It's been a while since we've had a random MCP, and here's one I would've been reading new off the rack: from 1988, Marvel Comics Presents #5, cover by John Buscema and Klaus Janson. 

Five issues in, this was five chapters into three serials, with only the last Daredevil feature a stand-alone. If I recall, this was Logan's second solo story, after his first limited. Having gotten his mutant clock cleaned by crimelord Roche and his thugs--namely vampiric Sapphire Styx and Razorfist--Logan spends this chapter recovering, rescued by Jessan Hoan. Who reveals, she knew he was Wolverine. The claws might've tipped her off. (Written by Chris Claremont, pencils by John Buscema, inks by Klaus Janson.)

I've read all of this Man-Thing story, but coming in now I'm at a loss: looks like yet another conspiracy around the Sallis version of the Super-Soldier Serum, a Satanist babe seemingly in control of Man-Thing, and an Ollie North-type testifying in front of Congress; that he may have acted 'unconventionally' but he did so for America, darn it. It's pretty obvious Gerber finds him more full of it than the Satanists. (Written by Steve Gerber, art by Tom Sutton.)

Likewise, the only thing I remember about this Shang-Chi serial, is that I think Leiko is taken hostage for most of it, and she loses a hand? I hadn't read much Master of Kung Fu when this came out, so Shang seemed strangely passive; like he's usually waiting for something to happen. Grindberg was doing a nice Neal Adams-feel there, though. (Written by Doug Moench, pencils by Tom Grindberg, inks by Dave Cockrum.)

Finally, the Daredevil short finds our hero trying to save a kid from a stalker. There's a little twist, but not much; but for eight pages, sure. (Written by Terry Kavanagh, pencils by Dwayne Turner, inks by Michael Gustovich.)

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While I often pick up random issues of Marvel Comics Presents to blog later; this one I picked up because it had an interesting cover. One of them, anyway: the Vengeance/War Machine cover is almost interchangeable with the next issue's cover! I wasn't expecting the stories within to be...kind of grotty? From 1994, Marvel Comics Presents #167.

Strangely enough, once again we blogged the next issue some time back, but I didn't even scan a page of the conclusion to the Spider-Woman serial? This issue is the second of three parts, and I think it wraps up pretty quickly in the next one, but this chapter is deeply creepy, as Julia Carpenter drives to pick up her daughter, while her stalker makes the same drive to kill her, shooting her in front of her daughter. She doesn't seem to have a secret identity anymore, so this happens immediately? Julia also has a completely human reaction to a gun in her face; that a guy super-hero would never ever have in a comic; and I think the stalker's face isn't shown the whole serial, to make the point that it could be anyone, but seems like its making him more than he was...I don't like this one. "The Great American Mall Shoot-Out, part 2 of 3," written by Nel Yomtov, pencils by John Czop, inks by Tim Dzon.

I don't know if he did any other comic work, but Paul Johnson did the cover I liked, and art for a Man-Thing serial: "Behold, the Man, conclusion" Written by Simon Jowlett, art by Paul Johnson. The Man-Thing rampages through the characters of a blocked writer, a writer named...Ted Sallis? Ted seemingly breaks through the illusion, returning to the reality of being a mindless swamp monster. Pyrrhic victory there.

"Old-Time Religion" sets up a War Machine vs. Vengeance fight, as a televangelist stirs up bad feelings, and gangs based on War Machine and Vengeance tear up Los Angeles. The "Revengers" are described as "wanting vengeance for the riots that swept L.A." which makes me think they might be kinda racist? Vengeance tries to talk them down, which fails miserably; although I'm not sure a Ghost Rider-type like that ever even tried talking things through before, but of course War Machine isn't interested in listening, either. (Written by Chris Cooper, breakdowns by Reggie Jones, finishes by Fred Harper.)

Lastly, the conclusion of a Turbo two-parter, guest-starring the Pantheon: they wanted to see if whoever wearing the Turbo-suit could be trusted with it, and while they don't think the guy Mike could, they're more impressed with the girl, Mickey. She was so much better at it, and still improving; while I think Mike would later be revealed to be a Dire Wraith or something. ("Cutting Class," written by Evan Skolnick, pencils by Guy Dorian, inks by John Stokes.) Read more!

