I probably could've taken this comic apart for better scans, it wouldn't have hurt it any.

Back in the second year of this blog we saw a later Batman/Mister Miracle team-up from Brave and the Bold, and today I just so happen to have an earlier one. Sure it's beat to hell, but that just means it's been loved! From 1974, The Brave and the Bold #112, featuring "The Impossible Escape" Written by Bob Haney, art by Jim Aparo. 

This was a hundred-pager, but it's sadly lost the cover and a few pages, so I don't get to see the conclusion of Batman and Green Lantern's team-up against the Time Commander, or the first few pages of this one. And since it's Bob Haney, we could've already missed an alien invasion, a South American coup, three visits from Morgana the kissing bandit, and the astonishing return of Jim Brown.

We meet Batman and Commissioner Gordon, fighting invaders to an Egyptian tomb moved stone-by-stone to Gotham, already in progress. (An aside here, possibly for my own reference: I have seen the phrase "stone-by-stone" dropped casually in a number of comics, usually to justify why there would be a Transylvanian-looking castle in New Jersey or something, but while it sounds like a massive undertaking it did happen on occasion! Pretty good article here.) The invaders are probably mummies, guessing by how hard they were to kill; then there's a legend about the location of another tomb, of Atun, Egypt's first pharaoh, who allegedly possessed the secret of immortality. Supposedly the secret was lost, but the ancient Egyptians had been imitating it after him, packing their tombs with "food and things the dead would need." Throw in territorial beef between the museum curator and an Egyptian cop: the former claims the tomb was bought legitimately, the latter rebukes that. 

Then, we get Mister Miracle, in another daring escape from the Eiffel Tower in a lightning storm...and then some more missing pages. Reading Haney is sometimes like reading comics blackout drunk, but I can't put that on him! Batman and Miracle are both in Egypt by page 8, albeit separately: Batman on camel with a guide, Miracle in a helicopter with a "gorgeous girl...(who) challenged my ego!" Pretty obvious she challenged Miracle to get into the lost tomb, although how she avoided Big Barda folding her into an envelope may be a more impressive escape. Miracle uses his anti-gravity discs to escape with the unfazed girl, then begin exploring the tomb; as Batman's guide turns on him, then collapses, and Batman begins investigating the tomb from the water. He had followed a bat-shaped clue, because of course he did.

Ooh, not a great scan there. Miracle and the girl, Ingrid, find the unaged pharaoh Atun in the tomb, where he announces he had returned seeking his people. Ingrid innocently asks about the secret of eternal life; when Atun says it's in his scepter, she grabs it and tries to yeet out of there, only to get herself and Miracle into a series of traps. Ingrid couldn't be more obviously evil if she had a mustache to twirl, but she also blurts out "by my master's life" as an exclamation, which seems totally normal. When Miracle says they've found the way out, she turns on him, and manages to get herself killed by one of her bullets ricocheting back at her. Miracle had lied, to get her to tip her hand, but finds his way to another "mummy case," containing...we don't get to see, as Atun returns, demanding his scepter; but Miracle defeats him and unmasks him as Batman! Unmasked, even, although he doesn't seem to mind: his costume had been in the sarcophagus. Feels like they stepped on the reveal there. Bats had been controlled by Atun's helmet...for reasons. I'm not missing a page here, I'm just not 100% on the why. 

Batman and Mr. Miracle are chased through the tomb by a weird beam, but manage to get to a small alien ship and escape. Outside, as the tomb is swallowed by avalanche and flooding, the ship and the scepter disintegrate, leaving no proof of anything. A few days later, Ingrid's boss, who apparently caused a lot of the ruckus searching for the secret to immortality, dies of old age; as the alien Atun is told by a tribunal of some kind that we know you love earth, but those primates couldn't handle immortality, and Atun agrees, never to return. Well, it's an efficient wrap-up, you have to give it that.

We may look at some of the reprinted features later, but that Time Commander story was from Brave and the Bold #59, and he somehow thinks sending GL to yesterday and Bats to tomorrow will somehow let him win today? It seems like a lot wrong with that idea.

Read more!

This one fixes what seemed like an error earlier, take my word for it.

