Is Impulse somehow a load-bearing piece of Legion continuity now? Grife, the future is in trouble...

We've blogged them in no particular order, but this is the last of the Legends of the Dead Earth annuals! And one of maybe two that was actually in regular DC Universe continuity at the time. Which, of course, means sprocking nothing nowadays...maybe. From 1996, Legionnaires Annual #3, "The Long Road Home" Written by Roger Stern, pencils by Charles (Chuck) Wojtkiewicz, Dan Jurgens, and Tony Castillo; inks by John Lowe, Don Hillsman, Dexter Vines, and Ron Boyd. Cover by Alan Davis and Mark Farmer!

I'd have to think pretty hard to counter this, but XS might be the last addition to the Legion of Super-Heroes that seemed to really stick? The Flash family legacy didn't hurt her, either: there aren't many Legionnaires that have appeared in live-action! But, today Jenni is stuck in 1996, after a time-travel mishap, and while she enjoyed getting to see her cousin Impulse and her grandma Iris, she wanted to get home, so Jay Garrick and 27th century Flash John Fox help her out with the Cosmic Treadmill. Which, as it sometimes did, fails her; as she lands further in the past (or, at least we would've assumed it was the past, then...) by her grandpa, Barry Allen! Who had been working on the Treadmill, to try and get some records back from his college dorm, which might be the most humanizing sentence I've read for Barry in ages. While Barry is glad to meet her, they both know she can't hang out, and Jenni is sad that she'd probably never see him again, as he helps her build up speed for the trip back to the future.

Unfortunately, this time Jenni overshoots, landing in the 100th century! Which is the fairly standard dystopia with robot enforcers, although they take an interest in XS as "unlicensed." She manages to avoid being 'downsized,' shrunken by the robots, but is captured and thrown in the 'Tombs,' advanced cells for earth's remaining super-powered individuals. The powerless heroes explain, the current overlord Nevlor had gotten rich selling "image enhancements," then got powerful enough to force those with powers to be licensed, or downsized, then replaced with younger knockoffs. There's some commentary here, it's subtle...As are the future heroes, who are variations on the Avengers, led by Gary Concord, the Ultra-Man! (Assume I said "not that one" here...) That's a callback to All-American Comics #8 from 1939! Gary had been a scientist, put in suspended animation in 1950, woke up in 2174, back in suspended animation here. Jenni is less freaked out about any of that, than the fact she was no longer on earth, but Almeer-5; and that earth (and the United Planets!) had been gone for centuries. (And, an aside: when I said it was subtle, I wasn't kidding: I thought it was just a jab at Image creators Lee and Liefeld on Marvel's Heroes Reborn, but 'Nevlor' is an anagram of Revlon, which owned Marvel for a bit! 'Almeer-V' is close-enough for 'Marvel' as well.)

At super-speed, Jenni is able to disable the bomb-collar on the Hulk-alike Behemoth, and then breaks out to buy time for Metallica and Avatar (again, not that...oh, nevermind) to get their respective gear, and Ultra-Man. The heroes have to fight their horrible replacements, and ask Jenni to stay and help form a new Legion, but she still wants to get home. Avatar lends her the Spear of Destiny (actually, yeah, that one!) to try and guide her through time: Jenni runs with it, to get going in the right direction, then lets it return to Avatar. But again, she finds herself even further in the future, at Vanishing Point, home of the Linear Men! Here, no one else can see her, even when her uncle Jay appears--mid-Zero Hour! Not a great day for Jay, as we see one of his JSA pals zorched in the background. The only one that can see Jenni, is a strange hooded figure, who describes himself as "Trapped" in "Time". Either Jenni slept through villain-identification at the Legion, or they hadn't run into the Time Trapper in post-Zero Hour continuity--if this was the same Trapper, or not, who could say? The Trapper does advise that time is not an absolute for ones like them, and also, the Linear Men suck: they tended to see things in black-and-white and probably would look down at her bouncing around time. The Trapper further reveals, he was responsible for Jenni's whole trip, to teach her something, which she won't be allowed to remember right now. Feels like that defeats the purpose, but sure. Jenni is returned to the 30th century, just a few weeks after she left, none the worse for wear. 

 I forget if this is still in continuity--probably not?--but pre-Flashpoint/New 52 Iris West was born in the 30th century but raised in the 20th. She would be killed by Reverse-Flash but brought back in a new body in the future, where she would have kids with Barry before he left to die in the original Crisis on Infinite Earths. (Said kids would be killed ignobly by the Dominators, in a brief back-up in the Five Years Later era.) Her grandson, Bart, was born with superspeed and aging super-fast, so she took him back to the 20th century to get help from the current Flash, Wally West. Jenni knew Bart: she had probably visited him in the virtual reality he lived in, in the 30th century. (Oddly, Brainiac 5 also knew Bart from the virtual reality, although was far less fond of him.) It's a lot of little dominoes to stack up to get to Impulse, who presumably existed around the time of the Legion; and he's back in current continuity more-or-less as his old self. I know every writer wants to do their own thing, put their own spin on it, but I'd keep XS in the Legion every reboot! I suggest just having her pop! out of the timesteam, and wonder what the grife happened there. Bonus points if she's still drawn in the cheery Jeffrey Moy style! 

