I can't have an actual swear jar, I'd have to direct deposit my paychecks into it.

Either the comic shop should have this, or I should: every time I buy a comic I know full well I have already somewhere, throw something in the jar! We can't do it as a drinking game anymore, I can hear my liver grinding now. From 1994, the Night Man #5, "Alone" Written by Steve Englehart, pencils by Kyle Hotz, inks by Jason Minor.

This was the conclusion of a two-parter introducing Night Man's primary female villain, Rhiannon, although he maybe doesn't know that yet: previously, he had saved two women from having their organs harvested by a cloaked, hooded figure, who escaped. At a crime scene, with a body that was almost completely cracked open; Night Man tries to share info with the cops, which pretty much just turns into an argument: "Ooh, yeah, like the cops are all trustworthy" is a legit point in 1994, or now, but won't make you many friends on the force.

Still, the round left eye on his mask wasn't just "for effect," it also recorded video! Ah, VHS. Miss you, old friend. (I don't think Night Man lugged even a miniature VHS recorder on him all the time, but maybe just swapped it in as needed.)

Night Man works the clues, back to Rhiannon's fake fiance, a dupe who's still smitten with her, and Johnny knows how the guy feels. He wonders why he was doing the superhero thing, instead of his far more enjoyable life as a jazz musician; but since he could 'hear' evil, he didn't feel like he had a choice. Remembering the end of Vertigo, Night Man catches up to Rhiannon near the Golden Gate Bridge, but she's set an elaborate, somewhat Looney Tunes trap with a rope net and a cannon. She admits, she felt the attraction between them too, but a 4700-year-old woman has to be a little picky: either he proves himself by escaping, or dies and she uses his organs to keep herself alive for another six-year cycle. You can tell she's pulling for him, but isn't so sentimental that she wouldn't eat him or whatever if he failed.

The Night Man escapes, but can't get past the fact that she had killed hundreds--thousands, Rhiannon corrects him--of people over the course of her life. Rhiannon counters, hey, girl's gotta eat: she didn't ask for that, and god forbid a woman have hobbies. She shoves him, and he goes over the side, barely clinging to a wire: Rhiannon tries to save him, even though she has no intention of not murdering people. Instead, Night Man zaps her with the taser in his glove, and she goes into the bay. Feeling like he had chosen to be alone, he goes home to his pirate radio station--shades of Pump Up the Volume! I think he usually used it for emergency contact purposes, not just to play the blues. I also don't know enough sax music: personally, I hear the riff from "Baker Street" every time he gets that thing out.

The letters page mentions, it would be tough to replace Darick Robertson and Gene Ha, but Kyle Hotz would be the regular artist for a bit. He's great! I think he would go on to Ghost Rider 2099 later, another book that had just a murderers' row of great artists yet didn't have a particularly long run.

Bonus: I have enough magnets on my fridge to give myself an MRI every morning, but it was annoying the crap out of me that I couldn't find my the Green Slime movie poster magnet! So, I ordered a new one, along with this Russian-looking poster for the Night Man on VHS! Read more!

This is maybe trying to have your cake and eat it too; before all the cakes get taken away.

Every so often on Pluto TV's Sci-Fi channel (apparently not related to the SyFy Channel?) they'll run a block of Night Man, the TV series from the late 90's, based on the Malibu (later Marvel) comic. I enjoy it, even if objectively it's not very good; and I feel like I'm going to say much the same about today's book. From 1995, Night Man #∞, "This is Black September" Written by Steve Englehart, pencils by Dean Zachary, inks by Chad Hunt and H.E.R.C.

We last saw the Night Man some time back, getting just wrecked on a metaphysical level by Loki and the Reality Gem. This resulted in there now being two Night Men, who were ostensibly the same but were starting to become more and more different with the choices they made. After finally learning of each other and accusing the other of murdering Chinese women and harvesting organs, they are confronted by their main recurring villain, the mystic Rhiannon. Wha--no, not that one! I don't think. Well, maybe. She was immortal in the Vandal Savage manner: she periodically needed to harvest, and probably eat, various organs to maintain herself. Although, she has an ulterior motive to her cannibalism today: jealousy, that Johnny Domino was dating a Chinese woman, and not her. But with two Night Men, has she doubled her chances? The one currently in costume agrees to join her: he feels Rhiannon's knowledge could aid his fight against evil, and he could get her organs without having to kill anyone, from accidents or donations. (That seems optimistic.) The plainclothes Johnny argues two Night Men were already pretty good, but the other counters the night was more than twice as black as they had known, citing "it's not just night, it's space!" Rhiannon cracks Johnny over the skull with a bottle, then takes her Night Man to Stonehenge...

