If you find the rest of the series in the long box but not this one, I got there first!

I won't buy it every time, but if it's a cheap copy? Yeah, buying it again! From 1984, Crystar #6, "Demon" Written by Jo Duffy, pencils by Ricardo Villamonte, inks by Dave Simons. The best cover by Michael Golden!

Weirdly, while I know I had the first and third issues for sure, I don't think I got a copy of this one until much later, although I suspect I might've read it in-store. Nightcrawler guest-stars this issue, gets more panel time than in like a year of Uncanny X-Men, and is of course just the coolest. After a session in the Danger Room (where we hear the Professor, but don't see him or any of the other X-Men) Kurt gets dressed up for a date with his girlfriend Amanda. Although it hadn't come up in a while and she was semi-retired, she was a pretty decent sorceress, and had been trying to follow up on a weird magical feeling she had experienced lately: too late, she warns Kurt, maybe don't teleport near the space rift...

Kurt gets zapped to Crystalium...that is a terrible name for a planet. Oh, like 'earth' is that great. He hides out as two local farmers walk their dragon, but is then spotted by the youngest crystal warrior, Stalax, who thinks he must be a Chaos demon. While Crystar and his men search for the 'demon,' Kurt is taken in by Moltar and his lava men, who assume he's on their side. Lava babe Lavour gives Kurt the tour, and confides that Moltar and his wizard Zardeth are probably sweating the idea that he's there to replace them. (EDIT: Lavour had dated first one brother, then the other; she was conniving, greedy, and calculating. So, basically the book's Veronica.)

Stalax finds Kurt's clothes, since he changed into his usual costume after arriving; and Crystar recognizes them as earth garments: maybe it's not a Chaos demon after all. But, the crystal girl wizard Ika gets captured by the lava men, who plan to kill her, and Kurt doesn't hold with that: he saves Ika, Crystar and company show up, and a bit of a scuffle ensues. Kurt teleports around to draw fire, and maybe showboat a bit, and the heroes get away safely. Ika is grateful at being saved, and offers to send Kurt back to earth...maybe later. Hours after disappearing, Kurt reappears at Amanda's, where she's a little miffed to recognize he had some gems from Ika! If Kurt talks his way out of that one, that's his real mutant power!

Checking out the racks that month, G.I. Joe #21 was also on sale; but I suspect my favorite was the first issue of the second Hercules mini-series. Chris Claremont would have still had a firm grip on the X-Men: X-Men/Micronauts #3 and New Mutants #13 would have been the only ancillary X-titles that month; but I wish Jo Duffy had gotten to do more with Nightcrawler. Read more!

Dallan and Sepsis, that's a cover!

It's entirely possible that I buy this every time I see it in the quarter bins, but it's a stone classic: from 1979, the Micronauts #7, "Adventure into Fear!" Plot and script by Bill Mantlo, plot and breakdowns by Michael Golden, finishes by Josef Rubinstein. 

The Micronauts were still trapped on earth, staying with their young friend Steve Coffin, whose dad Ray had fallen into the Prometheus Pit, a gateway to the Microverse. After a Star Trek rerun, they catch a news broadcast noting Project H.E.L.L. was still sealed off by a force-field, but not mentioning Ray or any tiny aliens. No one knows that Ray was currently having a conversation with the mysterious Time Traveller; but Steve was distraught, and strong emotions in a Florida swamp...you know what that means: the macabre Man-Thing! Cementing the Micronauts in the Marvel Universe! 

Steve is understandably, pants-crappingly terrified; while the Micros are mildly concerned, what kind of planet was this? They have a hard time doing any damage to the swamp monster, so Steve fires up the airboat, chopping the Man-Thing into slimy mulch! Oh, he's fine. While not being aware or sentient, there's still the sense the Man-Thing kinda threw that fight, rather than hurt the kid, and gives him the win he needed to keep going. The Micronauts regroup, to begin their search for Ray and a way back to their battle with Baron Karza...not realizing, the Baron was now arriving on earth! 

Even if you somehow weren't reading Micronauts at the time, you might recall this one, since there was a full page house ad for it.

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I never noticed, I was distracted by the leggy blonde.

Today's book might actually be worth a few bucks, but luckily this copy isn't slabbed or minty-fresh or anything. Plus, I probably have another around somewhere...from 1984, Crystar #8, "Anniversary" Written by Jo Duffy, pencils by Ricardo Villamonte, inks by Dave Simons.