Oh, and going through the tags again: the Starman Annual might have been in continuity, if the Shade is a reliable narrator; but I was thinking of the Power of Shazam one, since Thunder went back in time to join the Legion of Super-Heroes! And honestly, the Justice League America Annual could be in continuity as well, because that does seem like the other thing that routinely happens to Captain Atom. (Popping into the room, Captain Atom: "I made it! I'm back from the future!" J'onn, not looking up from his Chocos: "Uh-huh. And who was the bad guy this time?" CA, sheepishly: "...Booster." J'onn: "Uh-huh.")

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Five different covers, and the main characters in this issue aren't on any of them?

...did they have the title and the release slot, then had to write it?

I think I'm confusing Dark Crisis with Death Metal Trinity Crisis, mostly just because I bought them from the same dollar bins. This issue I can recommend, though! From 2023, Dark Crisis: Big Bang #1, written by Mark Waid, pencils by Dan Jurgens, inks by Norm Rapmund.

The opening is pretty stark, as the Flash--Barry Allen--stares at a hologram of the multiverse and announces "I'm looking for the man who murdered me." He explains to Kid Flash (Wallace) and the reader, that the "cosmic limitation" on the multiverse had been lifted (from 52, presumably) and now an infinite number of earths were there to be rediscovered. But, that also could mean the Anti-Monitor was out there destroying realities, and the Flashes head out in search of him. They zip through several universes, a neat little tour, before finding the Anti-Monitor hitting Earth-28, a mech-suit version of the JLA. Barry had just wanted to do recon, but when Wallace is grabbed he has to pull out one of his more dangerous tricks: run repeatedly around the world, accelerating to nearly-infinite mass, for a punch that knocks the Anti-Monitor across realities!

Barry keeps that up, repeatedly hitting Anti-Monitor and avenging his torture on the treadmill in the original Crisis; but A-M eventually grabs him. (The above page isn't just neat; it's also thematically appropriate, since Batman and the Joker were among the last to see Barry alive in Crisis!) It's all over for Barry, until Wallace shows up, with back-up gathered from all over the multiverse! Barry briefs them on the plan, to knock the Anti-Monitor into the anti-matter universe; but doesn't tell them that whoever lands the last punch to shove him in will probably get sucked in as well. Racing around the world again, his life passes before his eyes in an instant, but he's okay with it, and knocks the Anti-Monitor through...but is himself saved by the Batman Green Lantern! (I think that's from Batman: In Darkest Knight, although I can't remember if he had the bat-ears in that one!) I really like the ending, though, where Barry describes the multiverse as "a door to a place without limits." (Or, it can be like everyone you know, only as pirates or cowboys or dinosaurs or...) 

This is perhaps not unlike that Spider-Boy issue we saw a while back, that also walked back the destruction of some minor yet beloved alternates. Also this issue, after a tribute to Carlos Pacheco; Barry Allen's notes on the multiverse and the earths he had cataloged: Kamandi is back on Earth-51, Tommy Tomorrow on Earth-54, and I wonder if I can find a reprint or cheap copy of Adventure Comics #387. The cover doesn't mention it, but Earth-387 is described as "no divergences in history other than every inhabitant is a werewolf." Sounds fun!

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I really expected more garter belts in Howard Chaykin's Justice League.

Well, they're all business in these issues, so maybe not. From 2006, JLA: Classified #26, "Secret History, Sacred Trust, part one" Written by Howard Chaykin, pencils by Kilian Plunkett, inks by Tom Nguyen.  

I think this was pretty concurrent with the JLA book at the time, with the Grant Morrison core team: the most seasoned of professionals, if a bit detached. They were like an encounter with a really good paramedic: if you need them, you're probably confused, helpless, and having the worst day of your life; but for them it's just Tuesday. They'll take care of you, but won't get all worked up about it.

Plotwise, this is both pretty solid and almost specifically what you would expect from Chaykin: two South American countries were on the verge of war, but both sides seem to somehow have put metahuman soldiers into the field. The JLA has to thread the needle between doing the right thing, and not overly imposing their will on foreign nations, while maybe also figuring out where the metahumans came from and not seeming too pro-America. Despite having two aliens and two monarchs on the team, they still work more closely with the U.S. government than you would probably expect; which feels real post-911 but also hopefully isn't rushing back. It's also completely not-surprising that the President is concerned about any other countries "using metahumans for international terrorism" yet being A-OK with America having them.

From Joe Kelly's run, Faith makes an appearance here, returning from the warring countries "on a mission I can't discuss for an agency that doesn't officially exist." (I honestly forget what her powers were, and I think she was traded to the Byrne-era Doom Patrol, which really feels like getting sent to the minors.) While in the field they might have been a unified front, the League seems a little back-bitey here: Kyle and Wally are seen by some of the others as a bit like children, American simpletons who don't really understand the rest of the world, no matter how many times they've saved it. (...fair.) Later, playing the king card, Aquaman throws a wrench in things, by insisting the President and the JLA make their case to the United Nations; where things get dragged to a halt by the objections of the Dutch ambassador. (Are her complaints legitimate, or somehow sinister? Maybe both, really.) While the JLA is officially ordered to stay out of the conflict, Faith takes Bruce, Clark, Kyle, Wally, and Diana undercover; on Mission: Impossible rules: if you're caught, no one's ever heard of you... 