The real 'curse' is the numbering on this thing.

Ugh, this is continued in a Spider-Man one-shot, then an X-Men one-shot that appears to introduce another sub-team that'll never be seen again, then...is that it? I can't even tell! From 2021, Avengers: Curse of the Man-Thing #1, written by Steve Orlando, art by Francesco Mobili.

The villain this issue, calls herself "Harrower," which is about as try-hard as it sounds but I think it's supposed to be. She's the grand-niece of a member of Hordeculture, a relatively recent Jonathan Hickman/Francis Yu invention: radical botanist mad scientists. Think A.I.M. if it was older, somewhat racist ladies working with plants. (They suck, but they're also supposed to; they're villains.) Harrower might be a little out there even for them, though; as she plans on using the Man-Thing to wipe out humanity. Her aunt doesn't really think that's gonna work, but also knows there's no telling her niece anything; it's going to probably have to run its course and blow up in her face. Harrower lures out Man-Thing with a man panicking at being turned into a plant; and seemingly skins the silent monster.

The next day, weird, huge vegetable growth appear worldwide, and the Avengers investigate various locations. Captain America is seemingly engulfed in vines, and finds himself in a dark swamp, facing off against some old grudges-slash-deep cuts: Nuke was pretty well known, but I rarely remember the 50's anti-commie/lunatic Cap's real name of "William Burnside. (I believe that was a much later addition, possibly from Ed Brubaker? 50's Cap had changed his name to "Steven Rogers" and went with it.) Protocide I recall from Dan Jurgens' Cap run, but I also read the Priest stories with "Anti-Cap" and have zero recollection of them. Cap receives help with a mysterious figure he doesn't recognize, but shares a link with all of them: it's Doctor Ted Sallis, or what's left of him, deep inside the Man-Thing.

While in the real world, people begin bursting into flames from a combination of spores and fear; Sallis explains the Man-Thing's dying act had been to try and get Captain America there, but he didn't know why. Sallis admits, he wasn't trying to remake the Super-Soldier formula (the link between him and the others that appeared) and that he didn't create it...Smells like a retcon coming, but whatever. It also feels like more agency than Man-Thing was usually given, but maybe he wasn't as mindless as back in the day. Read more!

Dallan and Sepsis, that's a cover!

It's entirely possible that I buy this every time I see it in the quarter bins, but it's a stone classic: from 1979, the Micronauts #7, "Adventure into Fear!" Plot and script by Bill Mantlo, plot and breakdowns by Michael Golden, finishes by Josef Rubinstein. 

The Micronauts were still trapped on earth, staying with their young friend Steve Coffin, whose dad Ray had fallen into the Prometheus Pit, a gateway to the Microverse. After a Star Trek rerun, they catch a news broadcast noting Project H.E.L.L. was still sealed off by a force-field, but not mentioning Ray or any tiny aliens. No one knows that Ray was currently having a conversation with the mysterious Time Traveller; but Steve was distraught, and strong emotions in a Florida swamp...you know what that means: the macabre Man-Thing! Cementing the Micronauts in the Marvel Universe! 

Steve is understandably, pants-crappingly terrified; while the Micros are mildly concerned, what kind of planet was this? They have a hard time doing any damage to the swamp monster, so Steve fires up the airboat, chopping the Man-Thing into slimy mulch! Oh, he's fine. While not being aware or sentient, there's still the sense the Man-Thing kinda threw that fight, rather than hurt the kid, and gives him the win he needed to keep going. The Micronauts regroup, to begin their search for Ray and a way back to their battle with Baron Karza...not realizing, the Baron was now arriving on earth! 

Even if you somehow weren't reading Micronauts at the time, you might recall this one, since there was a full page house ad for it.

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Did anyone write in and demand it, I wonder?

