Not a Review: DC Multiverse Jessica Cruz and Clayface!

The first of the month, I got a surprising April Fool's: on the pegs at Target, a DC Multiverse Jessica Cruz figure! Currently upwards of $100 on Amazon, I had never seen one, so I did not think finishing Clayface was in the cards. But, since we already had the parts from Two-Face, I bought the head and pelvis pieces that came with Batwoman from eBay; then at that same aforementioned Target got Superman and the Martian Manhunter. (That Superman wasn't there when I got Jessica, for some reason.) All of which brings us to this absolute monster!

Now, I didn't love that Two-Face figure: it wasn't the design I would've preferred, and as commenter Barbeque17 pointed out, that suit body was even older than I had thought. I can't say on Batwoman, but this Manhunter is from TV's Supergirl, and like all the Multiverse TV figures, feels a little small? We may get some of the TV figures out here for a gander. Did I end up with all of Mattel's TV figures?

The Superman figure; I am going to say something a little mean. With them losing the DC license, I am so glad I'm never going to have to buy another Mattel-made Superman, because I hate their neck joints. We've got three here, and not a one of them can look up!

Conversely, going back to DC Universe Classics; I think Mattel always did a good job with Green Lanterns. (Wellll...there was that Injustice Green Lantern, I didn't go near that one with a ten-foot pole; but I don't think that design was their fault, either.) Jessica Cruz turned out very well, and in almost unheard of news, she gets accessories--besides her lantern! She also has four pieces representing green energy; I couldn't do much with the two larger ones, but still. It's a perfectly nice figure, but I can't puzzle out why she sold so much more than the rest of this series. Batwoman and Two-Face weren't even close; the Martian Manhunter was the biggest pegwarmer, if you even saw him.

If there was a particular character you were waiting for Mattel to make, this may stick in your craw a little: this is the company's third Clayface in this scale! The first was back in the DC Superheroes, pre-DCUC, and as cyclically happened with Mattel, the distribution may have been crap. In 2009, Clayface returned in a two-pack with a muddied-up Batman; I can't tell if that was a straight reissue or not. (The Batman was.) I don't have either to compare to the Collect-n-Connect, but his arms alone seem more massive than the heroes he was packed with! I thought CF may have trouble staying upright with his feet, which seem small, but so far so good. There's a swivel neck so no up-and-down motion, but also a moveable jaw, with terrible teeth inside, including another row of them!

I'm actually a little surprised, but over the past few years we've seen the Rookie, King Shark, the Justice Buster, and Dr. Psycho. But the distribution for Multiverse has been at best hit-and-miss: I've barely seen any of the Lobo or Lex Luthor waves, and like Jessica Cruz and Zoom, there's a figure in each that's far more expensive. (Batman Beyond and Vixen, respectively.) Mattel still has the DC license for the rest of the year, before McFarlane takes over; but what will actually end up coming out is anyone's guess.

Maybe Mattel should've only done the "Collect-n-Connects."
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Since a post I'm working on needs a ton more pictures, it's once again time to blog a comic within arm's reach! Let's see, today we have Marvel Team-Up #58, or Suicide Squad #28...ooh, haven't done a Squad one in a while, so from 1989, Suicide Squad #28, "Death Game" Written by Kim Yale and John Ostrander, layouts by John K. Snyder, finishes by Karl Kesel. That title has my hopes up...

...but instead of a pleasant enough little one-and-done guest-starring Ghost Rider, we've chosen to go with the fourth chapter in an eleven-issue crossover, the Janus Directive. Now, I know I was reading Manhunter at the time, but it only crossed over for one issue. (The last issue with that Doug Rice art that I loved; how he wasn't a bigger name I don't know.) The crossover would run for four issues each in Suicide Squad and Checkmate, the latter of which I've never read an issue of. It appeared to feature today's cover boy, Peacemaker. Erg, that's not a good sign.