Crystar and his crew are supposed to be pitching the Council of Order on joining their cause, but the prince is a bit dour today. After a little prodding, he tells the story to his friends that weren't present for all of it: long before the civil war against his brother Moltar, during the first Chaos War, it was time for a ball. It was an attempt to keep morale up and celebrate their little victories; but they receive word their man Koth had been wounded in a distant province. Koth was a noted "reckless cynic," but had recently married Ranilla, a scholarly and refined woman: few could see how that happened, but to those few their love was obvious. Crystar and Moltar, possibly because they wanted the chance to be heroes, talk themselves into going to help: they'd be jerks if they didn't, right? Joined by another of their 'captains,' Heyatt; they take off on dragons to save the day.

But, in leaving the city, the princes have left the protection of the wizard Ogeode, and are now open to attack by the Chaos wizard, Zardeth. The princes face off against his monster--who appears to have a big honking crystal on his chest that reminds me of the Bloodstone--and lose a dragon; but manage to get to the village and see Koth and Ranilla. Ranilla has deduced that Zardeth may have perverted nice, pure crystal to make a Chaos monster; and Crystar proposes the men perform a pincer move to try and hit the stone. They don't quite get to the creature, before Zardeth sends Chaos demons to destroy the village. Koth takes half the men back, but arrives too late to save Ranilla, who implores him to keep living and playing his little flute; which he's seen doing more than once already in the series.

Crystar and Moltar try to take the creature, and both are swatted down: this being pre-betrayal, Moltar even puts himself in harm's way to save his brother. Heyatt strolls right in, and takes down the monster in a cakewalk...then catches a spear in the back from a dying demon. The scene then cuts to Moltar, now a lava man, telling his men the same story, and how this anniversary was a day of mourning. How he tells that story, where Chaos is responsible for everything terrible that happens, while he and his boys were now on Team Chaos, I don't know. Why is this worth anything? It's not a bad little comic for a toy tie-in, true; but the real draw is the Michael Golden cover...which, in the background, features the skull Danzig would swipe for the cover of his first album! I was momentarily at a loss why I knew "Mother" by heart but didn't recognize anything else; MTV's Headbangers' Ball, duhr. That smidgen of notoriety is the only reason this issue could be a find for you: I had just seen a higher-grade copy at the comic shop a couple days before picking this up. Also, searching briefly, no one really knows why Marvel didn't come after Glenn for a piece of those sweet, sweet t-shirt sales; nor is it likely Golden saw dime one of that money, either. Although, I think you could a few years ago pick up a Golden shirt at SDCC: they really oughta get those into Hot Topics. Read more!

If I was writing Batman and had to introduce a new villain, I sure as fun wouldn't let my editor overhype it, since that would just kill it stone dead. "Introducing Batman's most bizarre foe!" is too much. From 1978, Batman #303, "Batman's Great Identity Switch!" Written by David Vern [as David V. Reed] pencils by John Calnan, inks by Dick Giordano.

Yeah, the villain, the "Dodo Man" is a little thin: at the Gotham City Museum of Natural History, he's disguised himself as a caveman to hide in one of the exhibits and rob the place later. Batman nearly has him, but catches a stone to the side of his head, and then things get weird. Spying the Bat-Signal outside, Batman leaps into action and changes into Bruce Wayne! Confused, Commissioner Gordon recognizes him as Batman, just disguised as Bruce Wayne, for some reason. He gives Bruce a tip about a criminal coming out of hiding at a gambling den, whom Bruce kicks the crap out of before heading back to Wayne Tower for the night. (You remember that one, with the tree in the middle of it?) Alfred wonders why Bruce's suit is all torn up, and realizes he had been fighting crime "in his real identity." Bruce argues Batman is just as real as Bruce Wayne, and doesn't see what the problem is.

Alfred has an idea what the problem is, the next morning when Bruce comes out for breakfast, in full Batman costume. Somehow, the lump on his head has derailed his usual processes. Alfred consults with a doctor, without naming any names, and checks Batman's case notes about the Dodo Man...who "compulsively steals anything having to do with the extinct dodo bird." His M.O. was to immediately try again if foiled, which gives Alfred an idea. Meanwhile, Batman is getting a lot of attention out in the daytime; which hinders him from trying to go about a normal day. Still, he's excited to go into action again, following one of his bugs to the dodo exhibit in the museum, which apparently is enough to trigger him to change costumes. Beating up the Dodo Man, Batman swings home, as Alfred drives Bruce Wayne's car home: Alfred had planted the bug, to give Batman a nudge.