This storyline would run through JLA Classified #31, and while I was able to get the whole thing from the dollar bins recently, I don't think it's been collected. Later in the story, J'onn plays one-man JLA to make it look like the others were where the world expected them to be; Kyle is effective undercover at a comic-con while Wally seems really bad at clandestine stuff; and the JLA honestly seems to get along pretty well regardless of if they're sometimes irritated or annoyed by each other.

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I remember a house ad for this, wonder if it's in the issue?

This was a 68-pager, and while I don't think it was the first in this format, it was part of multiple revamps for the title. From 1979, Adventure Comics #463, cover by José Luis García-López.

The opener, "Urtumi the Image Eater" is an oddball one for the Flash, as returning from Earth-2 he's attacked by a bizarre creature, which had been released when archeologists removed a Native American tablet. (Story by Cary Bates, pencils by Don Heck, inks by Joe Giella.) "Mind over Murder!" is a bit more substantial, as Deadman tries to use a somewhat-unhinged scientist's invention, to create a new body for himself. It doesn't work, and Boston continues to get irritated by Rama Kushna, who tells him that would never have worked, and he should be grateful for what he has, because he might have it for eternity...I think Rama was trying to be encouraging, not threatening, but Boston doesn't really see it that way. (Written by Len Wein, pencils by José Luis García-López, inks by Frank Chiaramonte.)

"The Night of the Soul Thief" opens with the Justice Society on the trail of Batman's true killer, and both Dick Grayson and Helena Wayne are unmasked, as their secret identities had been exposed in the wake of Batman's death. The team fights assorted elementals, before being taken before one Fredric Vaux, a sorcerer plotting to end the current age of heroes, so the ongoing conflict of Order vs. Chaos could get back on track, with Chaos victorious and him ruling earth in its name. Vaux had wanted to erase even the memory of the heroes, but too many people in Gotham City remember Batman for that to go away easily. Helena is furious that her father died for nothing, a pawn in a larger game; but on losing Vaux is discarded by Chaos and seemingly done. Doctor Fate then uses what was left of his spell, to convince Earth-2 that Batman and Bruce Wayne had both died, but had been separate men, saving Robin and Huntress's identities. (Written by Paul Levitz, pencils by Joe Staton, inks by Dave Hunt.)

"Climax" is an Aquaman story, and I may need to take a moment to see if he (or Flash or Wonder Woman, for that matter) had his own title at the time: I feel like I've read several Aquaman stories in Adventure. This month, it's Aquaman vs. Aqualad, Mera, Vulko, most of Atlantis, and capitalism! Universal Food Products had entered into a manufacturing partnership with Atlantis, which everyone thought would be good for everyone; except for Aquaman, who had discovered UFP's generators were heating the sea to unlivable levels, while their fertilizers were going to deplete Atlantis's farmland. Or farm-waters; I'm not sure how it works. Arthur wasn't currently the king, and everyone seems to think he's just being stubborn; but come on: the UFP guys had a boat commander in a very Nazi-style uniform, with a friggin' monocle. Pretty sure they're the bad guys, man. Aquaman exposes them, but admits to his friends he didn't blame them, since he didn't have any proof backing him up. Feels like a trust exercise they failed, though. Also, is it my imagination, or despite having less rep Aqualad threw down with his mentor more often than Robin or Speedy did with theirs? Yeah, Robin would've been a good soldier at the time; but I guess Speedy and Ollie probably rough-housed all the time. ("Put down the needle, Roy!" "Make me!" "Put down the chili, Ollie!" "Make me!") (Written by Paul Kupperberg, pencils by Don Heck, inks by Joe Giella.)

Bees. My god. It's Wonder Woman vs. "The Insanity Swarm!" Intelligent bees attack the Houston space center, leaving those stung as mindless and comatose. It's old JLA baddie the Queen Bee, who, when wrapped up in Diana's magic lasso, explains she had taken their minds, but even the lasso couldn't force her to give them back: she had set the self-destruct to prevent even her doing so. But, if Wonder Woman became her slave, then maybe...(Written by Gerry Conway, pencils by Joe Staton, inks by Frank McLaughlin.) 

 This was around DC Implosion time, wasn't it? But, there is a US Postal Service Statement of Ownership this issue: total paid circulation, single issue nearest to filing date, 91,693. As usual, those would be blockbuster numbers today, but I don't think were amazing for the time, maybe even for a bimonthly book. Still, this didn't have a copy of the house ad promoting it; not because it would've been redundant, but this book was no ads at the time! I'll add said ad the next time I stumble across it.

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A chosen one, and people in pods used as batteries? I can't believe this predates THE MATRIX by three years.

Also, I haven't seen 28 Years Later yet, but the previews give away a priest losing it and opening the doors to the rage zombies, which I feel like was a beat before in those films? But then, when I see a priest or organized religion in sci-fi, I usually assume the worst. Today, well, yeah, pretty much: from 1996, Flash Annual #9, "Silent Running" Written by Peter J. Tomasi, pencils by J.H. Williams III, inks by Mick Gray.