I think I've mentioned before, I have a box of comics up at my parents' house that I probably re-read every year, which accounts for my annual re-read of Capwolf. But one of the other books in that pile is Captain Atom #20, guest-starring Blue Beetle. The Captain lies to BB's face there, presenting his bogus "covert casebook," a secret file of his adventures with the original Blue Beetle, Dan Garrett; together against the fictional Dr. Spectro. Although Beetle seemingly warms up to the Captain then, you don't realize at the time that he's playing along and knows it's a ruse: in that issue, Garrett has the Bug...

...but in today's book, it's revealed that wasn't an error on the creators' part, but a mistake on the Captain's government handlers' part in creating his cover story: Garrett could fly, he didn't have the Bug, Ted Kord had to build that himself! Catching the Captain in "a bald-faced lie," Beetle opts to let him keep digging.

While Beetle's pal Booster is in on this because he's Beetle's pal, he doesn't seem to trust Captain Atom either. Yet, it's Mister Miracle that brings evidence to their little investigation: he had scanned him with his Mother Box previously, and realized his silver coating was not from earth, which made his rocket-accident origin story unbelievable. All three have decided Captain Atom has to go; although they decide they can't go to Max Lord, since they figure he probably knew. I don't know why they didn't get Batman, except that would feel like tattling, and this gives them something to do.

Meanwhile, as USAF intelligence Major "Cameron Scott," the Captain has a new boss that he already likes better than General Eiling. He's put on the trail of whoever murdered a former North Vietnamese general, and realizes some of the names on the killer's list are known to him from his own court-martial in the 60's. Later trailing the suspect, the killer turns the tables on him, and recognizes him as his real identity, Nathaniel Adam. Captain Atom had fought the killer, in a suit of armor, in a previous issue; but their scuffle here is interrupted by Mister Miracle, who shuts him down with a massive electric shock, then nearly slaps Adam's fake name out of his mouth. I'm not sure I've ever seen Scott that steamed! Still, Adam can't let Miracle take the killer in, since he needs the clues to prove his innocence. Miracle agrees, if Adam will come clean, and he has to face his three angry teammates...

For years I thought Blue Beetle had been hoodwinked, or they had botched the Dan Garrett continuity that predated coming to DC, but it's cool to see they were playing a longer game! From 1989, Captain Atom #26, "Captain Atom: Exposed!" Written by Cary Bates, co-plotted by Greg Weisman, pencils by Pat Broderick, inks by Bob Smith.
Read more!

I wonder if I would've been more or less pissed off reading this month-to-month: as it stands, it feels like I've been in this storyline for fifteen years now, but that probably isn't the case. Maybe. Also, all space cops may be bastards. From 2010, Booster Gold #36, "This Man...This Chipmunk!" Written by Keith Giffen and J.M. DeMatteis, art by Pat Olliffe, cover by Kevin Maguire.

The Maguire cover makes this one look like it's going to be deadly serious, as Booster was still trying to put together the pieces of Maxwell Lord's plan, which no one else believed was a thing. He had made multiple trips back to his Justice League-heyday, and this month while Blue Beetle gets some with an alien queen; Booster, Mr. Miracle, and Big Barda are getting the hassle from a pair of Darkstars, who don't believe they were trying to disarm a planet-destroying weapon. The Darkstars had previously impounded said weapon and put a failsafe in it, then are about to get violent after they get the records on their "perps" from Apokolips. Mr. Miracle boom tubes them back to earth, then realizes they forgot Beetle, but Barda has had enough of "future boy's" nonsense. (A running gag: past characters claim they recognize future-Booster by the thinning hair, which he vehemently denies.) Barda says they had agreed to help Booster get the Book of Destiny, and unless there was something he wasn't telling them--like Beetle's future death--he didn't need their help. Booster tries to play on Barda's heartstrings, which not only gets him no help, it also gets past-Booster punched through a wall.

Booster has to return to the present to check in with the rest of his anti-Max team, in Justice League: Generation Lost, a 24-issue series with 49 covers that I have managed to not read a single one of. That goes poorly, so it's back to the past to save Beetle...who has been turned into a chipmunk by the spurned queen! I don't know if the planet is named this issue, but Queen Artemis has magic powers and the eye-antenna things the Legion's White Witch had. She claims the transformation is permanent, worse, before Booster can talk her out of the Book of Destiny, the Darkstars show up again and zap him! Beetle, Booster, and the Book are taken into custody, classified as "illegal combatants" and shipped off to Starlag. That name should ring a bell...

