarah and leaves a message, that unless Shotgun has some info for him, he might have to turn the investigation over to the feds, so of course a clue falls in his lap. Wait, clue? More like a hit attempt. In a Manklin Brothers truck. Not subtle, are they? Gordon takes them both out, including one in an explosion. Ducking under the water, he ends up washed out down a storm drain the next issue.

Undercover officer Bell has missed another meeting, and the detectives start to worry. Meanwhile, Junior Manklin seems pretty secure right about now:


Stuff's starting to happen, eh? I was gonna drag this out another day, but let's just wrap it up: a soggy Gordon makes his way back to his office, still in his trench coat. That's commitment. Unfortunately, someone left him a present on his desk: the body of Red Corona, with a note: "This little piggy ran all the way home." Gordon has no idea who he is, another fallen cop. Dejected and exhausted, Gordon calls out for help from a higher power, only to find nothing. No, not God; Batman:

Meanwhile, Shotgun Smith effects a daring, if pretty easy, escape: shoving Tim Dougherty out a window, landing on him, and getting the hell out of there. All while tied up, in a trench coat. Later, Gordon arrives at the scene, and since no one knows he's dirty, the cops are out in full force. Gordon is told Thorpe called in Dougherty's death, calling it a bust gone bad.

Manklin is thrilled at Thorpe's dropping the ball on Smith: Thorpe says he probably died in the fall, but Smith's made his way to his partner's house to lie low. And Gordon has just realized, the dead snitch's last word, "Doc," could have been "Dougherty." Somehow. The senior Dougherty, Pat, plays the grieving father to the officers that visit him; but behind closed doors is furious that Tim was so stupid.

And now we're halfway through the last issue, so things start to pick up: Manklin shows up, with his crew and Thorpe; to tell Dougherty he's tired of taking all the risk of laundering the money while Dougherty can hide behind his badge. Gordon shows up before things escalate, and puts together...a bunch of clues the reader wouldn't have access to.


This is why I've been going through this whole series almost page-by-page, to see if all the clues were there, and they weren't, no. Although, and I was among those that criticized Hush for this; comics have a pretty long-running standard: new friend/mentor/relative/love interest of the hero introduced in a story? They're probably the bad guy. It's a bit Scooby-Do, yeah, but most comics don't usually have the time/page count to establish a real mystery, and even if they did, wouldn't it just confuse most readers? And after four months, who remembers anyway?

Back to the story: the inevitable shootout ensues, and Dougherty and Manklin and his men are gunned down. Gordon's hit, and Thorpe just has to finish him off, collect the cash, and walk away: he's a real Fed, but "I took some vacation time. I kill you, and no one even knows I was here. Just another freak shootout in Gotham." Great plan, Thorpe, except you called in the younger Dougherty's death. Probably not too great of a leap to get to you...

Luckily for Gordon, there's still one player we haven't heard from yet. No, NOT BATMAN.

So officer Bell turns out to have been Manklin's girlfriend. Which brings to mind the terrible, terrible things she probably had to do to get under cover (so to speak) but even though she was only seen in shadows the rest of the series, she was pretty obviously a guy every time, yeah. Dixon and Janson=cheaters! (Although, they were able to avoid any gender-specific pronouns discussing Bell, and that was hard to do just writing this!)

In the end, Smith is due to be released from the hospital, Bullock apologizes to Gordon for not trusting him, and Gordon does the same to Batman. Batman brushes it off, saying he knew Gordon could handle it.

So, on the whole, Gordon's Law probably wasn't worth $7.80 in 1997, but considering I paid a dollar for the series, it's enjoyable enough fluff; and I like Janson's art. (I didn't always: he did a Star Wars Annual when I was a kid that I hated.) If you've ever thought to yourself, damn, I wish Commissioner Gordon would bust some caps, then there you go. I think, and may even have lying around from the same purchase, another Gordon-centric limited, and the one-shot Bullock's Law. None of which were anywhere near as good as Gotham Central, and I hardly have any damn issues of that. Crap. Read more!