Chased by ninjas, spies Cherie and John manage to get a call out, I believe to Sarge Steel, warning "The eggs have hatched!...the word you are looking for is anaconda." They are then beaten down and captured. Meanwhile, at Belle Reve prison, Amanda Waller would like a good goddamn answer how a Checkmate operative was able to infiltrate and nearly kill her. The explanation, it's a prison, it's supposed to keep stuff from breaking out, not in; doesn't hold a lot of water with her. Getting the Medusa Mask out of storage, Waller is about to take a squad at Checkmate, to kill Megala. I vaguely remember him from maybe the first issue of Captain Atom, in which he resembled a not-unfriendly Davros.

Two hours later, in the damaged Koning Industries building, Peacemaker is fighting it out with Major Force. The Checkmate organization's upper echelons (including Harvey Bullock!) are scrambling to perform damage control, when today's Suicide Squad shows up: Duchess, Vixen, Count Vertigo, and Shade the Changing Man! (A brief aside: the first time I saw Count Vertigo was in Legends #4, and I thought he was just a one-off created for that series! I had no idea he had appeared before, so I always expected him to get super-killed in Suicide Squad.) While Vertigo and Shade are able to bring down the unstable Peacemaker, I didn't think the lot of them would stand a chance against the Major, but Duchess is more than willing to throw down with him. Vixen countermands Waller's order to kill Megala, though: "If the Wall wants Megala dead, she can pull the trigger!" Which, yeah, I could see Vixen going through all the trouble of wheeling him down there, just for Waller to shoot him in the face right in front of her.

This part's a little unclear, since it's cutting between it and the Duchess/Major fight that Peacemaker is crawling to get into; but Vertigo seemingly has Megala captured, when the wheelchair-bound scientist explodes! Shade manages to save Vertigo, although he's injured. Vixen proclaims "Megala" as a fake; loudly, within earshot of none other than Lois Lane! Vixen gives her a terse "no comment," and while she wasn't going to give up the story, it didn't appear there was enough space here for Lane to get into it: she probably could've asked why a former Justice Leaguer was working with known criminal Count Vertigo, for one thing.

Elsewhere, General Eiling tries to call in the cavalry, Captain Atom. Who, quite refreshingly, tells him to blow: he could see on TV that Major Force was already there, and had no interest in bailing them out. Eiling is then held at gunpoint by hitwoman Black Thorn, who tells him to make a phone call. Captain Atom is somewhat concerned about Megala, when he's visited by Nightshade and King Faraday, who are likely about to drag him back into this thing kicking and screaming. Finally, we return to Cherie and John, as they are brought before Kobra! And his groupies. I can't decide if they're undermining his menace or improving his rep...

OK, one chapter out of a crossover like that is going to leave more questions than answers. I think the titular Janus Directive was supposed to be some form of oversight for meta-powered intelligence agencies, but was somehow co-opted by Kobra...then profit? I'm missing a step of plan there somewhere. That may have been a recurring theme in Suicide Squad, though: the notion of accountability and transparency, vs. Amanda Waller's "bite me and let me do my job."

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This isn't the last issue, but kind of.

Ooh, let's pretend I planned this: ten years ago tomorrow, I blogged about Warlord #10, the last issue of the 2006 reboot, and one of the worst comics I've ever read. Well, except for the art: the Phil Winslade art is so pretty, it makes you feel how much it was wasted, since the story was soooo bad. And it was a comic that tossed out the entire plot of the series just for a standalone adventure. But was that necessarily a bad thing? Today we've got the prior, penultimate issue of the series; which was all the wrap-up you were going to get: the Warlord #9, written by Bruce Jones, art by Bart Sears.

...and, flipping through this issue, I realize I had dropped the book by this point: I think I made it to #4. Rather than just a straight relaunch or revamp, Jones had tried to put a new spin on things, and there were a couple points I liked. Travis Morgan was still lost in Skartaris, but this time his fiancé Alexa and best friend Terry come after him; and Terry had an ulterior motive: trying to win Alexa for himself, or at least sleep with her. Dude seemed sketchy as hell. Also sketchy as hell--nice segue there--was Bart Sears new art direction for this series. It was less polished than his old Justice League Europe work, or than any Warlord book to date. I still wonder if it might not have gelled better with an inker.