Booster and Beetle are in "another fine mess" verbal sparring, when they meet Vril Dox, who is not super-impressed with them. Booster realizes it's from Invasion! and that he really shouldn't discuss it with Beetle since it hadn't happened for him yet. Still, Booster knows Skeets will come for them, and the brave little 'bot is--but the gold-skinned Estrogina is making her break first!

This issue was cover-dated November 2010, and Generation Lost ran until June 2011? Giffen and DeMatteis may have stayed on until around then with BG #43, but I don't think it stayed 'bwah-ha-ha' the whole time...but Booster might not have made a lotta progress against Max Lord, either. There is an issue in there where Booster finally has to accept Beetle's death; I still haven't.

Read more!

I haven't read the most recent Mister Miracle series, although I've heard it might not be the most upbeat. So today we've got a more cheerful one! From 2012, Batman: the Brave and the Bold #15, "No Exit" Written by Sholly Fisch, pencils by Stewart McKenny, inks by Dan Davis.

Based on the animated series, this team-up opens with Batman conceding Mister Miracle to be the superior escape artist; but he's no slouch himself. They find themselves trapped in a featureless steel room, with no idea how they got there or where they are; but since they have all their gear it's time to start escaping. The heroes run a marathon of trap after trap after trap after trap...even without a lot of breathers, after day seven they may realize something isn't right.

Batman points out his cape was ripped in the first escape but isn't now; not to mention they haven't eaten or slept in all that time. It's all in their heads, courtesy of Dr. Bedlam and Desaad: Bedlam bails shortly after they wake up, while even Desaad is afraid of what Bats could do to him. Darkseid is mildly annoyed the heroes wouldn't break, and takes a shot at them with the Omega Effect, but Mr. Miracle is able to Boom Tube him and Batman back to earth. Batman wonders if Miracle might not be a spark of hope to the Lowlies or Hunger Dogs that witnessed their escape. Yeah, like Darkseid didn't murder the crap out of them immediately. Well, that's kind of a down note.
Read more!

I honestly thought this was going to involve time travel...

Ooh, so close to an 80-pager! From 2005, Justice League Unlimited #3, featuring "Small Time" Written by Adam Beechen, pencils by Carlo Barberi, inks by Walden Wong; "Escape from the Slab!" Story and breakdowns by Steve Vance, pencils by John Delaney, inks by Ron Boyd; and "Rolling on the River" Written by Steve Vance, pencils by John Delaney, inks by Ron Boyd.

In the lead story, the Atom discovers a microscopic invasion of the JLA watchtower satellite, and shrinks Wonder Woman, Ice, and Firestorm to help him fight it. (Firestorm has a fair question, "Couldn't we just, you know, step on them?" But there's a fair in-story reason.) Since none of them have shrunk before, Atom has to give them a crash course on the basics, like maybe don't eat a bean burrito before shrinking. Tiny vomit everywhere...

The "Johnny DC" kids books all had bonus pages this month; this issue reprints two shorts from Adventures in the DC Universe. Mr. Miracle gets forced to help a prison break, and Power Girl helps a harbor patrol cop with some hijackers stealing superweapons. The Miracle story is better, partly because it also features Big Barda and Oberon, as well as a recognizable host. There's also some coloring pages, and ads for a ton of games and Kangaroo Jack: G'day, U.S.A.!

Read more!

"The End" Week: Orion #25!

I had started a write-up for this issue earlier--it is one of my favorites on this list--but I could just say "It's Walt Simonson, it's awesome!" and call it good. From 2002, Orion #25, "Children of the Pact!" Written and penciled by Walter Simonson, inks by Bob Wiacek. (I don't usually note them here, but letters by the awesome John Workman, colors by Tatjana Wood.)

In New York's Central Park Metropolis's Centennial Park, Orion sits by the pond and feels a bit down. But not for long, as he is greeted by Scott Free, better known as Mister Miracle.