Not great. But the back-up story might be something: an Unsolved Case of the Batman, "If Justice Be Served" Written by Denny O'Neil, pencils by Michael Golden, inks by Jack Abel. Um, no, it's kind of a grim one too: Bruce is playing tennis with the older Angus McKame in 107 degree heat, and Angus has a heart attack and dies. That night, in the terrible neighborhood the wealthy Angus inexplicably lived in, Batman ponders the rumor that Angus kept a wall safe full of cash, as he finds reporter Marty Rail sprinting away from a seven-foot tall man. But Batman made the wrong choice: the bigger man was Buzzy, Angus's kid; and Marty had taken off. Angus had robbed the safe, but only taken documents showing Angus was a wanted criminal fifty years ago in Death Valley. Buzzy tries to stop Angus and gets shot, but manages to shove the dirty reporter out a window. Batman's 0-for-3 here, but lets the documents be taken away by the wind, leaving Angus's reputation as a decent man untouched.

Also, if I had to come up with a new Batman villain, on the fly...um, Knockoff! He's cribbed gimmicks and weapons from every bad guy in Gotham, from Mr. Freeze to the Ten-Eyed Man! So he's not just causing trouble, and the bad guys are after him too, he's also a forensic nightmare...
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Amazing how what's scary when you're a kid is 'meh' when you're old...

The cover didn't ring any bells, but I do believe I read this one off of the spinner rack when I was nine years old. And it creeped me right out! From 1980, Mystery in Space #113, featuring "Trouble in Paradise" Written by George Kashdan, pencils by Michael Golden, inks by Bob Wiacek; "Passages" Written by Len Wein, art by Joe Staton; "The Eyes of the Bekkitt!" Written by J.M. DeMatteis, art by Jerry Grandenetti; "Gremlins" Written by Len Wein, art by Joe Kubert; and "Beasts of Burden" Written by George Kashdan, pencils by Trevor Von Eeden, inks by John Celardo.

The lead story, "Trouble in Paradise," is the one I remember: three computer specialists--a remarkably diverse trio for a 1980 comic--answer a want ad on the idyllic, advanced planetoid Orega. Their job is a breeze, the people are cheery, and their science super-advanced, yet there's still a few warning signs: everyone is too cheery, their job seems to involve robotics yet none are to be seen, and the science is able to patch up an injured member of the trio far too quickly. When they aren't allowed to leave Orega, the horrible truth is revealed...the people were immortal, true, but their brains had been "computerized" over time. They still needed a bit of human input here and there, hence the want ad. The trio live a long, long life on Orega; eventually placing a new ad...

Man, that brain-replacement bit made my skin crawl back then. Now I'm old and falling apart, you might as well replace large chunks of me...I didn't buy this back in 1980, possibly because of the creep factor; I'm not even sure I finished reading it since the other stories didn't ring a bell. "Gremlins" is the only one with a happy ending; but the twist on "Beasts of Burden" wasn't bad.
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Nightwing's beat includes Bludhaven, Gotham, Arizona...

Her previous appearance seemed like a Punisher comic written by a Punisher writer; and well, so does this one. From 2002, Nightwing #70, "Dangled" Written by Chuck Dixon, pencils by William Rosado, inks by Rob Stull and Jesse Delperdang. And a Michael Golden cover.

The cop-turned-burned vigilante Hella is back, in the last of her appearances; and I'm going to assume Nightwing had been working the case in a previous issue, because how he tracks her to Arizona I have no idea. For her part, Hella has tracked down a mobster involved in the bombing of her family; who has been living a miserable life in witness protection. Although the mobster seems not particularly happy to be alive, he changes his tune pretty quickly looking down the barrel of a shotgun.


Oddly enough, most of the town appears to be in witness protection; and while Hella is more than happy to gun them down too, Nightwing isn't making it easy. In the end, the mobster gets the drop on Hella, but is stopped from killing her; and goes back to suburban life...which probably wasn't going to end well for him.

If this had been a Punisher comic, Frank and Hella probably would've murdered the entire town. Which might have made for a more fun issue...I kind of thought the character had potential, although I don't know if she needed the faux-thong on her costume. Or the lips on her mask that looked like a sex toy. (I didn't think they did her first appearance.)

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Like an M&M in a Godiva chocolate box...

From 1984, U.S. 1 #8, "Heart-Brakes!" Written by Al Milgrom, pencils by Frank Springer, inks by Mike Esposito.

I hadn't read any of this issue before, but this one does feature a catfight between the lead character U.S.'s love interests: waitress Mary McGrill and trucker Taryn "Down the Highway" O'Connell. Taryn shows up at Mary's truck stop, scuffed up after an accident, and throws herself at U.S. just to piss off Mary. Mary retaliates by snooping in Taryn's truck and finding the costume of the biker villain Midnight! Which would explain why Taryn was scufffed up, but also could be a plant, by Mary or someone else. Panicked, Taryn uses Midnight's whip to escape, although U.S. notices Taryn didn't seem to know how to use the whip's mind-control power. Taryn hijacks a motorcycle, U.S. gives chase in his modified, toyetic big rig; and Taryn is eventually, apparently killed by trying to use the whip--in time for the real Midnight to arrive!