This was, of course, another of the "Legends of the Dead Earth" annuals; and finds a world deep in the throes of an ice age. The remaining people seemed to have a bit of technology, but that wasn't going to keep them afloat much longer, but they had faith. Namely, a Flash-based religion, that rather surprisingly doesn't specifically name Saint Barry, but does have a Book of Iris. The lightning, speed force, "flash of light," whatever, seems like it was trying to do something, but in mysterious ways: true believer Stevan Mallory survives the cold pilgrimage to get struck by lightning, which ages him but may show him the future. He encourages his firstborn son Bryan, who shares his Flash-logo scars, to heed the call of the lightning, which Bryan doesn't really believe. His jealous brother Tristan does, though: he's the creepy, culty, fire-and-brimstone style preacher; who carves his own Flash-logo into his chest before killing his father. Bryan and Tristan get into a fight at Stevan's funeral--which, since the ground was too frozen for burials, is basically dropping the corpse into a hole--but then start their own journey.

Tristan goes snowblind, the brothers are attacked (...or are they?) by a somehow familiar creature, but eventually make it to get struck by lightning themselves. Which heals but ages Tristan, and accelerates Bryan into a blur. While Tristan howls at being forsaken, he notices under the still-unconscious but vibrating Bryan that grass was growing again. Tristan then beats his brother to keep him out, and starts a new age, which was moderately better for the people: they lived on average to the age of 50 now, in a warm domed city. Meanwhile, while preaching the lightning gospel or whatever, Tristan was also sucking lifeforce out of the people to turn himself younger at regular intervals, as well as enslaving Bryan and other newly discovered speedsters in pods to keep the city going. (The lightning kept not giving Tristan powers, keeping him resentful and weird.)

One of the flock, a bald young woman, Deborah, finally can't take Tristan's reign anymore, and feeling sorry for the sad-but-pretty Bryan, frees him. Escaping Tristan's goons, Bryan vibrates them through a wall, and they end up outside, in the water, which is full of bodies of those sacrificed by Tristan. They are saved from drowning by a mysterious traveler, who gives Bryan the Flash's costume, frozen in ice. They realize it was J'onn J'onzz, who leaves it to them: he was returning to Mars, probably to die. Bryan then fights it out with Tristan, who has donned golden armor and brandishes a Flash-logo staff: the fight lasts about three pages longer than it probably should, but ends with Tristan falling down the grave hole, telling his brother he wasn't sorry. "I was fated to create a world, as you were to serve it."

Fifty years later, Deborah reads the story to children, who seem more interested in if she and Bryan ever hooked up. The people were happy and peaceful, and she looks on sadly, as Bryan still runs...or whatever...in his pod, to keep the city going. 

Again, the Speed Force works in mysterious ways, its wonders to behold...? Or, it's basically lightning, and probably a mistake to ascribe any sort of human motivations or reasoning to it? Stevan seems to realize his fate, killed by his weirder kid, as part of some grander scheme; but it feels cruel. That and Tomasi might be playing with the idea that the Flash is at its core the platonic ideal of a life of service to others. Or a joyless slog. Maybe both. I also feel like the brotherly hate angle is something that the reader should recognize, but I don't offhand. A Cain/Abel thing, or another Bible reference? I could be wrong there. though.

This maybe gets us to 16 of the 25 Legends of the Dead Earth annuals! How many of the rest are going to be just brutal to find...Off the top of my head, I know there's a Aquaman one that seems to be set in a future desert, and maybe a Guy Gardner/Warrior annual that's largely "Guy's descendants are all awesome, Hal Jordan's are all dicks." 

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The continuity hadn't gone out the window yet, and that might be the one costume that looks better on a guy?

From 1984, All-Star Squadron Annual #3, written and edited by Roy Thomas, researched by Dann Thomas, and a whole mess of artists! Jerry Ordway, Rick Hoberg, Rich Buckler, Wayne Boring, Richard Howell, Carmine Infantino, Don Newton, Marty Nodell, George Pérez, Keith Giffen, and more!

Huh, I had thought the Golden Age Tarantula had been a later addition; but nope, he first appeared in 1941! He's probably best known to modern readers as getting killed off in Nightwing, and his successor would...um...do stuff to Dick; but back in the day he became a costumed mystery-man as part of his research into his heroes for a later book. I think his costume was maybe altered or updated by Jerry Ordway though, and it's pretty good; but this issue he gets tripped up on a metal lockbox while pursuing Nazi saboteurs. (Aside: I used to think Nazi saboteurs in WWII-set comics was just the hokiest thing in the world; that there were more in comics than there ever could've been in real life; but lately...) Tarantula is saved by Wonder Woman, and together they investigate the case, which contains an illegible list of names, some newspaper clippings, and references to the Justice Society! Wonder Woman doesn't recognize the photos there, so they take it to her Amazon "magic sphere" back at their Perisphere headquarters. The sphere begins by showing them a JSA meeting, from a year prior, as the team was trying to raise a cool million for war orphans, and razzing Johnny Thunder a bit for dropping the ball: he'd managed to stop some thugs posing as Atom and Sandman, but admitted his Thunderbolt wasn't good with financial stuff. Still, if only their honorary members Superman, Batman and Flash chipped in...and the Thunderbolt delivers them, with $100,000 each!

Green Lantern and Dr. Fate go to deliver the cash to President Roosevelt himself; with Fate saying he had sensed "strange emanations from our nation's capital (sic)." (That should be capitol!) They find shadow-men threatening the president, and shut them down: they had been sent by old JSA foe Ian Karkull, who had previously been reduced to a literal shadow of himself. The shadow-men burst into flames, but GL is able to pull a charred list from the flames: nine other locations, each with a JSA foe. Fate sets a "24-hour protective spell" about the "Executive Mansion," and he and GL race back to JSA headquarters in Gotham. Most of the team then heads out to face their old foes, with Johnny Thunder and GL in reserve. Meanwhile, Ian Karkull likewise puts his forces into the field, promising each one that completes their mission a $100,000. The Tarantula on his team wasn't the same one; and it's weird to see Catwoman with the realistic cat mask; otherwise Wotan was the only one I recognized.