For those of you not up on your New Gods theology, Scott and Orion have a weird family dynamic: Highfather of New Genesis and Darkseid of Apokolips entered into a pact where they traded sons, the theory being that each having the other's son would guarantee peace. Darkseid was probably two steps ahead of the game, though: Orion has his dad's temper, and would have a hard time fitting in; while Scott was given to Granny Goodness and her orphanage boot camp and basically tortured for years until he escaped, breaking the pact. On the other hand, Scott ended up married to Big Barda, so maybe he did get the better end of the deal.

Now, here comes a somewhat game-breaking revelation: Scott has the Anti-Life Equation. In fact, he's always had it, since his days on Apokolips: after sneaking out of Granny Goodness's barracks one night, young Scott witnesses a massacre, Darkseid's dog soldiers attacking a slum of the wretched Hunger Dogs. Not knowing his power, Scott accidentally unleashes the Equation, first making the soldiers attack each other, then inadvertantly killing them all, soldier and peasant alike. Disraught, Scott clamps the Equation down, burying its power inside him.

I always felt like that's kind of a big retcon, and that it pretty much breaks Mr. Miracle as a character for further use; but it does add a lot of wrinkles that are interesting. Along with the implication that Highfather as much as gave Darkseid the Anti-Life Equation he'd been searching everywhere for; Scott, a character all about freedom, was now metaphorically shackled by guilt and responsibility. Moreover, Scott wonders how much his dad Highfather knew: did he know, and send Scott to Apokolips for training, seasoning he couldn't get on New Genesis, or as a weapon?

Still, I'm not sure this was ever brought up again; and it's at least a reboot or two back now. The rest of the issue is Orion getting his groove back: Scott is injured by a Parademon attack, on the day he takes flowers to the massacre site on Apokolips. (The Parademons weren't sent by Darkseid, though, but by Metron, who had some suspicions.) Disguised as Mr. Miracle, Orion takes the flowers, but this year Darkseid and Apokolips are waiting: Orion gives a pretty fair showing as Miracle, but then brings the pain when he reveals himself. "You, who were so bold when you thought you'd caged a tabby cat!" He demolishes a good chunk of Apokolips, before leaving the flowers in remembrance, and challenging his father anew.

Meanwhile, back on earth, Metron confronts Scott, having figured it out. Orion overhears and considers simply murdering Metron (who's often portrayed as nicer, but is somewhat ruthless in his pursuit of knowledge) but instead uses Darkseid's "temporal bender" to go back in time and erase the clues Metron found, leaving him in the dark...and altering the timeline so Orion's disguised visit to Apokolips didn't happen, but that's OK. He knows what he needs to do, now; and is grateful for his brother Scott's help.

Easily my favorite story with either Orion or Mr. Miracle. Orion has had a bit of a minor resurgence in the New 52, appearing in Wonder Woman and getting a sharp-looking new figure out of the deal.
Read more!

Winner Take Metropolis! ...perhaps 'Winner' should be in quotes.

Oddly, I think the last time I looked at a Mister Miracle comic, it had Superman in it too. But Miracle shows a bit more attitude than usual this time around, in 1979's DC Comics Presents #12, "Winner Take Metropolis" Written by Steve Englehart, pencils by Richard Buckler, inks by Dick Giordano.

After a dramatic televised escape in the Nevada desert, Scott Free is more than a little pissed to hear Galaxy Broadcasting was airing a Superman documentary at the same time, and he'd be lucky to get a 15 rating. (Which, if the ratings are the same today, would be more than twice last week's highest rated show?) Which also makes him wonder why he went through all the trouble of escaping from Apokolips, to what, do three shows a day at the Flamingo in Vegas? But his complaints are interrupted when he sees recent prison escapee/Intergang boss/hot pants enthusiast Carolyn Doyle, and follows her.

Doyle is checking out Intergang's newest invention, the Mentropy Machine, which can completely control minds in a fifty-foot radius, and should take care of Superman but good. As Mr. Miracle watches, they test the machine on an FBI snitch, leaving him unable to testify--he can't make himself say the words. Doyle suspects they're being watched, and they teleport out with the machine before Miracle can stop them. Even though he's jealous of Supes, he can't let Intergang kill him; but Miracle finds he was within range of the machine's effect and can't warn Superman! Scott is stuck, until he realizes he can't tell Superman, but he can challenge him, and begins a campaign to replace the Man of Steel in Metropolis!