Gordon's Law #2 brings more characters into the mix, but first one leaves: Gordon asks Bullock in on the investigation on the federal robbery, and he's in...until he hears that Gordon thinks cops were involved. Bullock refuses to go all snitchy and leaves, claiming Gordon's source Hoagland is "just blowing smoke to cop a plea."

Meanwhile, Junior Manklin makes the scene at a nightclub, blond in tow; and makes a payoff to a man named Thorpe, with bills from the robbery. A young man at the bar wants to meet Junior...no, not like that...

Elsewhere, Gordon calls in a favor with county sheriff Steve "Shotgun" Smith. Pretty sure he first appeared in a Dixon-written issue of Robin. Gordon wants Smith in since although Smith was busted out of G.C.P.D. Gordon knows he's clean. They meet with their F.B.I. help: Thorpe.

Leaving the club, joyriders nearly steal Manklin's car, but the man from the bar stops them. He introduces himself as Red Corona, and wants in. Manklin is suspicious:

I thought it was traditional to get a room before the strip search, but oh well.

Hoagland gives Gordon, a "taste" of his information: the forty-sixth precinct. In return, he wants "a nice cell with the snitches and short eyes," whatever that last one is. Two pages later, he's killed in his cell, lasting long enough to only tell Gordon, "Doc."

Elsewhere, undercover officer Bell makes a meet with a plainclothes detective; we still don't get to see his face. Thorpe meets with Manklin, asking for more cash for giving up Hoagland. Manklin's boss, presumably the one behind the robbery, has Manklin punch Thorpe in the gut and gives him new orders: "Lead them a chase."

Man, I can't imagine reading this series month-to-month. I got all four issues at once, but so far the identity of officer Bell is the big secret: we already know Thorpe's dirty, and don't have clue one who masterminded the heist. Or do we? Well, I don't. We'll see if there's any clues tomorrow. Read more!

Timing, part five.

It's not a stellar game, but the Oldest and I played (and still do play) a lot of X-Men: Next Dimension. It's fun, and it's a game you can pick up, play for a bit, and put back down without having to devote several hours to. I mention it, because Bishop is friggin' huge in it: if these toys were on that scale, Bishop would be another inch and a half, or so, far taller than Nightcrawler and Deadpool.

And Bishop isn't above pistol-whipping you, either. If you're like me, and just a fan of some X-Men and not others, it's a great game, and besides, some characters might just win you over too. John DiMaggio, the voice of Bender on Futurama, supplied Juggernaut's voice, for example.

I wrote this a while ago, and was hoping to post it before it happened, but the little mutant baby, who still remains nameless to the best of my knowledge, is being turned into a seven-year-old (or so) in an upcoming issue of Cable. The magically-aging baby is a well-worn cliche of soap operas and science fiction alike, and one I would've preferred to see avoided. (Or, has Cable spent years in the future uneventfully raising the baby to her current age? That would be less of a cheat, since it wouldn't be like Cable got out of changing diapers.) Although, you have to admit, in terms of drama, a baby is probably more like a prop than a character; so you can see the desire to phase the baby into someone who can hit a mark and hold up their end of the dialog.

Bishop was an eBay purchase, loose, without the Apocalypse build-a-figure piece or his guns. Still, I had enough guns to hold him over. We'll get more into this, but he's currently hunting Cable and the mutant baby; which is playing to his strengths. I wonder how it would go down if the situation was reversed: the planner Cable trying to capture the hunter Bishop. Well, we're not going to see here, sorry.

Read more!

One of the more enjoyable things about the Dark Knight was that for the first time in years of Batman TV shows, cartoons, and movies; we had a competent, capable, and hardcore Commissioner Jim Gordon. Although the role gets overshadowed since it's not the flashy one, Gary Oldman builds up the character a lot; making it clear that the fate of Gotham City isn't resting on Batman's shoulders alone. Previously, Gordon had been portrayed as a likable if harmless-seeming authority figure; and it was pretty obvious Batman was the one who got things done in Gotham. (The recent the Batman animated series may have been on the right track with former X-Files actor Mitch Pileggi as the voice of Commissioner Gordon, but I can't recall him getting a whole ton to do...)