Superman of course has to save Lois Lane, after her plane gets shot down by the Lightning Master, who is about to destroy a hospital for his payday. Supes thinks he should be able to walk through his electrical weapons, but the "new and improved" version gives him pause; until he gets an assist from Johnny Thunder and his Thunderbolt! Elsewhere, the Hawks stop Alexander the Great, the Spectre stifles Zor, and the Atom and Sandman clobber Tarantula; all before they could attempt to carry out their assassinations. Flash, and his future wife Joan, have an only-slightly harder time with Sieur Satan; but Joan also demands she get to come with him. Batman and Robin chase Catwoman in Hollywood, but she takes out another hitman instead, unwilling to become a killer. Green Lantern faces Wotan, but while the villain is thrown back into another dimension, his last stray shot clips a tree, knocking it over onto a child, killing them. GL isn't sure that kid was Karkull's target, but is furious to find out.

Hourman faces Dr. Doog in Georgia, where he plans to electrocute a good chunk of the countryside to get his target. Despite struggling with Miraclo side-effects, Hourman had been forced to take two pills back-to-back, but he gets an assist from Doog's old foe, Starman! He had seen Hourman go in, and wanted to apply to the JSA. Finally, Dr. Fate saves a small boat from a freak storm, then confronts Karkull, who has set a trap for him, in a house made out of flesh...! Fate summons the JSA for help, getting the entire team, plus Robin, Lois Lane, Joan Williams, Hawkgirl, and Starman. The heroes with ray powers zap Karkull, while the Spectre senses other souls within him. Karkull grows to giant-size, but the Spectre matches him, and Karkull bursts, showering the assembled heroes in a weird light. (A color plate seems off here; I wonder if all copies had this?)

Fate and the Spectre believe that Karkull had "stolen time" somehow, and his demise would prolong the lives of those present, or maybe just make them "more vital" while they lived. That feels like a good start for the rookie Starman, but Hourman and Green Lantern both have to take leaves from the team, and Dr. Fate follows suit: he had to determine if he was in charge, or Nabu. The JSA opts to keep this case a secret, which is why it was news to Tarantula and Wonder Woman--she wouldn't join until months later. Tarantula agrees to honor the Society's wishes and keep this under his hat, although he doubts Karkull was on to anything with his targets...eight of whom would later become President of the United States! Figuring out where each would have been on or about June 28, 1942 would've taken a bit of research.

Along with a bit of fun for a jam issue, Roy Thomas had intended this to patch a few continuity issues: Green Lantern's very brief tenure as chairman of the JSA, Hourman's leave of absence, Dr. Fate's changing helmets and powers; as well as the heroes' long-lives and vitality past what would usually be expected for their ages.

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Not everything that happens three times is terrible, but...

Everything is circling the drain as I write this, sure; but you would be appalled at the litany of profanity I let out the other day, when I found I had three of this issue, and by rule if I buy the same damn comic three times, I have to blog it. From 2019, Heroes in Crisis #6, "Who is Saved?" Written by Tom King, art by Clay Mann and Mitch Gerads. 

 

I didn't read this when it first came out, since opinion seemed pretty divided; and because DC burned me once with Identity Crisis. Short form: Superman, Batman, and Wonder Woman have set up Sanctuary, a facility for heroes (and possibly villains) to recover from post-traumatic stress and other psychological problems. I'm not sure it's seen before this series, but doesn't matter, as it's wrecked here, and several heroes are murdered. The victims range from C-listers like Blue Jay or Commander Steel, up to Arsenal and Wally West. Booster Gold and Harley Quinn are the only survivors, or one might be the murderer; and someone has leaked the story to the press. 

 

This issue follows Wally, Harley, and old Teen Titans member/unfrozen cave guy Gnarrk through their therapeutic journeys. That's not really Gnarrk's origin, at least pre-Crisis (on Infinite Earths!) but close enough; and in fact Gnarrk mentions being frozen as he reminisces about life back in the Stone Age, but with a surprising amount of philosophy. (Seriously, Gnarrk's journey is interesting! "In old day, death always there. So Gnarrk worry about death. New day, life always there. So now, Gnarrk worry about life.") Harley wasn't supposed to be there, but had snuck in to be with Poison Ivy; and was maybe making some progress in dealing with Joker-related trauma. And Wally West...after various continuity resets, he was back, but without his wife and kids. All the other heroes, Barry, his friends in the Titans, were overjoyed to see him again; but nobody seemed to notice how much he missed them. (Or at least that's how it seems to Wally in those scenes. Wally's continuity was just a disaster; there were a couple of them for a while, too.)

This issue, by itself? Maybe not bad. But, spoilery discussion after the break.