Superman confronts Mr. Miracle on the issue, and Scott challenges him to a duel in the Nevada desert, loser leaves town. Lois asks Superman why he's bothering: "If you win, people will only say 'of course,' and if you lose, you lose everything you've devoted your life to!" Geez, don't oversell it, Lois. Still, Superman decides that beating Miracle would be both the fastest way to get rid of him, and send a clear message to anyone else who might coming gunning for his spot. Miracle seems to have more than got Superman's goat, but after the fight turns to fisticuffs, Miracle is eventually outmatched. After Superman starts to fly back to Vegas, the Intergang thugs are in position with the Mentropy Machine, but they weren't expecting the sudden appearance of Mr. Miracle, who smashed the machine. Scott is finally able to explain his game, and why he threw his match with Superman; although he's in no hurry for a rematch.

I'm more used to JLI-era, easy-going, cheerful, occasional house-husband Scott Free; but this one's a little more hungry for the big time.
Read more!

I know I had these two issues for a reason, but...

The blog's name is Random Happenstance, but it just as well could've been Faulty Headmeat Misfiring, since I'm not positive why I was thinking of these two issues for the same post. I think, on my walk home the other day (sometime in the last three months, since who knows when this'll be posted...) and was thinking about an issue I don't have handy: Justice League International #21, a fun Giffen/DeMatteis/Templeton romp with the team on Apokolips, and the return of Mister Miracle.

I think Mister Miracle is a character I like the idea of, more than any actual issues I've read of his. And I have the Kirby trade, and I've read a bit of his solo books, and some of the Morrison/Seven Soldiers version, and I loved his guest-spot in the last issue of Orion. (That last one will end up in "The End" Week one of these years.) And I think I still have the Steve Rude Mister Miracle Special from 1987 somewhere, too. It's not bad, but Rude's art there isn't as...lush as it was in Nexus. Or as animated as it was from this other book Rude did in 1987: from Comico, Space Ghost #1!

With Mark Evanier co-writing, Willie Blyberg on inks, and painted colors by Ken Steacy (!) Rude drops a love-letter to Hanna-Barbera's cartoon hero that reads like the extra-length episode you always wanted. A mysterious figure frees some of Space Ghost's greatest foes from intergalactic prison, including Zorak, Brak, and the Lurker; and the masked hero is going to have to run the gauntlet. Straight-forward, but super-fun.

Unfortunately, it's also square-bound, so it was a bear to cram in the scanner. Oddly, though, I think I have a spare copy of this bagged up somewhere from my college days; and that just makes me wonder what the distribution and sales were like for it...!

But, since I had been thinking of Mister Miracle, I also thought of this issue, also written by Mark Evanier, as luck would have it: Superman Adventures #42, "Living (Scott) Free" (Art by Neil Voker, inks by Terry Austin.) After a quick retelling of Scott's escape from the orphanage of Granny Goodness and Apokolips itself, we catch up with Mister Miracle trying to drum up publicity with daring escapes...that keep getting interrupted by Superman saving him.

Superman can't figure out why someone would willingly risk their life for nothing, but as Scott describes it as a celebration of freedom. Of course, Granny Goodness gets in on the action, planting a bomb on Scott's rocket-sled trick that will explode if he gets off, or crashes, or if Superman picks it up. Undaunted, Scott opens a boom tube to Apokalips, to "take a faulty product back to the manufacturer!"


This ish also features Big Barda, and some Parademons who use the "Pachydermatological Ray" to cause a ruckus at the circus, and is a lot of fun. Still, that doesn't really explain how my poor brain connected these two comics together, yet here we are.




Read more!

Because Mr. Miracle deserves a better class of villain.

Besides Granny Goodness and Darkseid and all, that is. Can you even name a Mr. Miracle bad guy that's not Fourth World related? Admittedly, fighting Darkseid would probably take up a lot of his time, but still, I think it would do him some good to be more involved in the regular DC Universe.

