Friday, August 20, 2021

Somehow, still not blogging the issue you'd expect out of me.

But, I'm not sure I've read this one before. From 1983, Crystar #4, "Tell Me a Story, Daddy!" Written by Jo Duffy, pencils by Ricardo Villamonte, inks by Dave Simons. Cover by Michael Golden! 

As you might guess from the title, in the realm of Crystalium, two young siblings demand a bedtime story from their dad, who is somewhat inexplicably wearing a hooded robe and gloves in his kids' bedroom. They get a recap of the series to date, as brother princes Crystar and Moltar now wage a war for Order and Chaos, as they and their men have respectively been turned into crystal and lava men. The kids know the story, but want to hear it, and call out when dad tells it wrong, leaving out one of Crystar's captains, Kalibar--namely, their dad and our narrator.
There is a three-page interlude that Kalibar would not have known about and couldn't have seen, and certainly wouldn't have told his kids about: Moltar and his hot girlfriend Lavour (literally hot, in this case...) are wondering why some of their guys are chained up. Their benefactor, Chaos wizard Zardeth had chained them for twice failing to get Crystar (including once at Doctor Strange's Sanctum Sanctorum, if you can believe that!) and they've kind of had enough of being lava guys and ask to be made human again. Moltar and Lavour agree to release them from their service, and Zardeth obligingly returns them to human...in the middle of a lava pit, because that's what you get for failing Chaos. Zardeth is chillingly matter-of-fact about the execution; not even seeming to get a laugh out of it. Moltar seems to be becoming aware that he doesn't have any control over Zardeth, while the ambitious Lavour tries to keep the peace between them.
Later, Crystar receives word that Moltar and his men were approaching the throne city of Galax; and he and his captains rally against them. Warbow, in particular, puts one right through a lava man; before uncle Feldspar yells at him for attacking a "peaceful delegation." Moltar argued, Galax was his home as much as it was Crystar's, and the charges of attempted murder/regicide had never been proven. Feldspar was half crystal and half lava, in the spirit of neutrality and fairness, but takes it a bit too far here with the ruling that Moltar wouldn't have attacked the city before if Crystar hadn't been given refuge there, and orders Crystar and his followers banished. Ugh, I hate "both sides" crap...Crystar knows Feldspar's in the wrong, but has to admit they have to let Moltar attempt to make peace. (BTW, if you can read the recent Guardians of the Galaxy Annual with Hercules and the new Prince of Power; it's by-and-large a He-Man parody, but with a really good bit referencing Feldspar!)
Crystar's girlfriend and men make their goodbyes and prepare for exile: somewhat grimly, two men do so in the graveyard. The last, Kalibar, finally gets his kids to sleep, so he can spend a final night with his wife, before leaving the city, for who knows how long. 

This book never caught on, even though it's surprisingly readable for a toy tie-in. Better than some of the more popular toy books, I'd say. Well, I won't say, I don't want to get flamed on that one.

1 comment:

Mr. Morbid's House Of Fun said...

Crystar was definitely before my time, as I was waaay too young to even collect comics at the time this was out. I should probably catch up on the series though for the hell of it.
That GoTG annual too since you mentioned the He-Man parody bit.

The series, based on what you've shown on this blog so far, does seem pretty solid overall. The only other truly successful toy tie-ins worth mentioning would be Transformers, GI Joe (read both series religiously as a kid) ROM and Micronauts. I think that was it really. Right?