Plotwise, that's not terrible, but it's not a great comic: a lot of bad jokes, serviceable art, for a barely-remembered toy. Except, I had thought someone had posted the cover a while back, so I had to pick it up out of a quarter-bin.

Michael Golden, delivering the goods. So much better than most books would deserve, let alone this one.

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"This is your captain, speaking: SSSSK!"

This is another comic where the cover somewhat misleads regarding the story within--or rather, writes a check the interior can't cash. Not to say it's bad, but...From 1994, "Dark Cargo" from Jurassic Park Adventures #2, reprinting Jurassic Park: Raptor #2, written by Steve Englehart, art by Armando Gil and Dell Barras, cover by Michael Golden!


Set immediately after the first Jurassic Park movie, Drs. Grant and Sattler have been trying to track down some raptor eggs that may have gone missing. They have, stolen with the raptor mom, by the hunter Lawala, who's working for parties unknown. Previously, the mom was killed, the eggs have hatched and grown remarkably quickly, and Grant, Sattler, and the young raptors are all in cages aboard a cargo jet. Grant tries picking the lock with a piece of his belt, but may have just shown the adaptive raptors how to do the same themselves! (Everyone seems surprised the raptors are smart enough not to blindly walk into ambushes or hazards like moving propellers or off cliffs, let alone have any stalking cleverness.)

The story appears to continue in Jurassic Park: Raptors Attack, or in reprints in Jurassic Park Adventures: the last issue appears to have a raptor willing to give flying another shot! Like another title I picked up recently, the early issues are readily available, but the print runs slid downward and the final issues are doubtless a little more scarce. Still, I saw the cover for this one at Kalispell Comics, and passed the first time; only to have to run back for it later!

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80-Page Thursdays: Amazing Adventures!

Per the GCD this one has 84 pages; but it also calls it "Amazing Adventure," no 's,' per the indica. Well, let's go on with it anyway.
From 1988, Amazing Adventure #1, with stories by Chris Claremont, Bill Mantlo, J.M. DeMatteis, and more; and art by Michael Golden, Mike Vosburg, Rick Veitch, and more.

This issue perhaps should've picked a different title, since the adventures within are less amazing and more bleak. In the cover story from Claremont and Golden, a young woman raped and left for dead is offered the chance for revenge...or something better. Even with dragons and Golden's snazzy, Micronauts-style designs; it's a dark story. (And since this is a squarebound book, it was a pig to cram into the scanner, so that's about it for scans today.) There are two separate stories of Jews fighting oppression: a composer finds the will to fight in "Men of Peace," and a survivor confronts the leader of a massacre in "Pogrom."

A spy loses a loved one but completes his mission against Mata Hari, in Mike Vosburg's "Spies." That's the second-closest to a straight adventure story, just behind Mike Baron's history lesson "The Turtle," recounting the first use of a submarine in naval warfare, in 1776! (Baron may be taking a few liberties with the historical record!) "In the Dark Ages," about a knight in search of the Holy Grail, gets things grim again; as does the odd memoir "Ahhhh...Christmas," in which a young man spending the holidays alone receives a phone call offering him a reunion with his family, that doesn't take the turn you might expect. (Oddly, shortly after reading this issue, I was told of something similar happening, so perhaps you might!)

Certainly not a bad little issue, just not as thrilling "Yay! Adventure!" as you might expect.
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Michael Golden, John Buscema, Klaus Janson, and Bill Sienkiewicz; all on the same book.

And yet I still don't think it was ever a big seller, but not for lack of trying!

Since every so often I pull a random issue of Kull out of the quarter bins, hey, here's another with a strong creative lineup: from 1984, Marvel's Kull the Conqueror #6, "Goblin Moon" Written by Alan Zelenetz, pencils by John Buscema, inks and colors by Klaus Janson.

This struck me as a somewhat more fanciful story for this run, until I remembered the zombies and flying bull from a few issues prior. Brule the Spear-slayer is charged with guarding a nobleman's daughter, but they're on the verge of being caught out-of-doors on the "Goblin Moon." Kull hears the story from several sources, of how the goblins rise on this night and offer anyone unwise or unwary enough to be out their hearts' desire, at the cost of their soul. (My heart's desire was not to lose my soul, so I don't know how they'd work that out...) Even though Kull is a barbarian, he seems to take the goblins less seriously than the "civilized" folk and would probably write the whole thing off as superstitious nonsense; but he goes to look for Brule while everyone else apparently stays home and hides under the bed.