But every so often in the comics, when he's not a hostage, or a talking head to deliver exposition to Batman, or catching flak for needing a costumed vigilante to help him police the city; so not very often at all then...but sometimes, we get to see Gordon being a cop. Sometimes. It may be a fine line to walk: if Gordon is too good of a cop, why would he need Batman? And the rampant graft and corruption of Batman: Year One has to be reined in a bit, or that really makes Gordon seem incompetent.

So, this week we're going to take a couple of looks at a moment for the commissioner to shine: the 1997 mini-series Gordon's Law, written by Chuck Dixon, art by Klaus Janson. The story opens with a bad one: Robbery at a federal reserve bank, with hostages. Gordon arrives as the cops receive word the first hostage has been killed; but the building is too fortified for tactical/SWAT teams to take it. They receive a call from a squad car in a shootout a couple blocks away, that armed men are making for a car, and Gordon deduces the robbers blew through a subway line and are trying to get back out there.

Redeploying forces to cover their escape, Gordon and some men stay behind to go into the bank for the hostages. Before he goes in, though, Bullock calls Gordon: they've got their area locked down, but no sign of an explosion, a shootout, or the robbers. They hadn't, in fact, gone anywhere yet, and in an armored car plow through the men remaining.

At the funeral for the lost officers, Pat Dougherty approaches Jim to give his condolences. He's introduced to Barbara and Sarah Essen (and the reader) as having "adopted Jimmy when he was new to Gotham." Neither Barbara nor Sarah like him within moments of meeting him. Dougherty tells Gordon he's at the four-six precinct now if he needs him.

Months later, some of the money has been found in unrelated raids, and an uncirculated thousand-dollar bill from the heist is found pinned to a corpse in Gotham. Gordon discusses the case with Batman, but won't give him the bill to examine. They suspect the Manklin crime family of at least moving the money, but probably too-small time for the heist itself. Gordon seems insanely frustrated by the lack of leads.


Meanwhile, the chief of detectives offers an undercover post to a new rookie. Shades of the Departed, although this one predates that movie by like a decade. I can see why they use rookies--they won't be recognized, unlike the guy driving a squad car for five years--but they have no experience, either. We don't see Officer Bell's face, but on the previous page we see Batman swing by while their conversation starts, so it's not Batman. Probably.

Later, a vice bust runs across a traditional-looking cement overshoes party. Does anyone still do that, or are there easier ways of ditching a body now? One of the perps, "Checkers" Hoagland, contacts Gordon about a deal; and gives him a hotel that has something in the safe for him: another of the thousand-dollar bills from the heist. "Checkers" wants a manslaughter charge instead of murder ("I only mixed the cement, for god's sake.") but will only talk to Gordon, no testimony. Since the fed heist was pulled off, by cops.

That would explain how the robbers used the emergency frequencies for a diversion. Gordon goes to listen to the tapes of that evening, only to find they had been wiped. He begins to set up a deal for Hoagland. Batman meets with Gordon with some info on the Manklins, and Gordon tells him to butt out. This one, is a police matter. Batman seems almost bemused at first: "Aren't they all?" Gordon goes off on him then:

This one's running a little long, so we'll take a look at the rest of the series later; especially since there's a twist that's a bit of a cheat. Read more!

Timing, part four.

Kurt and Cable know each other, but probably not especially well; although Kurt saw him as a baby...a few years ago, his time.

Deadpool loves Cable, in a completely hetero kind of way. Um. Maybe not completely. To Pool, Cable's the mutant John Wayne, an idol of he-man determination and grit. (Now that I think of it, in Pool's current book, if he halluncinated Cable the same way John Wayne appeared in Preacher, that could be something. Derivitive, maybe, but something.)

Cable knows Deadpool, and is sorry. What, too glib? Everyone has that one friend that's a bit of a screwup, and Deadpool is Cable's. In spades. I'm sure that Cable thinks Deadpool can bootstrap himself up into a useful human being someday, but Cable's not exactly going to wait with bated breath either. That, and shooting Pool is fun.