Believing his alternate was making a mistake following Rhiannon into darkness, Johnny heads home to get his passport, only to be confronted by his dad: the alternate had set up a password, so Johnny appeared to be a fake. Rhiannon and Night Man already appeared to be at Stonehenge, though; as she plans to make use of the power floating around from the somewhat nebulous "Black September" crossover. Real "red skies" feel to that one. Rhiannon claims to have been born there, 4700 years ago; but she also won't be treated as a "slut." If the Night Man wanted to learn from her, he would have to get with her; and he seems to give in. He also has to fight some stag-headed spirits, to "ride (the power) like a wave from the sea!" But the other Night Man approaches by motorcycle--a rental, borrowed, stolen? Don't know!

The other Night Man arrives just before what obviously was going to be the big finish, and tackles his double, as reality seems to collapse. Rhiannon's Night Man gets a Celtic makeover, but is left alone in Stonehenge: Rhiannon and original flavor Night Man have disappeared, with the latter briefly appearing through a mystic door in combat with Wolverine! The Celtic version is left to wonder what his new powers mean...

Since this issue, like the rest of the Ultraverse's issues that month, was number infinity; I had to look if this was the start or the end of what would be a five-issue run: the start. This particular copy is the 1-in-5 variant; most of the run was a black cover...man, one gimmick at a time, OK? After this series, Night Man would get a three-issue gumbo with Gambit, and I'm not sure it ends well for anyone involved; but the Ultraverse was collectively shelved around then. Read more!

80-Page Thursdays: Mutants vs. Ultras: First Encounters #1!

Is this Thanksgiving? It's actually the weekend of SDCC as I write this. I'm ahead of schedule, and plan on staying that way! But, figure you probably have other things to do today, and this weekend, so we'll do the laziest 80-Page Thursday post yet: from 1995, Mutants vs. Ultras: First Encounters #1!

Crap, this isn't going to be as lazy as I had thought: at first glance, I thought this issue was actually Battlezones: Dream Team 2 #1, which was a pin-up book pitting the Malibu Ultraverse characters against their new friends from Marvel Comics. Instead, Mutants vs. Ultras reprinted three of the first crossovers of Malibu and Marvel: Prime vs. the Hulk, the Night Man vs. Wolverine, and the Exiles vs. the X-Men. (The Ultraverse's Exiles were different than the reality-hopping Marvel version; although Juggernaut, Reaper, and Sienna Blaze end up doing a stint on the former.)

Although the Ultraverse was a separate reality from the Marvel Universe (think Earth-2, like the old DC multiverse) both Prime and the Night Man got stuck in the 616 for a time. (Well, one Night Man, anyway: he had been duplicated after a run-in with Loki.) They have the typical Marvel misunderstanding punch-ups with the Hulk and Wolverine; while the X-Men are trying to help Professor X find his missing step-brother Juggernaut.

These weren't terrible, in a typical 90's comic way; but certainly not worth the cost--and I don't mean the $6.95 cover price. The originals were sold as collector items: the GCD mentions Night Man vs. Wolverine #0: "This was a mail away comic offered from Marvel and advertised in their comics; The Premium Edition was limited to 30,000 copies and cost $10.00; The Super Premium Edition was limited to 10,000 copies and cost $39.95." I don't know what the other two cost, but I think they were offered in a similiar fashion.

Although Marvel purchased the Ultraverse characters, their creators allegedly had contracts in place that stipulate they get a certain percentage of sales; which make it less profitable for Marvel to use the characters. Plus, it probably follows there would be some complaining if the creators of Prime get a kickback and the creators of the Hulk don't...that said, I'd be surprised if the Ultraverse characters aren't brought back at some point. Like when Spider-Man, the Hulk, the Avengers, X-Men, Fantastic Four, Daredevil and everyone else take a dip in profitability...