It would either be really fun or really annoying to watch a Saw movie with Scott, though, since that's a movie franchise tailor-made for him to yell advice at the screen. He'd probably be full of either helpful yet impractical advice, like how to breathe in and expand your chest before being chained up, or how to dislocate any of your fingers at will; or unhelpful impractical advice: "Use your Mother Box! Laser torch! Belt jets! By Highfather, do you want to die?!"

Links behind the bump!

We have actually seen a couple of non-Fourth World Mr. Miracle villains here; although I'm not sure if either were more than one-shots: Alianna and Cosimo. Alianna may have been more of an antagonist than straight-up bad guy, and Cosimo was from the Brave and the Bold, home of one-use-only villains. Over at his site, MightyGodKing may have rediscovered a Legion foe that would be a good match for Mr. Miracle.
Read more!

In my head, Starro sounds like Patrick from Spongebob Squarepants. Unfortunate.

Sorry, tiny today, so click to enlarge!

Look, if you walk around with a mace all day long, and work with Hal Jordan, I don't see how you could avoid hitting him the head at some point. Thanks again to Hoosier Journal of Inanity's Sea of Green, whose "My Pal Itty" strips gave me the Starro idea.

Under Grant Morrison, Starro became less of a crazy alien menace-of-the-month; and more a creeping, almost Lovecraftian dread. Not a bad angle, Starro as a vast, tidal intelligence, revolting and terrible. But my favorite Starro appearance (except maybe in the O-Squad, if he made that...) was in Justice League Europe. Starro passes himself off to "fellow alien" Kilowog as not a universe-despoiling conqueror, but as a creature that has been humbled and learned compassion, in the multiple sphincter-kickings he's received on earth. I won't go on now, except to say Starro takes over J'onn J'onzz before being defeated by the last Leaguer you'd expect.

And the DCUC "Shazam!" figure? Nice. I had no problems at all with Captain Marvel, and am thrilled. I'm not a huge Marvel Family fan, and never had a proper CM figure until now, but he's worth having. He'll be turning up again...

It is a little off-putting, though, to consider that these really sharp figures are be released at a time when these characters have either no, or vastly changed, appearances in current comic continuity. Isn't Billy Batson the wizard Marvel now, or some such? And Hawkman was killed, and Mr. Miracle isn't Scott Free and has a new costume. Even the Superman figure doesn't line up with the comics, unless you travel back to the 90's mullet days. Not sure about Kalibak (and haven't built him yet) but so far the closest figure to the character's current appearance, just might be Killer Moth, if he's not still a soulless moth-monster-man.

Maybe the DCUC are only being bought by collectors and fans who already know about the characters; or maybe Mattel is leaving it to the buyer's imagination. If little Timmy gets a Batgirl/Azreal two-pack, they can be heroes or villains, friends or enemies, noble or evil; whatever he wants. Of course, if Timmy likes the figures enough to check out some comics with those characters, he's in for a rude awakening when he finds that particular Batgirl's been paralyzed for years and Azreal is dead and forgotten. Yay, comics?

Well, Captain Marvel still has an all-ages book, so that's something. Which reminds me: how old is Billy Batson supposed to be now? Certainly not a teenager, right? I'm thinking ten, maybe; but went with eight since it's funnier there. I understand in JSA he was understandably attracted to Stargirl, since they're close to the same age; except it's really creepy to watch the fully-grown Captain hitting on the fourteen-year-old Courtney. Tough explaining that one to the casual onlooker. Or the rest of the Society. Read more!

Post #771: In which I have nothing to complain about...

Quite the opposite, in fact! In December, you may recall I donated some figures for Toys for Tots at the Comic Book Shop for Paul's contest over at Toy Bender! And, with the links, I just wrote this sentence like the end of a game of Clue for some reason...

And, I won second place! I got some Star Wars Order 66 two-packs, a Sideshow Bespin Luke Skywalker figure (here's a review from MWC Toys) and a $50 gift certificate to Big Bad Toy Store!

I attached the review because I'm not a 12-inch collector, and as such don't know much in that area, but that Bespin Luke is probably the nicest toy I've had...ever.