I know I have a full set somewhere, but every time I come across a Frankenstein story I think I had the Essential Frankenstein somewhere...mildly irritated I'm not sure where it got to. From 1994, Book of the Dead #4, reprinting 1974's Man-Thing #11, "Dance to the Murder" Written by Steve Gerber, pencils by Mike Ploog, inks by Frank Chiaramonte; from 1956, Mystic #52, "The Effigy" Written by Carl Wessler, art by Wally Wood; and from 1973, (The Monster of) Frankenstein #4, "Death of the Monster!" Adapted by Gary Friedrich, from Mary Shelley's original; pencils by Mike Ploog, inks by John Verpoorten.

We've mentioned this before, but this was during the stretch when Marvel was flooding the racks with books, just hoping to swamp all the other companies. We've also mentioned, I hate Richard Rory! I don't care if he's an author-insert for Steve Gerber; he just rubs me the wrong way. I'm positive I somehow read Savage She-Hulk #9 as a kid; where he accidentally breaks the bank at a casino that tried to cheat him; and he was still pathetic in that. The Man-Thing hangs around Richard feeling sorry for himself in the swamp--Richard may be the only person alive to make that lump of swamp feel better about himself; at least he's not Richard Rory, right? His girl Ruth, from earlier in the series, had left him; so now he was ruthless...ah, hard to believe no one pays me for this. Still, when he sees a "ballet dancer" running through the swamp, he thinks he's lost it; but it is a girl being chased by masked cultists. Despite being mindless so maybe even slightly less invested in Richard's well-being than I am, the Man-Thing saves him multiple times over the course of 17 pages; and the 'cultists' are not what they seem, but a rather heavy-handed exposition-dump slash 'message' at the end. I do kind of like the last panel, where Manny has his hand on Richard's shoulder, like he's comforting him, or steering him home after a disappointing night out. ("She's out of your league, sport; let's get you home to bed.")

Next, "The Effigy," a horror story with Wally Wood art...from Marvel, so it's so much tamer than a EC Comic would be. A cult has a voodoo dolly of a petty criminal, so he steals it to break its hold on him, or for peace of mind. Surely it isn't real...but would you chance it? Look, I'm 40% sure there's gotta be an EC story where the guy throws his effigy into the incinerator; I know there's one with no air holes in the safe. (That was an issue of Plop!, you simpleton.)

Finally, Marvel's version of the origin of Frankenstein's Monster concludes, as he is stranded in the arctic with a pair of doomed expedition members. After an extended flashback of how he got frozen, with a lot of fighting some native-types for some reason; the Monster completes a raft, but too late for the others. Still, he learns of a descendent of Frankenstein, that could perhaps help him...something. Can't recall what, exactly: the Monster was kind of a dick in his early stories. Added to the last page is a blurb advising "Want more Book of the Dead? Write in and tell us!" I feel like Marvel must have got some letters--more than a couple, less than fifty? A guess. Read more!

I'd love to finish the team, but now I want variant costumes.

All together now: "some time back," we saw the previous issue; we may finish this storyline someday! From 2011, Thunderbolts #164, "Golden Age Thunderbolts" Written by Jeff Parker, pencils by Kev Walker, inks by Terry Pallot.

Since I've rarely brought it up here, you may have guessed I didn't love the Fox X-Men cartoon as much as most. Not just because Batman: the Animated Series was better; or because I wanted Nightcrawler episodes, with fun Nightcrawler, not "why has God forsaken me" Nightcrawler. Although, I do love any episodes with Bishop still trying to push that rock uphill. Huh, could've sworn I was going somewhere with this intro; but let's get to today's book: from 1997, Adventures of the X-Men #11, "Tower of Despair" Written by Ralph Macchio, pencils by Yancey Labat, inks by Ralph Cabrera.

After an adventure in the Mojoverse, Jean Grey and Storm were supposed to be teleported home, but have instead landed in a swamp. They are of course immediately beset by hillbillies, and within three pages the Man-Thing shows up. While Storm is concerned after the Man-Thing lights a guy up with his touch, Jean realizes she'll be fine as long as she doesn't show fear, and Manny tries to reach out to her, which gives her the short form of his origin. Jean is struck by the tragedy, of Ted Sallis barely even remembering being human; but traditionally Man-Thing is portrayed as more mindless than that.

