"See."

Although the plot doesn't move even incrementally forward this week, I think we're maybe coming up on the end of the D'spayre storyline. Maybe. I did have this notion, of the bar getting trashed, if not leveled; then building a new, "remodeled" bar set. But I don't really have the time right now, even though I have maybe another set piece coming in the mail this week. Which, co-incidentally, we mentioned, um, about a year back. Read more!

"Greenie."

I've never had therapy--which hopefully doesn't show--but Doc Samson irritates me sometime. In fact, I was thinking of him getting clowned by a training robot in Marvel Two-In-One Annual #7, but he appeared in a strip in 2008, where Nightcrawler teleports him away! Sometimes he's a bit smug and know-it-all, and I felt like he was leering inappropriately at Polaris's new costume in X-Factor #87... 

Because I don't have a big yellow bubble to use, we've seen Quasar put people in a quantum-construct jail before, too. Oh, and Quasar's hanging out with an old friend: Makkari! Who is now a girl, because of the Eternals movie: regular 616-continuity has played it off as "Eternals change up sometimes" and left it at that. Quasar'd be cool with it, although I wonder how much sign language he knows.

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"Messed."

Plotwise, I kind of know where this is going to end, but it's still open enough for things to surprise me. I don't know if I had more planned for Hallow's Eve and Chasm right now: they might have been derailed by the last week of work! The TMNT Jack Kirby gets to make an appearance, because I really liked him flanked by Crystal and Sersi in the year-ender post. And Doc Samson came up before in this storyline, when Kurt mentions him to Moonstone, back in October! 

I know in regular Marvel continuity, he's a big green Sasquatch now, and...I don't see it? This might be me overlaying Frasier on top of him, but I see Samson as maybe being a bit fussy and fastidious, approaching snooty. He maybe thought becoming a gamma-powered he-man would change that, and maybe it did for a bit, but old habits...He probably overcorrected when he realized the amount of control he would have to maintain on his strength. That and Samson would never, ever allow himself to agree with someone like Moonstone, even if she was in the right on this one.

I really wanted to use the phrase "pardon my back" in the panel where Doc Samson moves to leave, since I remember it from an old Hulk comic! But it wasn't from Samson: Bruce says it to Samantha Parrington, after the Hulk/Valkyrie fight fizzes out, in Incredible Hulk #142, which was collected in a paperback.  

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He's trying to play it as mysterious, but it comes off as the minimum contractually allowed appearance.

Also, as is so often the case, a guy's superhero outfit once again looks better on a girl, in today's book! From 1996, Doc Samson #3, "Copycats" Plot by Dan Slott, script by Evan Skolnick, pencils by Roberto Flores and Andrew Wildman, inks by Brad Vancata and Ralph Cabrera.

The gamma-powered shrink Doc Samson, is on the trail of gamma-powered serial killer Patchwork, accompanied by gamma-powered new girl Geiger. While Patchwork was abducting and murdering women to steal body parts to build his "perfect woman," Geiger could copy the powers and "mindsets" of other gamma-types. Watching her imitate him, Samson wonders if he should have embraced the super-hero mentality more, since she sells it pretty well. They do not do especially well against Patchwork, since they don't know what the hospitalized Jennifer Walters has realized: Patchwork can steal gamma-power. Samson tries to end the fight quickly, but then fears he may have killed the monster, just like he feels he killed the Punisher, back in his first issue after Double Edge.

After Patchwork kills another girl and escapes, Doc Samson throws in the towel, and takes a cab to the airport. He's stopped by a sniper blowing out the cab's tire: the Punisher! Or a fake, Samson assumes, since he wouldn't know about Frank faking his demise. Man, Frank's ponytail is long here, he's got longer hair than Samson! Frank is laying down the hard truths here: he didn't think he was the best choice to take down Patchwork, Samson was. Now doubting his sanity along with everything else, Samson gets a phone call from Kyle Barker, whose life he had saved in an earlier issue, and who of course is Patchwork.

Really feels like Frank phoned this one in; but look, I could see him not wanting to be around Samson much. It's like he received gamma-powered overthinking along with the hair...I don't know if she survived, or kept her powers, but I already kind of like Geiger better than the doctor.
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As usual, all of the jerks are in Tower One..