My BBTS order arrived Thursday: a Battlestar Galactica Helo (possibly still on sale in their Winter Clearance!) and DCUC Hawkman and Mr. Miracle! Now, Helo was just because he was on sale, I didn't have any BG figures and wanted to check one out, and I like that he was initially a character that was intended to be written off, and instead has managed to make it to the current episodes. Now that I have his figure, you can rest assured Helo is completely doomed.

But Hawkman and Mr. Miracle I was totally looking forward to. I already had homemade strips written for them, something I almost never do until I have the toys in hand. On the other hand, I was also sweating as their arrival date needed, since reports of Mattel's quality control problems have been making the rounds. Happy to say, both of them came out just fine.

It is only slightly ironic that I received Hawkman, the day after he (and Hawkgirl) were apparently killed, again, in Final Crisis. Why the Hawks? Couldn't kill a Flash again or something?

No, none of that today: today, let's have a big ol' thanks for Paul of Toy Bender and Big Bad Toy Store, and I of course encourage you to check them both out, they're awesome. Thanks again!

Read more!

Seriously, I hadn't been sure Mr. Miracle had ever got to 25 issues before.

I mentioned this one the other day, so let's take a quick run at it: Mister Miracle #25, "Doom unto Others...!" Written by Steve Gerber, art by Mike Golden, inks by Russ Heath. Pretty good lineup there: I always think of Englehart and Rogers as being the team of note after Kirby, so I wasn't expecting this. And, some of this issue actually reflects a little on the character of Scott Free even today.

The issue opens immediately after Scott Free has made a dramatic escape at Hoover Dam, but instead of his usual showman's bow, he gives a little speech about how forces in the universe will try to bind them, but "Escape is possible!"

Watching from Apokolips, Darkseid notes that Miracle is too unpredictable and dangerous now that he's "forsworn his allegiance to New Genesis." Did anyone else ever wonder, why did Scott have any allegiance to New Genesis? Sure, it's the land of his birth, and the ostensible good guys; but they're also the ones that traded him to Apokolips in a pact. I don't feel that he owes them the time of day.

Darkseid calls in the hit on Miracle, and Granny Goodness...man, I have never been able to work past that name. Granny sends a trio of fliers out, which Miracle takes out in a suitably dramatic encore. Although it's noted a couple of times already that Scott is working up his presentation as a messiah for the people, he points out in his interior monologue that it's "strictly secular." Best guess is it's not a faith-based initiative, but almost a 'live up to your potential' thing. I personally can't imagine anything more discouraging than getting a Tony Robbins speech from Criss Angel: "I broke free from this straitjacket, so can you!" Um, I don't have laser jets in my shoes, so no, I can't. Sorry to be so negative, but there it is.

As Miracle explains to his PR guy and the reader how he escaped--which I always thought was kind of boring, since it's usually blah blah Mother Box blah blah concealed laser blah reverse phase blah blah blah--the scene shifts to a family apparently seen last issue. A young woman, Alianna, displays almost supernatural physical discipline and control, to the dismay of her father. Her mother, however, is encouraging like a coach. An East German women's gymnastics coach, but that's still sort of encouraging.

Injured ten years ago in a car wreck, and still in agony to this day, Alianna developed (over-developed, if she's supposed to be a fifteen year old as noted in the dialog) incredible inner strength. The mom encourages it, seeing her daughter as what she herself could have become if she had received the chance and not married young. The dad points out his daughter is detached and emotionless, but his argument is trumped by Granny Goodness offering the mom "advanced tutelage" for Alianna. Yeah, even though she's trained Alianna for selfish reasons, the mom had a couple of good points, and probably isn't any more harsh a trainer than Batman, but siding with Granny pokes a big hole in her argument.

Granny sics Alianna on Mr. Miracle, who at first thinks she's as strong as his wife Barda. But, he soon realizes Alianna's real strength is an instinct for pressing weakness, "like a living trap!" She also proves strong enough to take a punch in the face from Scott, and beats him. Granny appears and scolds Alianna for not killing Scott, but Alianna calmly explains that wasn't her deal, and she prefers to compete against herself.