Back at the X-Mansion, Cyclops and Gambit have returned safely, then check in with the Professor to find the others. Before the Professor can start looking, they are interrupted by a message from Lilandra, warning them that the M'Kraan Crystal was acting up and might engulf all reality. Just a heads-up there.

Making their way to Citrusville, Florida; Jean and Storm are troubled by the incredibly glum townspeople; who are collectively so depressed they can barely gather to hear "the glorious words of Godfrey Silverton." (Hey, that rings a bell...) Jean can't read Silverton's mind, which pretty much screams bad guy, so they take a room for the night to see what happens. Namely, the townspeople gathering like zombies, as Silverton reveals himself to be D'spayre! Yeah, that hope and enlightenment he promised? No such thing! It's a meaningless existance and there's no reason to go on, except for D'spayre to harvest their hopelessness to build his dark tower. Jean challenges D'Spayre's lies, with battle on the astral plane; while Storm tries to destroy the tower. Storm kinda has the easier job: with a "believe in yourselves" variant of one of the speeches she would give before using her powers on the cartoon, she lightnings the tower; which also causes the Man-Thing to shuffle over for a gander.

Reading D'spayre's mind, Jean realizes he's not the big boss, but rather a lackey of the "dweller in darkness." Terrified at the thought of failing his master, D'Spayre is vulnerable to the Man-Thing's touch, which drives him away. Before returning to the swamp, Man-Thing makes psychic contact with Jean, leaving her a subconscious message...that may be needed in the next, and final, issue! Which we'll see soon enough.

There were multiple tie-in series to the X-Men cartoon, with most of them adapting episodes; but this one was 12 all-new 99-cent issues, with more guest-stars than usual too: Spider-Man and the Hulk both show up. The 99-cent books didn't last forever, though; and the original release of X-Men ended September 20, 1997; so this series was on borrowed time.

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Wouldn't he zzzzzzt himself the first time he did something foolish?

Also this issue: Man-Thing gives a shack the what-for. From 1974, Man-Thing #3, "Day of the Killer, Night of the Fool!" Written by Steve Gerber, pencils by Val Mayerik, inks by Jack Abel.

We start with the shack, which wasn't a harmless construction shack, but was in actuality a trap set for Man-Thing by his foes, contractor F.A. Schist and Professor Wilbur Wickham. They want to kill Manny real bad, although this issue doesn't get into why. Man-Thing was usually placid and somewhat lethargic, but today he seems to remember that trap, and smashes the crap out of it, scaring off Schist and company for now.

Nearby, Richard Rory (...ugh) says goodbye to some new friends; namely some bikers that were going to kill him but now like him. Unfortunately, Richard forgot to ask them, or the cops that were also there earlier, to borrow some gas, so he and his girl Ruth are still stuck there! His biker friends are even less fortunate: they ride smack dab into the Foolkiller, who stops them with his "purification" laser pistol. FK is searching for Rory; to their credit the bikers don't give him up, and are both killed. (The fate of their girls is unclear, if they survived the bikes exploding, but Foolkiller doesn't question them or check.) Foolkiller then heads to the F.A. Schist construction camp, to give Schist his card:

Later, a familiar seeming sports car stops to help Rory and Ruth, before heading up the road: while grateful, Rory has a feeling "as though he's had a meeting with destiny--and slept through it!" Even though he's in costume again the next page, that was pretty obviously Foolkiller helping Rory out, but he misses his first target en route to his third: Dr. Theodore Sallis--the Man-Thing! Somehow, FK had accessed the secret "Serum SO-2" information, and put together what had happened to Sallis. (Which would seem obvious if you read comics, but a bit of a jump in-story!) He is distracted by a helicopter, which in another logical leap he assumes is Schist trying to escape, and shoots it down. Instead, it was innocent bystanders escaping a flood, now crashed into a swamp and surrounded by gators. This unforced error seems to jar Foolkiller, so he's slow to respond, but the Man-Thing lurches into action, throwing the gators around and saving the people.