Of course the goblins do turn out to be real, quickly tempting the nobleman's daughter with eternal beauty, then turning her into a soulless zombie-like shell. Brule resists them, until he's tempted by a shiny new spear to kill the goblins with. ("Ha! Now I'll--oh, wait...") Kull finds the entranced pair before the goblins take them back to their Tower of Madness, and although he's tempted with "wisdom and empire" he still manages to fight the goblins until the sun comes up and drives them away. Neither Brule nor the nobleman's daughter remember anything, so Kull is left with no witnesses to the existence of goblins. Which he didn't really need, everyone believed in them already, but it would've been something.

Michael Golden did the cover for this issue, but there is also a teaser for the next issue by Bill Sienkiewicz:

I don't think Sienkiewicz did anything else for the next issue, but that's a nice piece there.
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That may be an unwise boast...

From 1984, Batman Special #1, "The Player on the Other Side" Written by Mike Barr, pencils by Michael Golden, inks by Mike DeCarlo. I was thinking of this one yesterday, and found it odd Batman only got one special, while Superman got three...

Batman faces a twisted reflection of himself, the Wrath; who has a surprisingly similar origin to Bats. On the same night Bruce Wayne's parents were killed in Crime Alley, a young beat cop named Jim Gordon is forced to shoot and kill a young boy's parents in front of him. The boy would go into the system, but was driven to master crime and get revenge--why he waited until Gordon was commissioner of Gotham City seems like bad planning. After Batman stops another attempt on Gordon, the Wrath does a little homework on his foe and figures out Batman's secret identity in short order.

The Wrath vandalizes the Wayne family's graves and beats up Alfred; while the Wrath's girlfriend tries to mobilize the city's criminals to find Jim Gordon. As Batman tracks her down, the Wrath kidnaps Leslie Thompkins to use as a hostage; forcing Batman and Gordon into a showdown. That doesn't go especially well for the Wrath, but it's weird how a lot of things from this issue would show up in later issues...of JLA. Much of the Wrath's origin is interchangeable with Prometheus, and the Waynes' corpses would be stolen in Tower of Babel.

This issue was reprinted in The Best of DC #62, digest-sized. Like this:

Tiny, but still looks great. I know the Wrath would return, in some form, in Batman Confidential, but I haven't read that one yet; and the Wrath has yet to work his way up his way up the ranks of Batman villains. Yet...

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80-Page Thursdays: Batman Family #18!

Because I'm obviously insane, I have 80-Page Thursdays written almost six months (!) in advance. So, this was written in January, and I can only hope I'm still diligently blogging away and haven't been lured away by something shiny or abducted or anything. Today, from 1978, Batman Family #18, featuring stories by Denny O'Neil, Bob Rozakis, and Paul Levitz; and art by Michael Golden, Joe Staton, Juan Ortiz, and more.

"The Monstrosity Chase!" opens with Batman gunned down by the Gargoyle Gang. Well, a Batman; an actor working security guarding an aging actress and a golden mask. That, and a brief scene of Batman saving a radio DJ from being mugged, is mostly just setup, for a rather exciting chase through the sewers--the gang took a hostage, the sewer plans are out of date, and severe flooding is coming. There's a lot going on for a 20-page story, but it comes together nicely.

Next, in "The Fine Art of Murder," Dick Grayson is snoozing through his art history class, when a student is killed by a sniper. Quickly changing to Robin--Dick apparently wears at least three layers of clothes--he catches the sniper, but someone knifes the killer to silence him. Getting the clues to a Rembrandt smuggling ring leads to some friction with Dick's love interest Lori, which appears to be setting up something for the next issue; but aside from Barbara, did Dick ever have a halfway decent girlfriend? (I know he was with Starfire for a long time in Teen Titans, but that seems to be handwaved away as a phase or something.)

Speaking of the "Dominoed Daredoll," (and man, Gail Simone needs to bring that back) the next story Batgirl defends against "Assault on the Pentagon!" Congresswoman Babs is out parking by the Potomac with Senator Tom Cleary, but before anything crosses party lines (hey-o!) she spies a commando group on the river, and has to slap Tom as fresh to excuse herself.

One of the commandos is wearing an amusingly garish skimask and scarf, but for a reason! It's Madame Zodiac, who plans on using "the largest man-made pentagram in the world!" on this night of mystical confluence or something, to give herself mighty astral powers. Like optic blasts, for instance.

