Monday, January 22, 2024

Give a Hulk a fish...I don't know, he eats it raw, like a geek?

Still, probably easier than teaching the Hulk to fish, I suppose.
From 1976, Hulk Annual #5, "And Six Will Crush the Hulk!" Plot by Len Wein, script by Chris Claremont, pencils by Sal Buscema, inks by Jack Abel. 

I was surprised to see Claremont's name in this one, I didn't think he had written Hulk before. I was also surprised somebody cut the coupon for the Spider-Man Action Water Glove out of this ratty copy; I hope they enjoyed it! This was what I was thinking of when I had the Xemnu figure out a while ago, a greatest-hits for the Hulk, but he maybe hadn't hit some of these guys before. And he might not have hit them yet, really, since most of the monsters in this one are re-creations, duplicates of previous alien visitors to earth, created by an unseen foe with distinctive word balloons. After the usual army skirmish, Hulk has to face all comers, starting with Diablo--not the alchemist, but a ssssmack-talking sssmoke monssster with unfortunate sssibilance. He's talking out of the other side of his mouth when he realizes, oh crap, the Hulk can hurt him. Next is Taboo--not the one from Werewolf by Night, this was a big mud-monster; then Groot, the Monster from Planet X! By this point, even the Hulk has noticed they're all kind of the same?
Maybe that will help the Hulk appreciate the next one more: Goom! He's...original, you have to give him that. 
The Hulk is drained after each win, but also savvy enough to use techniques that worked for him before in these fights. On the other hand, he seemingly doesn't know the word "rain," so..."water from sky"? Really, Hulk? Next is the electricity monster Blip, which the Hulk thinks is his semi-regular foe Zzzax; before the creator of these knock-offs: Xemnu the Titan! Or, "White-Thing!"
While Xemnu drained a lot of energy from the Hulk, he also pissed him off, a lot, making him stronger than ever. After a short fight, the two wreck a dam and Xemnu is seemingly washed away, and the Hulk is left victorious. And lucky, because who wants to smell that wet fur? I bet it's awful. Anyway, while it's fun to see the old-school monsters, all the fights are the same: "Green cretin, your pathetic strength is no match for my might!" And so on, until they realize the Hulk can reach them, and does.

3 comments:

Mr. Morbid's House Of Fun said...

Funny, this sure doesn't read like a typical Claremont story, what with the glaring lack of verbosity & S&M gear being worn ;)

Oh, saw this while trying to find pics of you to put on that Googam picture:
https://www.cutbankpioneerpress.com/news/article_c728af8e-4de3-5920-bf93-02463da15079.html

DO you have a twin in Montana or is this you?

googum said...

Oh, that's my dad! He was a principal/superintendent for a bunch of years. My mom was a first grade teacher for about the same; and while my little sister and I helped out or spent time at school with them, neither of us had the slightest interest in teaching!

Mr. Morbid said...

Oh ok nice.