Read more!

There's a Bendis line somewhere in Siege, where to psych themselves up for the invasion of Asgard, a villain declares that Asgardians aren't that tough. Except for Thor, "who's like their Spider-Man." That's the extent that I'm going to research that, since I didn't read Siege, and why should I research that when Bendis didn't research Asgardians?

Let's look at the old Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe: Deluxe Edition. The Warriors Three can each press in the thirty to forty ton range (per issue #14) but they would be considered tough even among other Asgardians, right? Well, even Loki, who wouldn't be thought of as a big fighter, can press about thirty tons. (Per #7.) For comparison, going by the old numbers, Thor can press about 100 tons, Spidey about 10. While physical strength doesn't win fights alone, someone who can turn a human into a gritty paste with an open-handed slap is going to have a solid win-loss record fighting on earth. Any earth; which brings us to today's issue: The Night Man #22, "Encounters in a Crowded Alley!" Written by Steve Englehart, pencils by Dean Zachary, inks by Bruce McCorkindale; and guest-starring Loki!

This wasn't the Marvel Universe's first incursion crossover with Malibu; but the stakes were being raised: Loki wipes out last month's villain Chalk (no loss there...) as he arrives to claim the Reality Gem from the Infinity Gauntlet. Always the trickster, Loki tells the Night Man about how he rules Asgard ("save for a few minor distractions!" meaning Odin and Thor) and has come for the gem.

Thinking him a loon, the Night Man tries to overpower Loki, who is far stronger than he looks. Loki throws him, but NM lands by the gem and grabs it. Maybe.


Now this gets tricky: is the Reality Gem warping the Night Man's perception and judgement? Or is it a trick from Loki? Every possible choice the Night Man could make, every possible outcome, creates another divergent Night Man, several of whom are straight up freaking out. One tries to "be all!" and pull it all back together; instead, the universe is too much, and he disintegrates. Eventually, he manages to pull himself together, which leaves him two choices: fight Loki to the death, or not mess with the Reality Gem, which splits him in two again. The Night Man that chooses fight is killed instantly by Loki; who takes the Gem and taunts him.

The remaining Night Man confesses that he's learned his limitations, and asks Loki if he's done the same. Loki leaves with the Gem, but a spare Night Man is seen in the background in the end...It's implied but not completely clear, that Loki let the Night Man grab the Gem first, so it would do what it did to him. That interpretation is given a little weight since Loki easily could've pushed him down and just taken it.

This would be the second-to-last issue of this run of Night Man, although he would get a couple of limited series later. While his powers (the ability to 'hear' other people's evil thoughts) were interesting, I rather liked the trial-and-error approach he took to superheroing. Sadly, it looks like he had more episodes of his syndicated TV show than comic issues. Read more!

Retro Toy Week: Night Man!

I'm pretty sure, before they were bought up by Marvel, Malibu Comics managed to get Ultraforce made into a cartoon and on the air, then the Night Man got a live-action TV series that lasted two seasons. And in 1995, Night Man got an action figure.

It's from the middle of the nineties, and aesthetically, yeah, it's shows: his hair looks like a lot of long-haired figures from that decade, kind of a big plastic blob. His articulation is of the time, neck, shoulders, elbows, knees, and hips. That was good enough for then. The paint's, eh, not super crisp; and Johnny Domino's accessories were a ratty cape and a gigantic grappling hook. Which is slightly ironic, maybe: in his show, Night Man gets a suit that lets him fly, because setting up those effects shots for a grappling hook gun and swinging around and whatnot would've been murder for a cheap syndicated show. Flying suit, blue-screen, done.

Even though I'm the one guy that liked the character and the comic (with art by Darick Robertson and Kyle Hotz in early issues) poor Night Man doesn't fit in with any toys I have on display right now. That, and his costume is a bit generic; so he's bound for storage as soon as he's done here. He'll be there for next time...
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And now it's time for a comic, that will probably confirm for most of you that I'm not all here. Well, I don't care. I liked the Night Man.