When the army is gassed out of commission, Batgirl uses a dropped pistol briefly, but that seemed more to underline the uses of her utility belt then anything: she uses at least four different items from it in 12 pages. I kinda liked this one.

In "Man-Bat No More!" Kirk Langstrom mopes over his scrapbook of cases, since as a new dad, he's resigned himself to giving up super-heroing. Although he's a zoologist who created a pill to turn into Man-Bat, he's had a harder time parleying that into cash money, so he's working at a factory. His wife Francine feels bad, and thinks Kirk should go ahead and be Man-Bat, but he feels it would be too addictive and too hard to work full-time days and flap around nights.

Meanwhile, another Man-Bat is seen nights, stopping a robbery and vandalism of a school. Kirk swears it isn't him, but worries he may be sleepwalking; as he see a report that his old villain SNAFU has broken out of jail. (It was him or the Ten-Eyed Man; Man-Bat hadn't built up a deep rogues' gallery.) The...ugh..."razzle-dazzle villain" terrorizes Madison Square Garden, but as Man-Bat arrives, Kirk is home, asleep, alone...! I liked this version of Man-Bat, as solid family guy with a decent head on his shoulders; since numerous other versions make him out to be a loon or a loser, with assorted creepy personality problems as needed.

Lastly, we visit Earth-2 and the Huntress in "A Choice of Destinies." Helena Wayne's day job as a lawyer at a public interest research group, is not leaving her especially satisfied; she feels enforcing the law as the Huntress is more necessary. Costuming up, she helps save some people from a burning building, but then sees a man give a small child cash and a bomb...more so than the Man-Bat one, this reads like a chapter rather than a full story. Still, a solid, solid 80-pager here; although in retrospect I'm not sure the cover has much to do with the contents, save a reference to Gotham's sewers!
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80-Page Thursday: Batman Family #17!

It's November as I write this, but I had to schedule this week's 80-Page Thursday here: Batman Family #17, featuring stories from Bob Rozakis and Gerry Conway, and art from Jim Aparo, Don Heck, and Michael Golden.

This issue features three stories with a connecting thread: Earth-2's new heroine the Huntress visits the Earth-1 Batman. She comes seeking advice, since she had only recently taken up the cape-and-cowl, against the wishes of her father, police commissioner Bruce Wayne. Although he,and later Robin, are working a creepy kidnapping case, Batman still has time to have a chat with her, and point her in the direction of Batwoman.

Meanwhile, fortune-teller Madame Zodiac offers her "Horoscopes of Crime!" to Poison Ivy and Catwoman. They're skeptical when Zodiac tells them Batgirl will stop Ivy's latest scheme and the Huntress will break up Catwoman's next job. Zodiac tells them, double or nothing; and she's right: Congresswoman Barbara Gordon was near enough to get to Ivy as Batgirl (that's not suspicious or anything...) while Huntress is on-hand to stop Catwoman from kidnapping baseball player 'Catfish Turner.' Huntress has a hard time fighting someone who looks exactly like her dead mom; but pulls it together since this Catwoman is still "just another criminal!" Still, both escape capture with the unseen help of Zodiac, who has another plan in mind...

In their civilian identities, Batwoman and Huntress meet up with Batgirl at the carnival--the second carnival of the issue, they used to be everywhere. The ladies plan on lunch next to the museum...that Zodiac, Catwoman, and Ivy are going to rob. Zodiac wants to steal an anomalous Indian pipe: she's really excited about it, and Catwoman and Poison Ivy really don't care. After a scuffle, the criminals are caught, but Zodiac snaps her bonds, grabs the pipe, and fades away.

Huntress says her goodbyes to Batman and Batgirl in the JLA satellite, then takes the transporter back to Earth-2. But, unbeknownst to them...and fine, I'll never use 'unbeknownst' again...the transport energy and a freak interdimensional storm free the imprisoned Morgaine Le Fey. (I have a feeling that isn't the first time I've seen the JLA/JSA transports inadvertently free someone like that...) She's not wearing the armor and facemask she usually sports; but she's hellbent for revenge on Jason Blood. Teleporting to Blood's apartment, she steals back her Philosopher's Stone, regaining her power.

Meanwhile, Kirk Langstrom, better known as Man-Bat, is anxiously awaiting the birth of his first child; when he's distracted by the commotion of another birth, of a demon-child. A brief fight and the baby reverts to normal, and while the delivering doctor and Man-Bat try to explain to the cops, Blood arrives. When another demon baby appears, Blood turns into the Demon, defeats it, then uses "demon fire!" to drop the exposition on Man-Bat. Together, they stop Morgaine from maybe turning Man-Bat's baby into a monster...maybe. Kirk seemed to have been expecting a son, and got a daughter. Which I think has been retconned, as has large chunks of this issue: the Earth-2 visits, Barbara as congresswoman, maybe even Robin at Hudson U.

