I don't think the Damage Control guys could...control my damage, around here; but today we've got the last issue of their third and final original mini-series: from 1991, Damage Control #4, "Cleanliness is Next to Godliness" Written by Dwayne McDuffie, art by Ernie Colón.

Clean-freak DC employee Rex Randolph accidentally handled a cosmic artifact at a clean-up site, which he used to turn himself into Edifice Rex. Galactus has sent the Silver Surfer to earth, to collect some of Damage Control for information: cheery Bart Rozum is having a swell time of it, while account exec John Porter is able stop screaming, eventually. They are taken before the "Cosmic Congress," a name I hope they don't use often; the usual big names like Lord Chaos and Master Order, the In-Betweener, Death and Oblivion, and Eternity and Infinity. All of whom seem to be a little snarky with the puny humans; why do we need to talk to them again? (Because like 99 out of 100 cosmic-doodad-weapons ends up on earth, duh.)

Summoned before the group, after doing Infinity's nails, Edifice Rex enlarges himself to equal status with Eternity and Galactus, to explain himself: the universe was basically one giant mess since the big bang, right? Just spreading like an orange juice spill on a clean countertop. Rex was going to clean it all back up, compress the whole universe back down into the cosmic egg, then maybe put it on a nice shelf or something. This sounds pretty terrible to everyone, except Master Order, who seems up for it. The big cosmic names seem unsure what, if any, action to take: fighting Rex could do more damage to the universe, or as foreman Lenny Ballinger points out, maybe they're just afraid of getting their asses kicked.

Earth's mightiest heroes are gathered (and the Punisher, who had met Damage Control before, because more cosmic events need a really angry guy shooting at them...) but John makes a suggestion to CEO Robin Chapel, who fires Rex. No longer a Damage Control employee, there was no longer any need for him to clean anything up; so that takes the wind out of his sails. And Damage Control gives out a lot of their cards, to the heroes as they leave.

Read more!

Until the relaunch last year, I hadn't read a single issue of this one! And I still don't have anywhere near a full set, but here's one: from 1990, Damage Control #4 (volume 2) "The Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. Affair" Written by Dwayne McDuffie, pencils by Ernie Colón, inks by Stan Drake and Marie Severin.

I read a lot of crossover books in 1990, so I'm a little surprised I slept on this; the last chapter for Acts of Vengeance! Large chunks of NYC had been trashed through a ton of super-hero fights, but the restoration firm of Damage Control was on strike! Both Wilson Fisk and Tony Stark had sold their shares of the company, when owner Mrs. Hoag was leaving to take a position in Washington D.C. on the Commission on Superhuman Activities. (Seen in a ton of issues of Captain America, among others.) Fisk and Stark both claim they weren't sure the company would survive without her; and Tony hadn't been keen on being in business with Fisk anyway. But Fisk had another reason...In Washington, shape-changer "Dittomaster" knocks out Henry Gyrich, then plans to force Mrs. Hoag to rubberstamp the majority report for the Super-Hero Registration Act: instead, she kicks the shape-changer's ass, since she's working with Nick Fury to retake her company! (Fury knew her when she was younger, and still seems taken with her; which is probably the most likeable he would be for most of that decade!)

Meanwhile, the Punisher was still watching current D.C. head Robin Chapel, since he had thought she was working for the Kingpin. Comptroller Albert Cleary, rightfully pissed at his new parent company, has worked out what their plan had been and how to counter it: they had bought the company, with a loan from Fisk, who was now squeezing them. Cleary offers them an out: sell Damage Control to Mrs. Hoag and S.H.I.E.L.D. for a bit of a loss, or explain things to the Securities and Exchange Commission and Fisk. Chapel confronts Fisk, severing his association with Damage Control, and unknowingly clearing her with the Punisher, who had her bugged. Probably the broadest joke in this one is towards the end, when they haul off the gaudy skyscraper that had been built over their headquarters in the Flatiron Building; as a certain comic book company was flush with money the summer of 1990 and wouldn't even have to change the initials on the building...

Weirdly, I don't think I've ever come across a full stack of any of these mini-series in the cheap bins: maybe people are hanging on to it. I even forgot there was a third miniseries in 1991--aw, Kyle Baker art in that one! Read more!