I love that he's stuck with a power that sounds interesting, and maybe even useful, at least at first: Johnny Domino, jazz musician, gets hit by a cable car and a chunk of metal lodged in his brain. He ends up unable to sleep and with his eyes dilated a bit, but no other ill effects. Once he gets out of the hospital though, he realizes he can hear other people's evil thoughts.

Even putting aside most people probably don't think they're evil even when they're waist deep in atrocities, it still doesn't seem that helpful, does it? Johnny gets his ass jumped twice in the first issue alone by evildoers who acted without really thinking. But it's a bloody great storytelling engine (to steal John Seavey's term) as Johnny could be anywhere: at a show, at a restaurant, buying groceries, then hear evil being planned, and bam! It's off to the races.

The problem is, Johnny can't take the tack that I would with his powers, mainly walking the streets with a lead pipe and hitting every evildoer I 'heard' in the kneecaps. ("You! Pay those taxes! You! Quit cheating on your wife! You! Stop it! Just stop!") That would make for a short, but highly entertaining crimefighting career, before I was locked up and medicated full of things ending in 'zine.'

So, Johnny starts down the road of costumed vigilantism, in a trial-and-error fashion. In short order, he learns most cornices can't support a full-grown man on a four-story drop, infrared lenses will shatter if you land on your face, and capes look cool and are snuggily warm. (And doesn't Darick Robertson draw nice teeth? Better than Spider Jerusalem's snaggily ones in Transmetropolitan.)

Conveniently, Johnny's a cop's son, which not only gives him access to police information, but he also had aikido training from the age of 5. Which does at least save us yet another training montage, I suppose. He's also not afraid to just shoot a guy (or at least wing 'em), which strikes me as a completely logical response if you can hear someone thinking. Again, I probably would've gone insane with violence inside of twenty minutes, although I know I would have a lower tolerance for people's petty, evil thoughts. Johnny should count his blessings that he just hears 'evil,' and not 'stupid.' Or worse.

Granted, a lot of things in this comic aren't perfect: Steve Englehart's jazz fixation doesn't seem to add much, except cheesy one-liners, although I admit what I don't know about jazz could and probably does fill a record store. How many cops own amusement parks? (Hmm, Johnny has the same hair color as longtime X-Men nuisance Arcade. There's a crossover that hasn't been suggested before, I'm sure.) And shouldn't Johnny be pretty insane without sleep? (Short answer: no, through the magic of comic book medicine. The 'sleep center' of his brain was destroyed, so he couldn't sleep anymore but didn't need to, and he meditated a few hours a night to rest.)

If remembered at all, Night Man's probably known for his syndicated TV show. I'm going to be charitable and call it limited--by the budget and the constraints of special effects. ("Grappling hooks are hard to set up, and would mean more exterior shots...what if he could fly?") And once Marvel bought the Malibuverse...ugh. Little says the 90's more than a guest-spot from Gambit, which I'm pretty sure was the last time I willingly bought something with Gambit in it.

Actually...maybe not. I'd have to look up the dates, but I did buy a Gambit Annual because it had a Nightcrawler appearance. Even though it was square in the middle of his 'Father Kurt' phase. It's a terrible, terrible comic, part of the retroactive insertion of Gambit into the Mutant Massacre story from several years before his first appearance. Colossus, Nightcrawler, Kitty Pryde, and Angel all guest; and all were severely injured during the Massacre. I was hoping to see them retroactively kick Gambit's ass sideways.

And we're off the tracks again, so, in closing: Night Man was cooler than you think, and Gambit sucks even more than you had imagined. He sucks from before his creation now, if you can believe it. From The Night Man #1, written by Steve Englehart, pencilled by Darick Robertson, inked by Andrew Pepoy.

(Marvel's handling of Malibu's books was like, if you had a friend that drove professionally, had several of his own cars that were in great shape, and knew how to get a lot of mileage out of a vehicle. So you lend him your car and he drives it around the block, cracks the block, then blows it up. Like Ghost and Static, Night Man's comic universe is more or less lost and gone forever.)

Gambit Annual 2000 was written by Fabian Nicieza with art by Cam Smith, Thomas Derencik, and Eric Cannon; all of whom I'm sure have done better, non-Gambit work. Read more!