Foolkiller says he will reconsider Manny's death, but in doing so calls him Sallis, which seems to trigger the same response that saying "Banner" to the Hulk did. Feeling the hate in FK, the Man-Thing advances on him, and is gunned down by repeated laser blasts. The second-to-last panel has a Marvel Value Stamp cut out of it, but still a good line: "And finally...when his insides are dry as chalk" the Man-Thing falls, dead. Well, 'dead,' I'm pretty sure like a large Gatorade would reconstitute him. I also know the Foolkiller gun and costume have been passed around a bit, but I had forgotten the religious crusade aspect of this one. Although he seems less 'avenging angel' than 'dangerous lunatic,' Gerber probably won't make a paladin of him. Read more!

When we looked at Daredevil villain-slash-misfire Shock a bit ago, we mentioned how Mr. Fear probably wasn't very high on anybody's list of DD bad guys. But, it's weird to consider the names you would think of--Bullseye, Kingpin, Elektra--were all relatively late additions to his book, primarily gaining prominence when Frank Miller took over. DD had a completely different rogues' gallery before then: guys like the Jester, the Purple Man, the Matador, the Gladiator. Gladiator was largely reformed and written out in DD #173, the first issue of Daredevil I read as a kid! But Gladiator fared better than today's other bad guy: Death-Stalker! From 1974, Daredevil #114, "A Quiet Night in the Swamp!" Written by Steve Gerber, art by Bob Brown, inks by Vince Colletta.

Looking it up here, this was Death-Stalker's second appearance, out of a mere ten spread over five years. (Although, Daredevil was bi-monthly for a long stretch there.) I mainly remember him from the Bullpen Bulletins shot of the cover of DD #158, where Death-Stalker would die fighting DD in a graveyard, phasing partway through a tombstone and getting stuck! You may want to settle for a reprint of that one, since it was Frank Miller's first issue penciling the book. But I skimmed through a few of Death-Stalker's appearances (DD #128, written by Marv Wolfman, looks especially not great, and I'd love to read it!) and since they were spread across four writers, he's kind of all over the place. He's got some intangibility and a death-touch, but seems surprisingly hands-off, coercing or creating various villains to go after Daredevil. (The Purple Man seemed to be doing about the same thing concurrently, which wasn't helping matters.) Roger McKenzie would reveal his secret identity, which kind of landed like a wet fart: I don't think it was meant to be a dramatic reveal, though, just clearing up some threads. Anyway, this issue, Death-Stalker and Gladiator have Daredevil beat in the Everglades--wait, the Everglades? You know what that means!

Richard Rory? Ooh, I hate that guy! No, I meant the Man-Thing, of course! The Gladiator's sawblades aren't doing anything to Manny, so Glad panics and gets burned, but Death-Stalker is able to take the swamp creature down with a touch--a rare loss for the mindless creature. Death-Stalker defeats a battered Daredevil as well, but doesn't deign to kill him yet; instead ordering a sulking Gladiator to tie them up in a cabin with their other prisoner, Foggy Nelson's sister Candice. She had discovered a conspiracy around the work of (presumed) dead biochemist Ted Sallis, and tried to leak the documents. Since Candice says DD and Rory didn't know anything, Death-Stalker is content to leave them in a burning building: Gladiator wishes he could've killed DD in battle, but wasn't calling the shots. While Daredevil manages to escape with the unconscious Rory not realizing a thing, the Man-Thing knocks out Gladiator, but Death-Stalker still has Candice prisoner.

Daredevil changes back into Matt Murdock, and plays dumb about recent events, since Rory didn't see him as DD. Matt calls Foggy to check in, and is advised that he and Daredevil should get back to New York in a hurry. Except, Matt realizes he didn't know 'Daredevil' was with him: Foggy was trying to sneak him a message, since Death-Stalker now had him prisoner as well! I do have the next issue; we may have to check it sometime. You don't necessarily have to go running out for these, though. Oh, and the Marvel Value Stamp was the Werewolf!
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Things have to stick together, I guess.

Once again, we see Florida in the Marvel Universe is nothing but swamp, except for maybe one little spot of NASA. From 1981, Marvel Two-In-One #77, "Only the Swamp Survives!" Written by Tom DeFalco, pencils by Ron Wilson, inks by Chic Stone.