"The City of New York vs. Homer Simpson" is a classic episode forever undermined by the specter of 9/11; but it kills me that some conspiracy types see 'clues' to the disaster in it. They probably see them here, too: from 1975, the Incredible Hulk #193, "The Doctor's Name is...Samson!" Written and edited by Len Wein, pencils by Herb Trimpe, inks by Joe Staton and John Romita.

Bruce Banner is taking a ship from Europe to America, but it's hardly a cruise: it's a rattrap freighter, that also happens to be dumping radioactive waste. Cue the Hulk, ship sinks, etc. Usually that would mean a Sub-Mariner appearance, but not today. Instead, it's the return of Doc Samson, as a 'gammatron' 'accident' blasts him with radiation and gives him his powers again, seemingly for good. He wonders if maybe he wanted that to happen, and is thrilled at the thought of facing off with the Hulk again. Which wouldn't take long!

Tracking the Hulk down in New York City, Samson is laughing and overconfident, telling the Hulk to come back with him willingly, or dragged. He's able to dance around the Hulk's clumsy attacks, and lures him to the top of the World Trade Center towers, which did not appear to be that far apart here! The Hulk punches his ass to 122nd street, which at a glance seems easier than driving there. After nearly crushing a bunch of kids playing baseball, Samson demands a rematch. Why he tells the kids that, is anyone's guess.

I'd suspect Samson would be a bit more humble in his next appearance, but I could be wrong.
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Admittedly, much of this issue is the Hulk vs. little kids.

The back cover points out this would be Hulk and Gladiator's first brawl, but then why wasn't it on the front cover? From 1997, the Incredible Hulk '97 (Annual), featuring "Sins of the Father" Written by Chris Cooper, pencils by Jeff Rebner, inks by Mark Irwin; and "Where the Wild Things Are" Written by Bill Rosemann, pencils by Kevin Lau, inks by Andrew Pepoy.

Since this issue wasn't written by Peter David, I had to look it up and make sure it wasn't after his tenure on the title: no, David was still writing the regular book, but this was mid-Heroes Reborn, and it was floundering a bit. (Although, it would've just recently had the first appearance of the Thunderbolts!) The Hulk was in full-on "leave Hulk alone" mode, and the lead story begins with Doc Samson trying to figure out what can be done, when he's approached by members of the Pantheon. (Who have been woefully underused post-David, but here they're mostly drawn resembling S.H.I.E.L.D. agents.) They want Samson's help, with Bruce Banner's son!

Elsewhere, the Hulk sets up shop, at a nuclear power plant; for the benefit of his companion, Janis. (She had come from the Future Imperfect timeline, where the Hulk had become the tyrant Maestro.) The Hulk figures no one would attack them there, for fear of causing a nuclear disaster; the unsympathetic Hulk even suggests he wouldn't care if one happened regardless. And in New York City, the telepathic Oracle becomes aware of a fugitive from Shi'ar justice, and tells her boss in the Imperial Guard...

The Pantheon believe the boy, David, to be the baby that Betty Banner had said she had miscarried; and Samson sees him as another opportunity to try and reach the Hulk. His attempts at breaking the ice with David are interrupted by an attack that takes out the attending Pantheon members, but Samson still gets the boy to his father. Who seems not to care, in the least. That may be just as well, since now Gladiator of the Imperial Guard claims David!

Gladiator and Oracle explain that "David" is really a changeling, one that can duplicate down to the genetic level, and lives an entire life as a mortal, not even knowing what it really is. It had encountered the Hulk in space and thought that would be a good next life, but was wanted for crimes from a previous life; none of which "David" would've recalled at all. Gladiator's reaction to Janis's intervention triggers a flashback to Bruce's own childhood traumas, and then it's on. Although Gladiator has incredible strength, flight, and eye-beams, none of them prove to be a match for the Hulk's unchecked rage. (That and the Hulk sticks him in the nuclear reactor for a bit.) Hulk nearly beats Gladiator to death, stopping only when he sees the fear in "David's" eyes.

Post-case, Samson again wonders if anything can help the Hulk, and figures the changeling will do its best to not be "David" if it can avoid it.

The B-story makes the lead cover, which I don't get: I know a lot of Marvel readers would recognize Artie and Leech, but they couldn't be a bigger draw than Gladiator. This story, with their friend Franklin Richards having nightmares about a "green monster," A&L take it upon themselves to save him from the Hulk.

I think that nightmare vision of Bruce's dad had been used before, and was friggin' terrifying.
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