The role of mutant savior baby is played today by a Fischer-Price Play Family/Little People guy that I've had since I was maybe three. Almost all the Fischer-Price toys I had as a kid, like the airport and the parking garage and the Sesame Street guys and the camper; they're all up at my parents' place, where visiting (neighbor) kids and grandkids still play with them. But this one was my favorite, so...I was hoping I could somehow strap the kid to Cable's chest, as seen on most of the covers to his recent book. Hadn't realized the mutant baby was a girl, either. But more on that next time.

Read more!

"We interrupt our regularly scheduled programing, to bring you: Deleted scenes from Secret Invasion #8:"

Oh, and spoilers...although, it's everywhere, and if you wanted to read it, you probably would've by now, right?




Credit where due: page from Secret Invasion #8 written by Brian Michael Bendis, art by Leinel Yu. Image taken from Rokk's Comic Book Revolution, which had a solid and well-written review, which I very much appreciated since I had no intention of paying cash for this. Let's be frank: if I wanted mishandled or inconsistent characterization, plot holes we've seen coming a year away, and unclear storytelling paired with confusing art; well goddamn, I could just do that myself. And I have!

Now, I was gonna quote a little from Rokk's review, but he's taking the high road: SI may have sucked, but it's over and Dark Reign could be interesting. Well, maybe. I got the Marvel Previews for that, and have a couple of questions:

1. Vile speculation here: do you think maybe Bendis and Quesada thought McCain was going to win, instead of Obama? No offense to McCain, but the Republicans seem more likely to employ or enable a secret cabinet of super-villians. Dr. Doom, the Green Goblin, Loki, and the rest working behind the scenes; that doesn't exactly scream "Change and hope" to me. I know things are tough right now, and the country's got a lot of problems, but I would have to give Obama credit to not let that happen...

2. So, do people in the Marvel Universe know Norman Osborn was the Green Goblin? I thought that was public record, if not common knowledge. Admittedly, the MU has forgotten Tony Stark is Iron Man like six separate times. Is this Mephisto's doing, part of Brand New Day? That would actually work: Mephisto's "favor" to Pete makes his identity a secret, but also Norman's, and brings back future psycho Harry at the evil cherry on top. I don't know if they planned that out, but it would make more sense than a known murderer suddenly becoming a national hero.

3. It's early, so maybe Bendis and everyone will explain it; but regarding Norman's Dark Reign secret cabinet (which really needs a better meeting space): really? I don't recall if he's dethroned this week or not, but Doom was king of Latveria, and a secret cabinet post seems like a demotion.

The same for Namor, although there is the possibility he's taking the spot so he can be in position to stop Norman. While we know Namor isn't that bad of a guy, it seems it's usually still seen as a villain. Namor was previously offered a spot at the big table in Acts of Vengeance, back in the day, by Loki.

Loki, of course, is just there to stir the pot and cause trouble for his/her brother Thor and his friends. The Hood is this month's Kingpin, and Emma Frost...she could, like Namor, still be on the side of the angels. Norman could easily sell the cabinet spot as a way for her to protect mutants' interests, i.e. Norman not putting them in camps. There appears to be a campaign underway to give Emma even more backstory (she really didn't appear all that much through Claremont's X-Men, did she?) with Namor, Tony Stark, your dad, whoever.

But with the possible exception of the Hood, all of these characters are far more powerful than Norman, and could probably take the Green Goblin in a fight; and that struck me as unusual. I could see Norm surrounding himself with either weaker villians, or ones he could manipulate, like his Sinister Twelve in Mark Millar's Spider-Man. Doom and Namor in particular don't seem like the type you could ask to pass the salt, let alone order in any meaningful fashion.



So, Janet Van Dyne, the Wasp, is "dead." Her return would doubtless be pretty easy, but I think she'll be out for a while, at least long enough to move a few "tribute" books and torture Hank and all. Best guess: about the same time Hank starts to heal, or gets a new girlfriend, then Jan will be back. From what I've seen of this issue though, Thor comes across as pissed: the Skrulls turned Wasp into a weapon, so Thor "kills" her (maybe); then later he places the blame for everything, ever, on Tony Stark.