I'm midway through the last Two-In-One Essential volume, but I think this issue is from just prior. While Man-Thing gets the guest-star billing, it's also a Nick Fury story: Man-Thing had already appeared in MTIO #1 #43, while Fury had gotten cover billing on #26 and #51. Nick approaches Ben to test-pilot a new jet capable of hitting Mach 6, and Ben jumps at the chance to prove himself as something other than a monster. Somewhat predictably, the test flight doesn't go particularly well: something gives out, and it takes all of Ben's skill just to crash-land into the swamp without cracking up completely. Still, the crash is so bad even the Thing is messed up, with a broken arm and severe concussion. (When emergency systems fail, Ben has to punch his way out of a flaming wreck; would an ordinary human pilot have even survived taking off in that jet?)

Stumbling dazed through the swamp, Ben thinks back to "the first time (Fury) conned me," during World War II, and the subsequent flashback adventure with the Howling Commandos. Meanwhile, empathically feeding off of Ben's courage, Man-Thing tags along with Ben's swamp-slog, saving him from some poachers, but giving him the "fear burns at the Man-Thing's touch!" when an exhausted Ben collapses and fears he's let Alicia down. That jolts Ben enough to keep going until the Human Torch finds him. (Johnny doesn't appear to see the Man-Thing, since the mindless creature lurches off then. EDIT: There may be a reason for that: I'm not sure Reed's ever seen or been told about the Man-Thing. Even if he didn't know the particulars, he'd be driven to science the hell out of that.) In the hospital, Ben's leg appears to be broken as well, although he wasn't as hospitalized as he would be in MTIO #96!
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I guess putting two passive, reactive characters against each other is one way to go.

I've said it before, but in the Marvel Universe, go to Florida, and you're gonna run into Man-Thing. Why should Shang-Chi be any different? From 1974, Master of Kung Fu #19, "Retreat" Written by Steve Englehart, art by Paul Gulacy, inks by Al Milgrom.

I've usually preferred Man-Thing as a guest-star than the lead: the mindless muck-monster is inherently reactive, not really showing a lot of initiative in his stories. Interestingly enough, I'm not sure Shang-Chi does either, since he doesn't ever seem to have a lot of choices, but agonizes over them constantly. This month, Shang is on the run in the Florida Everglades, from a pair of his father's assassins. Already tired and drugged, Shang tries to avoid the fight until they catch up to him, at which point he beats them into a bayou with a log. But he is unprepared to run into the Man-Thing. In this case, somewhat literally: Shang collides with and is engulfed by him, then pulled out by the passing Lu Sun.

Lu Sun seems a nice enough fellow, although I'm curious exactly what an Asian wise man was doing out in the middle of the Everglades in the middle of the night. Seriously, I just had to look it up, and he apparently only appears this issue! (Although, not the issue pictured there.) I almost wonder if Shang wasn't more drugged than he let on, and only imagined him. Shang could've passed through Man-Thing himself, and although Lu Sun is hit in the leg by two arrows when the assassins catch up, they don't really acknowledge Lu Sun...

The Man-Thing happens back along and "whosoever knows fear--burns at the Man-Thing's touch!" The assassins are incinerated, and as the Man-Thing lurches back into the swamp, Shang-Chi is left wondering if he isn't a mindless destroyer himself. Which is a little harsh, Shang.
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After years of jokes, I finally get my hands on my own...

...and it's a bit beat-up and torn, but Giant-Size Man-Thing #1, "How will we keep warm when the last flame dies?" Written by Steve Gerber, art by Mike Ploog, inks by Frank Chiaramonte. And once you get past the jokes about the title, man, what a weird book.

As is often the case, the Man-Thing seems to lurch around the background of his own book: a cult that worships entropy wants to stop an environmental group from setting up an experimental commune in the Everglades, so they use the power of the Golden Brain. As you do. The entropists summon up a golden demon, but the Man-Thing defeats it and the Brain is lost. In the swamp, the Brain vaguely remembers it used to be the Glob, and fought the Hulk once; but grows itself a new body with seemingly no memory and joins the environmentalists.

The head of the entropists, having handled the Brain before, is able to assert control again, and reverts it back to the Glob and sets it to destroy the commune, Omegaville. Man-Thing intervenes again, tearing the Glob to pieces. The head cultist tries to get the Glob back into the fight, but it instead covers him, smothering him to death.