  OK, you probably already know, and an earlier issue had Booster point out a clue: the murderer was Wally West. He didn't believe the other heroes there were 'real,' or really had problems; it had to just be him, right? He cracks the security on Sanctuary's systems and watches everyone's files, and all of that on top of his existing trauma breaks him. He accidentally kills everyone (except Booster and Harley) at super-speed, then when he realizes what he had done, he stages the crime scene, uses virtual reality to convince Booster and Harley that the other had been the murderer, leaks the documents and leaves the clues and makes arrangements for his past self to kill his future self? Not unlike Identity Crisis, Occam's razor goes right out the window here. 

All of this was seen by a lotta fans as character assassination of Wally; and yeah, probably: King does a good job setting up Wally's distress, not as good a job on the murders/coverup. And because comics, all of it would be walked back, pretty much exactly like Hal Jordan's breakdown was blamed on Parallax: Wally's breakdown would be the fault of Savitar.

While Poison Ivy would be regrown from a rose she gave Harley, all the other heroes killed would be saved later, in Flash #796. (Good, because if my boy Nemesis stayed dead, I would be pissed.) Wally would get his wife and kids back somewhere, too. Which undermines what King had maybe been trying to say about trauma: sometimes, things don't come back. But maybe a superhero comic isn't the best place to say that...or maybe not in that way? Like, superheroes would absolutely have trauma; but how they would have to deal with it would be almost completely unrelated to how regular people have to. Maybe. 

I didn't love the rest of the series, but there are moments? King writes Booster as just dumber than a box of rocks, but he and Beetle are great together. I feel like Harley was there because she was popular, but if you make too much headway towards wellness with her, she's not as Harley as people like, so she gets stuck. Thematically, both Wally and Booster seem like they're trying to keep up a brave face, even in therapy; because they can't seem to articulate "things are messed up and I'm not okay with it" and they think that's what heroes are supposed to do. The confessional style panels are interesting, but some of them just become jokes, like the various Robins wondering where they fit in, or they might be more about what King thinks of the character and other writers or continuity might disagree. It also feels telling that Wonder Woman, Black Canary, and Catwoman are all seen as largely blowing off that style of help. Tom King frustrates me: some moments shine, but the overall experience doesn't. I liked his Omega Men series, but am hesitant to re-read it, since I think it's "here's a bunch of terrible things happening, when they're over no one is helped or better for the experience, now live with it." Admittedly, that feels like the mindset of the moment, but still. 

BTW, I accidentally bought this three times--getting both covers, which doesn't happen every time--but still paid less than cover price.

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I feel like she should have glasses, can't put my finger on why...

We've seen him on the blog a few times (mostly as a crowd filler in Serpent Society strips!) but I've always felt DC should do more with him. Even if modern readers would doubtless assume it was a riff on G.I. Joe. From 2003, Justice League Adventures #23, "Venomous Agenda" Written by Christopher Sequeira, pencils by Min S. Ku, inks by Rob Leigh. 

Of course, you have to somehow establish Kobra as a threat capable of not immediately getting crushed by the Justice League; something Kobra himself almost seems aware of. He usually spent two weeks a year disguised as one of his followers--like a more evil Undercover Boss, which would just be Undercover Boss--but has to call it early this time, as he's heard doubts in the rank-and-file, and needs to let them, and the world, know the score. A couple weeks later, Flash stops a basic bank robbery in Central City, then gets shivved by the bank manager! It's Kobra in disguise, hitting Flash with "electrified nano-particles" designed to keep him out of action for days. He then challenges the rest of the League on TV, reveals his Ark ship, and poisons a bunch of people with nerve gas. Batman and Superman investigate, and find a holographic message, with Kobra calling out Green Lantern and Hawkgirl, to face him and his second, the Baroness--er, Lady Eve, at the Grand Canyon, or he'll blow up a cannister of nerve gas already planted in a schoolyard somewhere.

Regular TV reporter Snapper Carr is already on the scene; and Lady Eve wonders if Kobra should be revealing his organization, but he claims "the media-hungry world needsss a lessson." While GL and Hawkgirl are able to wrap up the pair, Kobra still gets them with a blast of nerve gas, then teleports out, with the reporters as prisoners, and claiming the heroes would die in 24 hours. Superman and Wonder Woman had found the schoolyard gas cannister, but it was empty: they still didn't have a sample to try and make an antidote. Kobra then confronts the team in their own Watchtower headquarters, able to disable the Martian Manhunter with his own mental discipline, and the Ark hacked the Watchtower's systems. His next challenge: Wonder Woman and Superman, versus Kobra's elite troops, at the Colosseum in Rome! Or, he'll launch two separate missiles full of nerve gas. Still, Batman has realized Kobra's error: he saw the League as stereotypes, only taking into account their most surface powers.

Superman and Wonder Woman fight well, but eventually go down under a high-tech blaster barrage. Batman then challenges Kobra himself, one-on-one, no weapons, casually dropping his utility belt as he taunted him. Lady Eve advises against it--he had everything to lose, and nothing to gain--but Kobra's ego won't let that go. After a solid fight, Batman has him, and Eve has to intervene for her boss, trying to spin it as "the ways of the snake lead to victory!" Batman is down, but not beat, and tells Kobra so: even if he did fall, the Flash and the Manhunter would be back, or regular people would stand against him. "No one believes in you."