All of this appears to be in service of feeding the fires of Dark Reign: Norman's got his group together, but the founding Avengers? Two dead, one just rescued from the Skrulls and probably an emotional wreck, one super-pissed off, and one now public enemy number one, apparently. This is where Marvel seems to excel, though: planning the next big event. Let's see how this one is executed...



The ongoing "Timing" strip with Nightcrawler and Deadpool, will be back Tuesday. See you then! Read more!

I missed Darth Vader, but I did get to tell a Tusken Raider what I wanted for Christmas. What am I getting now? Sand. Also, I'm pretty sure he took a potshot at my car on the way home...


Kidding aside, the 501st Legion and the Comic Book Shop looked to have racked up quite a pile for Toys for Tots, and all the best to them and the kids.

But for myself, or yourself, don't forget Paul's contest over at Toy Bender! I'm entering now, and if you can donate some toys, so should you! Read more!

Right this minute:

Oh. My. God. I was watching a Dirty Harry movie on Bravo, and then the Dead Pool started. I haven't seen it in like twenty years, and wasn't planning on watching it again now; but before I left, this scene started, and I about died. Never been a Jim Carrey fan, so that was probably the funniest thing I've ever seen him in...

Even more oddly, right at the end of the clip, the director of Carrey's video saying "Cut"? Liam Neeson. Yeah, they both leave this one of their resumes now... Read more!

In their cartoons like Justice League Unlimited, one thing that DC has been able to do especially well, is make list of B-list (or lower) characters. Yeah, maybe lower. I'm not talking about, say, the addition of Hawkgirl to the initial lineup--does anyone remember thinking that wasn't going to work? Seems like it turned out ok...no, what I mean is that they were able to work in characters like the Blackhawks, or Viking Prince, or even Warlord, and give them more exposure there than in like forty years of comics.

Marvel seems to have moved away from that shared universe, at least when it comes to cartoons. Remember the 90's Spider-Man show, and it's guest-stars like Captain America, the Punisher, or Nick Fury? Now Spectacular Spider-Man is a pretty good cartoon, but seems to be in it's own little world. No Avengers, Fantastic Four, or Iron Man guest-spots or even cameos; probably because they've all been licensed to their own shows and toes would be stepped on...but even lower-tier names like Iron Fist or Deathlok don't get their moment in the sun, and everyone's the poorer for it: the shows, the viewers, the characters, society.

All of this occurs to me, as an excuse to post a Devil Dinosaur page.


In case you've forgotten it, in 1999-2000 Fox and Marvel tried to follow-up on their success with X-Men and Spider-Man with an Avengers cartoon. Which sounds like a slam-dunk...except they didn't use Captain America, Thor, or Iron Man as regular team members. Which leaves the charming and charismatic...Wasp and Giant-Man? Really? And they gave Hawkeye a costume that will make you miss the brown skirt-thing and headband he wore in the seventies...

While it wasn't as terrible as you probably think now, Avengers wasn't amazing, or successful, only running for one season. I thought the Silver Surfer was a much better show, but between that and that Spider-Man show where he goes into space to Counter-Earth, that was about it for Marvel animation for a few years.

Since the cartoon didn't catch on, the comic version Avengers: United They Stand only lasted seven issues; although in fairness that's pretty typical for Marvel's adaptations of their own stuff. (Conversely, DC can pretty easily get at least a couple years worth out of any show--their Legion of Super-Heroes in the 30th Century Johnny DC book seemed to do better than the show...) Ty Templeton, who has done art for a ton of animated-style comics since the Batman Adventures, was on board for United They Stand...as the writer. That sounds worse than it is: Templeton is a writer as well; I liked his graphic novel Bigg Time.

The writing was probably on the wall by the time the last issues were written, so I like to think Templeton decided to wrap up a couple loose ends (the Black Panther, who appears in the first issue but is badly injured) and what the hell, throw in Captain America, a Stephen Hawkings-lookalike, the Collector, and Devil Dinosaur and Moon-Boy. And even though he still has to take his usual blame (in this case, for the Panther's injuries at the hands of Ultron) Henry Pym does get a shining moment as Giant-Man punches out Devil Dinosaur.