Maybe it's because I've been watching old Hammer horror movies this week, but it's like the seventies were full of weird pseudo-hippies and/or vaguely satanic cultists. And monsters. Also this issue, reprints of silly old Marvel stories; a Stan Lee/Steve Ditko story with a jewel thief and an ice monster hoax, a Jack Kirby one where a scientist abuses super-speed, and Goom, the Thing from Planet X!

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More Man-Beast? I'm not sure Thor spent that much time on Galactus...

We looked at Thor #316 some years back, featuring Thor and Iron Man against the Bi-Beast and Man-Beast, guest-starring the Man-Thing for good measure. That was the second of two parts, but I didn't realize the Man-Beast--who looked either dead or in bad shape after a crash at the end of #316--would return to give Thor the hassle again. Or at least, I didn't think he would the very next issue. From 1982, Thor #317, "Chaos at Canaveral" Written by Doug Moench; layouts by Keith Pollard; inks by Brett Breeding, Chic Stone, Pablo Marcos, and Joe Rubinstein.

Iron Man has a brief appearance here: having finished his business at Cape Canaveral for a satellite launch, he had to split; but Thor was enjoying checking it out. IM offers him a tour, and as Donald Blake Thor accepts. Iron Man introduces Donald to Diane LaMarr, an astronaut trainee. She was more than happy to give him the tour, but was sad that it might be one of her last official duties: with budget cuts looming, latest hired meant first fired. Diane does find a kindred spirit in Donald, who had recently lost his job at a New York clinic and wasn't sure what he was going to do next. (As Thor, though, he sounds a little homesick for Asgard.)

Meanwhile, the Man-Thing, having witnessed the Man-Beast's crash landing, pulls the hateful monster out of the wreck out of mere curiosity. The mindless muck-monster drags the Man-Beast to the Cape, then forgets what it was doing and wanders off. (Remember, in Marvel's Florida, it's like 95% swamp...) The Man-Beast awakens, right where he wanted to be, somehow: he's convinced he crash-landed and stumbled there himself. He uses his hate-blasts to turn the staff and onlookers at the Cape against each other, then recaps his origin for them while they riot. He planned on hijacking the weather satellite launch, so he could return to his homeworld, Counter-Earth. You may remember Counter-Earth from old, pre-Jim Starlin Warlock stories; but as an editorial footnote points out, MB was unaware that it had been moved from its orbit opposite Earth's. Man, Man-Beast can not catch a break; but I don't know how he intended to ride there in a weather satellite, either.

While the Man-Thing seemingly realizes that he's let Man-Beast cause a lot of havoc, it tries to make amends by leading Thor to the rocket. (Which Thor probably could've figured out himself; the Man-Beast probably wasn't there to raid the commissary.) Diane's already there, suited up as well: she realizes she can't stop the launch, but fears if it doesn't go well, the space program could lose even more funding. (Yes, because a congressional appropriations committee isn't going to buy your little story about a space wolfman fouling things up.) Thor and Man-Beast punch it out a bit on the gantry to the rocket--which apparently could've been manned, since there's an open hatch Diane gets in, and then Mjolnir falls into. As the countdown ends and the rocket launches, "now begins a different kind of countdown--a countdown in reverse..." since Thor has sixty seconds to get Mjolnir back, or he'll turn into Donald Blake!


That sixty-second countdown was woefully overused in Thor--I think Walt Simonson used it once, in his first issue, before getting rid of it and the Donald Blake identity--but this isn't bad. Thor grabs the rocket, straining to climb his way in; while the Man-Beast is apparently unfazed by the gravitational pressure of the launch and instead busies himself trying and failing to pick up Mjolnir. Meanwhile, almost forgotten, Diane blows the hatch, throwing herself, Man-Beast, and Mjolnir into space. (She had set a lifeline for herself, but of course it snapped.) Mjolnir in hand, Thor is saved, and the Man-Beast throws himself into trying to kill him, even though he should be more concerned with how he's surviving in hard vacuum, with no oxygen. Man-Beast seems fine, until a punch from Thor knocks him off the rocket, and he drifts helplessly into space. Aww...I don't know why I have a soft spot for Man-Beast, but every time he seemingly dies makes me sad.