Furious, Kobra launches his missiles, which Batman had been waiting for: he had Superman and Wonder Woman playing possum, and WW plays to the camera as she smashes the Ark up. Flash had been tracking the missiles through dozens of weather and surveillance satellites, and could feed the trajectories to the Manhunter, to telepathically update Supes, who takes both missiles out. He saves the nerve gas, though, to make an antidote. Even wrapped up in Wonder Woman's magic lasso, Kobra still orders his troops to attack, but Lady Eve declines, refusing to sacrifice any for him; planning on bringing the cult back under her leadership. Kobra ends up in maximum security, although without his trademark hood he looks like Lex Luthor! 

I still don't have all of this series, which is mildly disappointing, but just means there's still some out there yet to be read. Previously, we've seen the last issue, #6, and #30; although we probably saw some of the later Justice League Unlimited as well.

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This one has kind of a striking cover--it got me from a spinner rack in the comic shop! Although I'm almost positive the cover was done first, then the story backfilled. From 1971, Flash #206, "24 Hours of Immortality!" Written by Robert Kanigher, pencils by Irv Novick, inks by Murphy Anderson.

Two people are on their own races against time here: single mom pilot Susan Logan is trying to get to the "Sky Devils Circus" to compete for a $50,000 prize, with which she plans to guarantee her son Timmy's college education. The kid is like six, and doesn't seem like a budding genius; there's probably other ways to do that besides killing yourself? Meanwhile, on the ground, neurosurgeon William Xandel and his wife Sylvia are on their way, for him to operate on a cancer researcher, that was working and put the operation off to the last minute. Susan's plane crashes into William's car, and Timmy and Sylvia are killed. Fortunately, there are some helpful...ish? aliens, who offer them the supreme test: they'll bring back Timmy and Sylvia, if Susan and William sacrifice themselves. They agree, and the aliens say they will return in 24 hours: until then, Susan and William were immortal.

The aliens repair Susan's plane and William's car, and send them on their way. William wants to bag out of the surgery, to spend more time with Sylvia, but she refuses: the cancer researcher might be close to a cure, and he had to save him. He catches another bit of bad luck, though: two slugs from some escaping convicts! Flash captures the convicts, then is amazed at William's story; and assists in the surgery to free up some more time for him with his wife. Flash wonders about the other temporary immortal, who was currently dismayed that the Circus might be cancelled because of a forest fire. Flash stops the fire, saving Susan's plane again; then she competes in the circus, finally winning by jumping from a plane and landing without a chute, which should have reduced her to a chunky living paste, but the aliens maybe covered her on that one. Kinda feel like she cheated a bit; but Flash is determined to save William and Susan, and was willing to fight for them. The aliens try to kill Flash three times--which could be significant, or could just be how much time was left in the story--before recanting, allowing William and Susan to live. Presumably, not immortal and indestructable...probably.

Also this issue: the Elongated Man faces a "Showdown in Elongated Town!" Story by Cary Bates, art by Dick Giordano. In a strangely distorted old western town, E-M finds himself in a showdown, with one of Flash's foes--I won't say who!--who wants to kill E-M as practice for waxing the Flash. Actually, that's not entirely correct: he's also going to use Elongated Man's corpse as bait, which makes more sense. I couldn't figure how the skills to kill E-M would carry over to killing Flash... Read more!

Barry runs up a beam of light, and that's not even the most unbelievable thing this issue.

My big hang-up was why would a master of disguise wear that outfit, but that might just be me. From 1980, Flash #291, "The Saber-Tooth is a very Deadly Beast!" Written by Cary Bates, art by Don Heck.

I feel like everything in this issue is Bates maybe trying to do things that hadn't been done before in this long-running title, so it seems like trying to reinvent the wheel over and over, while trying to roll at the same time. This opens with Fiona Webb, about to be murdered by Barry Allen: 'Fiona' wasn't her real name, and she hadn't been around long; this was probably the end of her first storyline. The fake-Barry was Ross Malverk, a mobster Fiona had worked for but testified against; she had started a new life in witness protection, but had been afraid of Barry in error. The Flash finds himself in a bind, though: with 'Barry' wanted for attempted murder, he didn't have an alibi, since he'd been Flash at the time. He's able to get some help from King Faraday, after saving his helicopter after a bazooka hit, in a really improbable vibrate-and-run-on-dust-particles trick.

There are two hitmen, seemingly subcontractors, who shoot a lot of bazooka shells over Central City: I feel like those weren't super-common. Malverk gives himself up, to get protection from Saber-Tooth, who he had previously double-crossed; Barry lets himself be seen in public to draw him out. I don't think Saber-Tooth usually wore that outfit: he says he lifted it from a tailor shop, because why wouldn't a tailor shop display...that? He then tries to kill "Malverk" with, I don't know, a superball firebomb? It seems like the generic of a Green Goblin pumpkin bomb. Flash then appears, and Saber-Tooth nearly escapes in a jetpack with optional chemical smokescreen; but unfortunately that time of night was empty, so Flash could just run around punching until he got him...look, I don't buy it either, but it was the last page, so...Fiona forgives, and is happy to see Barry: she'd be his new love interest, after the death of Iris, for most of the rest of the series.