I am positive if more people saw Giant-Man slug Devil Dinosaur, they would give Pym less crap about slugging the Wasp. And I'm pretty sure if Devil Dinosaur had been on the cartoon, not only would Avengers still be on, we'd still have goddamn cartoons on Saturday mornings. Way to drop the ball, guys, but Ty Templeton, Derec Aucoin, and Walden Wong try to show us the way with Avengers: United We Stand #6-7. Read more!

Timing, part three.

Back in Claremont's last run on Uncanny X-Men, there's a moment where Rachel and Kurt kiss, then have no idea if that's something they should pursue or not. Apparently, not. There was also a lot of weird tension between Storm and Kurt, and that carried over into the Nightcrawler solo book; but also didn't really go anywhere. On the other hand, either false start is still more entertaining than another installment of "Kurt builds a chapel," in the most current issue (#505?) so now I feel bad for bashing Claremont. Sigh.

Ah, Cable. While Deadpool was the draw for me on their team-up series, Fabian Nicieza did a good job of selling him as the straight man to Pool's comedy. I also see Nate as an insane planner, who probably has little hidden bases, gun drops, and hideouts all over the world; because things tend to go south around him. Of course, he's not gonna tell that blabbermouth Pool where they are: Pool's not a snitch, but I'm betting he can't keep a secret; and he'd be far too likely to loot Cable's guns anyway.

In case I haven't mentioned it by now, the most recent issue of Deadpool(#4, and counting his two limited series, I think this is his fourth solo #4) is great. I'm not sure about the multiple voices in Pool's head, but it's a good narrative device for using a solo Deadpool: no Cable, Blind Al, Weasel, Bob, etc. The hallucinations don't quite work for me yet, though.

Strangely, we've got another post scheduled for later today. Weird. "Timing" continues next week!

Read more!

Vertigo Comics has had its hits over the years, like Sandman, Preacher, or Transmetropolitan; and also some successes imported from the DC Universe proper, like Swamp Thing, Animal Man, or the Doom Patrol. But for every import that thrives, or even does respectably (like, say, Unknown Soldier or the Losers) Vertigo's had a ton of DC transplants that are forgettable at best. Tomahawk, Prez, Black Orchid, Congo Bill, Deadman...a lot of characters and titles that didn't break it any bigger in Vertigo than in DC.

Which brings us to another revival: Angel and the Ape. Written by the American Century team of Howard Chaykin and David Tischman...look, I don't care if Chaykin's done a ton of other books, I liked that one...and art by Philip Bond of the perennial classic Kill Your Boyfriend; this revival had a strong pedigree. Actually, it was Angel and the Ape's second revival, Phil Foglio had previously done a 1991 miniseries. The thing is, I didn't read that one...or the original series. And I've read a lot of comics, but apparently they're hard to come by, and I can only recall one comic with the duo.

I can see why it would be tempting to try and bring it back, though, since it seems to have that high concept hook: she's a hot young blond! He's a gorilla that wants to draw comics! Together, they fight crime! In some versions, Angel's a ditz--at best--and Sam Simeon, the titular Ape, can talk; in the Vertigo series, Angel's a party girl, no rocket scientist, but not dumb; Sam can't talk but no one seems to have a problem with him being a gorilla.

This was a four-issue limited, which probably would've led to more if it had taken off; which I guess it did not. Maybe it's just I've liked other Chaykin books better (I liked the all-but-forgotten Power and Glory, for pete's sake...) but it seems like they were trying to walk a fine line between smutty and funny and didn't quite nail either, but both have their moments. Bond's art is great though, so good I'm not quite sure how it didn't carry the whole project through. Maybe it wasn't promoted enough, maybe it was promoted as a nostalgia book when it totally wasn't, and don't you have to remember something to be nostalgic for it? And the four issues were one mystery; second-guessing, maybe two shorter stories or single-issues might've been the way to go. Yeah, like I know.

Currently, Vertigo's got new versions of the Haunted Tank and another shot at Unknown Soldier (Garth Ennis did a limited with him, that I really need to finish a writeup for here...) so they haven't run out of DC characters looking for a new limelight. Probably won't for a while, either. It might not be tops of anyone else's list, but I'd love to see a revival/relaunch of The Barren Earth myself.