Thor casts his hammer to the drifting Diane, saving her easily (way faster than Gravity!) then they return to earth, where the Man-Beast's hate-rays have worn off, and everyone's a little surprised their satellite launch apparently went off flawlessly. Diane's bosses are pretty damn impressed with her, and assure her they'll find something else to cut rather than their astronauts. She wants to tell Donald thanks, to see if her luck might rub off on him; while outside the Cape, the Man-Thing has once again forgotten why he was there, and shambled back into the swamp...

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"Decay Meets the Mad Viking!" Oh, and Man-Thing.

So I thought last week's Morbius comic written by Steve Gerber was crazy, but it's not a patch on today's comic: from 1975, Man-Thing #16, "Decay Meets the Mad Viking!" Written by Steve Gerber, pencils by John Buscema, inks by Tom Palmer.

"Decay" is a fixation of shock-rocker Eugene "the Star" Spangler, who concludes a Radio City concert with an announcement that he will spend the next year, in seclusion, to "compose my ultimate opus, a most profound and cosmic operatic tribute--to ruin, to rot, to all the gorgeousness of dirt and decadence! To you, my beautiful freaks, to you!" I'm pretty sure Spangler is a caricature of Alice Cooper, but Cooper was a showman, and Spangler seems like a true believer so far, closing with the proclamation that he'll be at the "house of murders," which is actually a bit more truth than hyperbole...

One page and three weeks later, a young woman is being chased through the swamps of the Florida Everglades, because it wouldn't be a Man-Thing comic without a young woman being chased through the swamps of the Florida Everglades. A gator nearly gets her, but it's stopped by the Man-Thing (mostly just to shut the girl up, since Manny is generally mindless here) and then Man-Thing is attacked by the girl's pursuer: the mad viking of the title, who rants about men, and hits the confused and uncaring Manny with a battle-ax.

Meanwhile, Spangler and his entourage have taken up residence at the nearby "House of Murders," which comes with a total of three editorial footnotes today; not the least of which being it was the site of Ted Sallis's research lab before he became the Man-Thing. Spangler has his own little rant about how there is nothing in life to aspire to, only mud; when the chased woman shows up. The woman recognizes Spangler, though; and immediately realizes he's in danger as well, from her grandfather, the mad viking. A former longshoreman and a brute of a man, he was going to be forced into retirement after his sixty-fifth birthday, but felt that "a man's gotta work, or he dries up an' dies!" When an executive tries to force him out, with the cops, the viking attacks and pummels everyone there, calling them "toy men--not a backbone in the lot!"

At home, the viking disapproves of his granddaughter Astrid's choice of men--a young artist, whom the viking throws out a third-story window--and then he really starts to lose it, beginning a crusade against men he considered weaklings and sissies, and the women that supported them. Where he would've gotten a viking outfit and battle-ax, I couldn't guess; but he next murders a guitarist during a concert, and sends a list of his prospective targets to the papers, which includes Spangler. Spangler answers Astrid with his own story, how his own grandfather was a mean man who hunted parakeets for sport, his mother was a hunting dog, and his father a Nazi submarine commander. (...what?) Astrid doesn't think Spangler is taking the situation seriously, when the viking attacks. Still, Spangler's crew aren't "gentle hippies," and are willing to fight.

As the battle rages, and the Man-Thing shows up again, Spangler is inspired, scrawling frantically away at his magnum opus. He probably should've done so a bit further back from the action, since he catches a battle-ax in the chest. The viking turns on Astrid, but is stopped by the Man-Thing, who realizes the viking is just as helpless in the grip of the unknown as Spangler, as Astrid, as anyone; and is driven by insecurity and fear--all together now--"and whatever knows fear--burns at the Man-Thing's touch!!" The viking goes down, "impotent and harmless," (if not armless) as the Man-Thing lurches back into his swamp. He doesn't understand, but does anyone?

A surprisingly dark, dense issue; while still hitting the notes usually used in a Man-Thing story. And of course, Buscema knocks it out of the park.
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