Also this issue: A Firestorm short, with George Perez art!...that gives away the game in the title, "The Hyena Laughs Last!" Written by Gerry Conway, pencils by George Perez, inks by Bob Smith. Ronnie Raymond has got Professor Stein a job interview, and off the sauce: for quite a while, Stein didn't get to remember what happened to them when they formed Firestorm, so he had a bunch of unexplained absences and mental lapses; but was starting to recover. Ronnie gets several Ditko-era Spider-Man plot points, as his main antagonist Cliff Carmichael gives him some crap: they were a reversal of the Peter Parker/Flash Thompson dynamic, as Cliff was the brain, Ronnie the jock. Ronnie also goes with his girlfriend Doreen to pick up her sister Summer at the airport, and she seems like she's not going to be a ray of sunshine. (Way moreso than I would've guessed!)

Stein gets a new job, although I don't think it was as a professor, which seems a waste; then stops himself from hitting the bar to celebrate. But, he sees someone jumping from building to building, and realizes he recognizes them subconsciously from his time as Firestorm. It's the Hyena! In the last panel of the issue; so maybe they should've saved this title for next time? Read more!

80-Page Thursdays: Flash Special #1!

We haven't had an 80-pager here since last August? That seems like a hundred years ago; but then, Flash's 50th anniversary here was 34 years ago...(crumples into dust, like the Flash in Crisis!) From 1990, Flash Special #1, featuring stories by Mark Waid, Len Strazewski, William Messner-Loebs, and one other I won't mention; art by Mike Parobeck, Irv Novick, Carmine Infantino, Grant Miehm, and more.

This one actually fills a bit of a hole for me, since I had been reading Flash on-and-off for some time, and when future Flash John Fox shows up, I didn't know where he had come from. If you go back and re-read those, I'm sure there's probably a caption box somewhere, saying go read this one. John was a historian from the 27th century, who gets sent back in time not for the usual research and whatnot, but an emergency: radioactive villain Manfred Mota was causing widespread devastation, and they needed to find out how the Flashes had beat him before. Never heard of him? Yeah, he's new here too!

In postwar Washington D.C. the Jay Garrick Flash is summoned to the office of J.Edgar Hoover, who doesn't care for mystery-men, but wants the Flash as a "spycatcher!" Jay isn't keen on spying on people who might be innocent, worse, his name is on a list of possible leaks in atomic weapons technology. Jay goes to visit a friend who might have been seen as less than "true-blue" American, but couldn't be a spy; and he's right: the janitor has been lifting stuff, and selling it to Mota, who's built himself a super-suit as "Atom-Smasher." With his friend's help, Jay manages to stop Mota, who wasn't a communist or anything as much as "a guy who liked to blow things up." (This would've been just before the JSA retired, rather than become government stooges.) John gets to see most of the fight, but is recalled before he can talk to Jay.

This keeps going on, as Mota keeps getting thrown in jail, then diving back into radiation and crime when he gets out; eventually melting down and sinking into the earth. John keeps just missing the Flashes, so doesn't learn much of anything; but in the 27th century a radiation surge overloads the time-machine, dosing John with way too many tachyons. John's friends are killed, but John manages to return to the timeline, now with super-speed powers! Raiding the damaged Flash Museum for costume pieces, he makes a quick suit, then manages to lure the now-radioactive monster Mota into position, to send him to the year 50 billion...John says that like Mota would age that whole time, his radioactivity decaying; rather than just dumping his ass in the distant future: damning someone to 50 billion years of solitude seems kinda harsh? Enh. 

John seemed like a slightly-older man here: I want to say he seemed way younger in his later appearances? And while he had a reporter girlfriend here, he would go after Linda Park in the late 20th century; because everyone did. And he'd later get in trouble for stealing time-travel tech, so he maybe moved to the 853rd century: he would be part of Justice Legion A in DC One Million. Either because they needed a speedster type and maybe somebody the present heroes would recognize as mostly-cool; or because he couldn't go back to the 27th century 'til the heat was off.

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Maybe I'm just drawing a blank right now, but I was trying to think of time-travelling DC villains--basically, their Kang. Speedsters don't count! I remember the Time Commander, if no one else does; but Chronos might be the best known of the lot, and he's not way up there; but ahead of today's bad guy, anyway. From 1982, Justice League of America #198, "Once Upon a Time in the Wild Wild West..." Written by Gerry Conway, pencils by Don Heck, inks by Brett Breeding.

A bit of setting-up this month, as four Justice Leaguers wake up in the year 1878, without their memories. They are fairly quickly paired up with western heroes of the time: Green Lantern with Jonah Hex, Elongated Man with Scalphunter, Zatanna with Cinnamon, and Flash with Bat Lash. But none of them have yet noticed, each pair is being watched by an unseen rider...

Meanwhile, in 1981, Superman is trying to find out where his teammates have disappeared to. Using a new satellite positioning system set up by Hawkman--that sounds very similiar to GPS, which would have been super-new at the time! Supes heads to their last known location, the Grand Canyon, and is promptly attacked by a good-sized robot. He defeats the robot easily--too easily, since it was a lead-lined trap, filled with Kryptonite! Future Kryptonite, gathered by the Lord of Time from the year 3786; which I mention because I wonder if that's going to come into play in the conclusion: what's the half-life of Kryptonite? Enh, if it knocked Supes out, it's probably still within its shelf life. The LoT had of course sent the other Leaguers back in time, as part of a plan to capture an anti-matter bubble due to pop over the Grand Canyon in 1878. With Superman dying, he had time to see how it played out...

Man, the Lord of Time is bland. None of Chronos's visual flair; even the Time Commander had a better outfit. Still, I'll have to find the next issue, to see how his plan went south. Read more!