Cheer up: if they ever do a Vertigo Sugar and Spike, maybe then you'll get that Showcase collection. Some readers might remember a few years back Kevin Smith took an almost Vertigo-style look at Stanley and His Monster in Green Arrow, of all places...I think I'd prefer Sam's version. Or Philip Bond's. Read more!

Even if you're not a plastic hording toymonger action figure collector (which kinda begs the question why you're here...) Toys for Tots is a great charity, and one that I always make sure I have something for every year. But this Christmas, besides that warm feeling of giving, or a cynical excuse for you to buy that pegwarming DCUC Penguin figure in the hopes of Toys R Us finally restocking Wave 4; now you have a couple more unexpected, and awesome, reasons to give: over at Toy Bender, Paul's got a great contest going, so you can win prizes for helping kids. That last link is to an update with more prizes, and Cobra Commander...um, commanding you, I guess...so now you have no excuse.

What's that? You need more of a reason? You've got some nerve, buddy...but, if you live in my neck of the woods, or what the heck, gas is cheaper again; The Comic Book Shop's new Valley location (Spokane Valley, not any other, possibly more renown valley...) is having a little visit from the 501st Legion Saturday December 6, from 3 to 6 PM! Blazes with Santa, bring a toy for donation and tell Lord Vader what you want for Christmas! (I'm asking not to be strangled, the greatest gift of all...)

Of course, Paul's pulling for you to give G.I. Joe figures, and the 501st would probably prefer a Star Wars toy or two, and I'll probably donate some inexplicable third thing. Hopefully some pictures this weekend, but local or no, be sure to give! Read more!

Timing, part two.

Giant Final Fantasy-style sword or no, Korvus really does suck; but his suckiness is undermined by the fact that he's so totally doomed. He's got tragic death that's forgotten twenty minutes later written all over him.

I like Rachel a lot, since she was on the team way back in John Romita Jr.'s first run on Uncanny X-Men, back when I first started really reading it; then her stint on Excalibur. She always seemed to have a pretty cheery attitude considering she's likewise utterly doomed on so many levels; and her origin needs a flowchart to make any sense.

The last I saw, she and Korvus were the only Starjammers or X-Men or whatever still on the loose, since third Summers brother/tool Vulcan had taken over the Shi'ar Empire and captured Havok, Polaris, and the rest. I know it's leading up to the next crossover thing, "War of Kings," but it seems like they've been out of play for a while. Also, can anyone explain to me why Gladiator (the big mohawked Superman type) and the Imperial Guard (the thinly, thinly veiled Legion of Super-Heroes analog) always, always, always, end up on the bad guy's side? Worse still, they know it! Some jerk takes over, but because he's on the throne, the Guard obeys, even when said jerk declares war on the universe. Every time...

Read more!

What would absolutely make Batman: RIP for me:

(A minor spoiler for a relatively minor bit in Batman #681 follows, so beware if you missed it last week, or the ongoing shouting. There's a new issue out Wednesday, anyway...)

(Oh, you're gonna look.)








Regardless of the title, or whatever happens the next however many issues until his triumphant return, this isn't gonna be the final appearance of Bruce Wayne as Batman. No oddsmaker in Vegas would give you 500-to-1 on it. However, if this was the last appearance of the Joker...casually run down mid-escape attempt by Batman's psychotic son Damian in the Batmobile? That's damn funny. That would be the funniest thing the Joker's done in years.

(Over at the Factual Opinion, they fairly eviscerated this issue; pointing out that Alfred doesn't seem overly moved that Damian runs an ambulance off the road; but the scene isn't clear if the kid saw that it was the Joker, that said ambulance had just plowed through a police barricade, or if he just doesn't give the proverbial rat's ass. Frankly, it's the least of this story's problems. Maybe in trade and footnoted and packaged with the ancient back issues with the space backup personality nonsense...still seems iffy, yeah.)

From Batman #681, "Hearts in Darkness" Written by Grant Morrison, pencils by Tony Daniel, inks by Sandu Florer. Read more!