Granny begins to strangle Alianna, explaining that she could never be one of Darkseid's warriors, since pain is too useful in motivating them: Alianna is in control of hers, she's of no further use. Scott, playing possum, gives Granny an elbow to the gut, making it two women he's slugged this issue. Fleeing slowly via boom tube, Granny says Alianna's parents are doomed since she failed, and that if Scott's going to be a messiah, there's going to be an anti-Christ coming for him eventually.

Alianna was an interesting character, or could've been anyway, but I'm not even sure she appeared in the next issue, or how many more issues Mr. Miracle ran. Scott's run for messiah was never really clarified in this issue either: I figure he was probably trying to rally Earth against Darkseid, but it was probably dropped when this series ended. I'm more used to Scott as escape artist showman/work-a-day superhero, as he was in Justice League, than either this angle or the security/locksmith position he seems to have been shoved into since Identity Crisis or so.

By the way, Big Barda barely appears in this issue, and Golden doesn't draw her as 'big' as she probably should be; but between her design and Alianna you can see elements that would show up again in Micronauts.

Man alive, it feels like that's the first actual comics post I've done in a while. I haven't read Death of the New Gods yet, although I've read most of Kirby's Mister Miracle and New Gods, and have pulled a lot of the later attempts for both out of the quarter boxes. That's not to say there aren't some good ones in there, but as far as the whole Fourth World thing goes, I could get by with just Scott, Barda, Orion, Darkseid, and maybe Kanto. What? Kanto's cool.

Anyway, I think Justice League Unlimited was on the right track in blending those characters in with the larger DC universe. Otherwise, they're out by themselves and don't have the pull for it--remember Genesis? Not if you're lucky, you don't.

Tomorrow: a non-Marvel, non-DC, non-toy post! Weird, huh? Read more!

Can even Mr. Miracle and Big Barda escape...sexism?

With all the fuss lately about busts and comicquettes or whatever damn thing; I saw this over at Dave's Long Box (and elsewhere, but I saw it there last and it was the easiest place to get the picture!) and thought about it a bit.

Is Big Barda holding her husband Mister Miracle's cape as an act of subservience? Not bloody likely. Scott Free is secure in his masculinity and 100% on board with having a wife that can crush a Sherman tank until it can fit in a Coleman cooler. Besides, he has a midget manservent to do his ironing and so forth.

All right, is Barda holding his cape in a bit a showmanship, as Scott either begins or ends another daring escape? That would make more sense, but no! There's another reason, another sinister, creepy reason that none before had even dared to think of. Or occurred to think of. Anyway, sinister, creepy, Scott Free's terrible secret: He's a never nude, like Tobias Fünke on Arrested Development. The shame!

You know, Batman's right there, Scott. He probably has something on him to help you out. Like a massive sedative.

At this point in "Mile High Tombstone!" (from Brave and the Bold #138, written by Bob Haney, art by Jim Aparo) Batman and Mister Miracle have been captured by French acrobat, escape artist, "human rodent," and "human tennis ball" Cosimo. (Miracle calls Cosimo those last two.) Think Batroc the Leaper minus the mustache and less flash...and what does that leave you? Yeah, nothing. Cosimo is like an evil, embittered Cirque de Soleil refugee...yet another redundant phrasing there, sorry.

Miracle is drawn on later pages as wearing a diaper-like set of trunks, so Cosimo didn't strip him buck naked before throwing him in the net. (And what about Batman? I don't think Cosimo even took his utility belt, but Batman seems like he's waiting to see where this goes.) I don't know if it would matter either way, though; because I reckon Scott has...secreted multiple escape tools on his person. Probably hidden in his hair, or under fake skin, or swallowed. Where did you think? But Bat's and Scott's escape is profoundly disappointing:

Like most Brave and Bold villains, Cosimo was one use only, and gets blown up only 12 pages into the story. The rest of the story is spent outsmarting Kraken, the crime supercomputer, and escaping the deathtrap island Trond-hag. I'm not going to say it defies belief, but Mr. Miracle's instant helium balloon escape isn't even the most unbelievable thing in the issue.

So, now that you know Scott Free's unfortunate...condition...you can see the secret meaning of the Barda bust. I think, knowing the whole story, we can all agree there is nothing exploitative or sexist about. Nope. Not at all... Read more!