So why bring it up? March 14 is given as Catwoman and Poison Ivy's birthday! (And Madame Zodiac's too, no one cares.) Would've been nice if the date fell on a Thursday, but well, now you've got a week to steal them something nice.
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80-Page Thursdays: Marvel Holiday Special 1993!

For the next stretch, as long as I can find them, every Thursday we'll check out an 80-page comic! Not 64, not 100, 80-page giants only! Today we've got a book that may be 84 pages, depending on how you count it, and is cover-dated the wrong year: 199392's Marvel Holiday Special! This was the second of the ten or so Marvel's done since 1991, and not too shabby. Featuring stories from Ann Nocenti, Stan Lee, Fabian Nicieza, and more; with art by Tom Grindberg, Tom Morgan, Steve Lightle, and more. Larry Hama and Michael Golden start things out with "Zounds O' Silence!" A fun Wolverine silent story.
After a New Warriors story from Nicieza and Darick Robertson and a Spidey tale from Stan Lee and Steve Lightle; Carl Potts and Rik Levins bring us a fun Punisher short where Microchip bets Frank he can't go 48 hours without killing or hurting anyone. Then Peter David, John Hebert, and Mike DeCarlo deliver probably my favorite Doc Samson story, ever: "Revisionist History," wherein the doctor tries to tell a yeshiva class the story of Chanukah. And fails spectacularly. (It's kind of sad, though, I honestly have read more about the history of Krypton than I have about Jewish culture...)

Jim Starlin and Ron Lim revisit Thanos--the mad Titan, the death worshipper, the big bad--in "Yule Memory." Refitting an old hideout, his robots find a box of Christmas decorations and a child's doll; remnants from the childhood of Gamora, the most dangerous woman in the universe. While training her as an assassin, Thanos had still tried to raise Gamora as a normal childhood, with a birthday and holidays. And when an old foe tries to kill him, Thanos realizes how much that helped her...but that she will turn against him someday.

After an Iron Man story, the issue ends with an Ann Nocenti Daredevil piece that is nowhere near as depressing as DD's usual Christmas stories. Thank goodness. Solid issue, this one, and you should be able to find it with a little effort.

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Consider pledging, so I can get a Crys--I mean, 'Prince of Crystal' figure.

It's All True tipped me off to this: through Kickstarter.com, WorkingClassVillains are trying to raise funding for their first Backyard Legends figure, the Prince of Crystal. Any similarity to him, and a "second tier" figure line from the eighties is obviously intentional completely coincidental.

Shut up, man, don't queer the deal.

OK, we all know who this Prince is supposed to be, but can't call him that since the rights...aren't necessarily there. We'll call him a 'homage,' and anyway, the chances of a licensed revival like Masters of the Universe Classics? Not great. Like, behind Blackstar and C.O.P.S..

But, if WorkingClassVillains get this ball rolling, their next planned figure would (probably) be the Prince of Magma, the bad guy. And I'd probably get him, so I could have a version of this Michael Golden cover:

I'm pledging now, and maybe, just maybe, if Backyard Legends takes off, down the line, we could get...

Yeah, OK, the amount of fans that would want a bootleg of this fellow, would make sneaking him under the radar tough going. Ah, but even a chance...!

Art this post from Bret Blevins, Michael Golden, and Steve Ditko; for books that may or may not still be owned by somebody or another...


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It's been said before, many times, many ways, but...

The only golden rule is that Michael Golden rules.

A couple of the things I like about this one:

1. Marvel heroes really are giants. Literally. Are the civilians in the middle less than five feet tall? 'Cause if so, Iron Man and Cap are like seven feet tall. Plus!

2. Ant-man is either really close to the camera, or that ant is friggin' huge.

3. I miss the days when Conan was a de facto Marvel character. Although, it does look like She-Hulk's gonna paste him one.

4. God, the Silver Surfer looks absolutely numb there. (Above the Thing, by Spidey's foot!) Actually, most everyone looks either nonplussed or annoyed. Howard the Duck in particular looks like he's got murder on mind.

From a subscription ad in Marvel Super Special #24: The Dark Crystal. Inks by Terry Austin. Read more!

Seriously, I hadn't been sure Mr. Miracle had ever got to 25 issues before.

I mentioned this one the other day, so let's take a quick run at it: Mister Miracle #25, "Doom unto Others...!" Written by Steve Gerber, art by Mike Golden, inks by Russ Heath. Pretty good lineup there: I always think of Englehart and Rogers as being the team of note after Kirby, so I wasn't expecting this. And, some of this issue actually reflects a little on the character of Scott Free even today.

The issue opens immediately after Scott Free has made a dramatic escape at Hoover Dam, but instead of his usual showman's bow, he gives a little speech about how forces in the universe will try to bind them, but "Escape is possible!"

Watching from Apokolips, Darkseid notes that Miracle is too unpredictable and dangerous now that he's "forsworn his allegiance to New Genesis." Did anyone else ever wonder, why did Scott have any allegiance to New Genesis? Sure, it's the land of his birth, and the ostensible good guys; but they're also the ones that traded him to Apokolips in a pact. I don't feel that he owes them the time of day.

Darkseid calls in the hit on Miracle, and Granny Goodness...man, I have never been able to work past that name. Granny sends a trio of fliers out, which Miracle takes out in a suitably dramatic encore. Although it's noted a couple of times already that Scott is working up his presentation as a messiah for the people, he points out in his interior monologue that it's "strictly secular." Best guess is it's not a faith-based initiative, but almost a 'live up to your potential' thing. I personally can't imagine anything more discouraging than getting a Tony Robbins speech from Criss Angel: "I broke free from this straitjacket, so can you!" Um, I don't have laser jets in my shoes, so no, I can't. Sorry to be so negative, but there it is.

As Miracle explains to his PR guy and the reader how he escaped--which I always thought was kind of boring, since it's usually blah blah Mother Box blah blah concealed laser blah reverse phase blah blah blah--the scene shifts to a family apparently seen last issue. A young woman, Alianna, displays almost supernatural physical discipline and control, to the dismay of her father. Her mother, however, is encouraging like a coach. An East German women's gymnastics coach, but that's still sort of encouraging.

Injured ten years ago in a car wreck, and still in agony to this day, Alianna developed (over-developed, if she's supposed to be a fifteen year old as noted in the dialog) incredible inner strength. The mom encourages it, seeing her daughter as what she herself could have become if she had received the chance and not married young. The dad points out his daughter is detached and emotionless, but his argument is trumped by Granny Goodness offering the mom "advanced tutelage" for Alianna. Yeah, even though she's trained Alianna for selfish reasons, the mom had a couple of good points, and probably isn't any more harsh a trainer than Batman, but siding with Granny pokes a big hole in her argument.

Granny sics Alianna on Mr. Miracle, who at first thinks she's as strong as his wife Barda. But, he soon realizes Alianna's real strength is an instinct for pressing weakness, "like a living trap!" She also proves strong enough to take a punch in the face from Scott, and beats him. Granny appears and scolds Alianna for not killing Scott, but Alianna calmly explains that wasn't her deal, and she prefers to compete against herself.

Granny begins to strangle Alianna, explaining that she could never be one of Darkseid's warriors, since pain is too useful in motivating them: Alianna is in control of hers, she's of no further use. Scott, playing possum, gives Granny an elbow to the gut, making it two women he's slugged this issue. Fleeing slowly via boom tube, Granny says Alianna's parents are doomed since she failed, and that if Scott's going to be a messiah, there's going to be an anti-Christ coming for him eventually.

Alianna was an interesting character, or could've been anyway, but I'm not even sure she appeared in the next issue, or how many more issues Mr. Miracle ran. Scott's run for messiah was never really clarified in this issue either: I figure he was probably trying to rally Earth against Darkseid, but it was probably dropped when this series ended. I'm more used to Scott as escape artist showman/work-a-day superhero, as he was in Justice League, than either this angle or the security/locksmith position he seems to have been shoved into since Identity Crisis or so.

By the way, Big Barda barely appears in this issue, and Golden doesn't draw her as 'big' as she probably should be; but between her design and Alianna you can see elements that would show up again in Micronauts.

Man alive, it feels like that's the first actual comics post I've done in a while. I haven't read Death of the New Gods yet, although I've read most of Kirby's Mister Miracle and New Gods, and have pulled a lot of the later attempts for both out of the quarter boxes. That's not to say there aren't some good ones in there, but as far as the whole Fourth World thing goes, I could get by with just Scott, Barda, Orion, Darkseid, and maybe Kanto. What? Kanto's cool.

Anyway, I think Justice League Unlimited was on the right track in blending those characters in with the larger DC universe. Otherwise, they're out by themselves and don't have the pull for it--remember Genesis? Not if you're lucky, you don't.

Tomorrow: a non-Marvel, non-DC, non-toy post! Weird, huh? Read more!