But there was another new element that also didn't seem to catch on, and seemed a large departure from the original Mike Grell version: by this point in the series, "Travis" is gone, having been replaced by the god Cassus! The change previously seemed to be somehow affected by Alexa and Terry turning their equipment on and off, but here Cassus is in charge and seemingly beyond mortal concerns. Furious at Princess Tara's betrayal and the death of peasant girl Regine, Cassus forces them to kiss and make up, or at least switch places: Regine is resurrected and upgraded to queen, while Tara...doesn't get a line the rest of the issue, but seemingly lives to be Regine's "scullery maid." Telling Regine that Travis "has already left you," Cassus then restores the city of Shamballah to its former glory, and leaves one of his now no-longer-flying horses for her. He then sets out on a new quest: "...to find which uncaring god allowed this tragedy to unfold...and with my sword, kill him!"

Shortly thereafter, Alexa and Terry arrive in Shamballah, with their "guide," Brovis. He had been a villain earlier in the series, and while he claims "Sir Travis and I are the best of comrades!" Alexa doesn't buy it. Brovis advises Terry to land in the courtyard for maximum shock and awe, in order to convince the rubes they were gods, but Regine does not seem overly impressed. (In fact, Cassus did warn of a stranger coming to claim the throne, probably Brovis, but Regine was pretty dead when he made that speech...) Travis had mentioned Alexa to Regine, so she knows the score, and tells her Travis was gone.

Meanwhile, Cassus meets busty water goddess Lorelei, from Mt. Olyn to guide him on his quest. She then sends him along to the volcano Valken, gateway to the underworld, possible doorway to the titans, and probable trap. But although there's a "To Be Continued" there and one issue left, this plotline would never be resolved. This version of Warlord was a failure, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't the only book to fail to launch from that time. And it did get a pretty good DC Direct Warlord figure made, which isn't a terrible legacy.
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Before VR or holodecks, you had to go big or go home.

Like hijacking an entire planet, as in today's book! From 1979, Legion of Super-Heroes #256, "This is Your Life--and Death, Brainiac 5!" Written by Gerry Conway, pencils by Joe Staton, inks by Dave Hunt.

I forget exactly why Brainiac 5 was insane at the start of this one; it may have involved the reality-altering Miracle Machine. Matter-Eater Lad was also currently insane, after eating said Machine to dispose of it; but Superboy and original Legionnaires Lightning Lad, Saturn Girl, and Cosmic Boy were trying to help Brainy here. (Arguably Brainy is more useful, but M-E Lad is more fun at parties.) To try and get through the crazy, they ask nicely first, get denied, then commandeer theme-park planet Cosmic World, clearing out the paying customers and ditching the manager! ("Cosmic World" may be a bit of a misnomer or poetic license, it was more like a big floating island.) While Saturn Girl and Lightning Lad try to use telepathy and the park's holograms to work through some of Brainy's childhood traumas; Cosmic Boy and Superboy have to fight off the Science Police.

In a bad day for space capitalism all around, long-time Legion backer R.J. Brande was circling the drain towards bankruptcy. The Legion's Espionage Squad, backed with Mon-El and Shadow Lass, were investigating; but Brande is at first bellicose towards his unseen enemies and competitors, then despondent at the thought of having to rebuild his life at his age. In his defense, Brande may have been even older than he looked; and I think he would pull himself together enough to gain and lose a few more fortunes before the reboots.

Brainy is eventually cured, somehow: he realizes it's a simulation, when Saturn Girl tries to alter a childhood alienation to put a happier spin on things. (In fact, glimpses of B-5's childhood seem reminiscent of Spock's!) Great, but the Sci-Po-Po are going to throw the lot of them into Science Jail! His cure makes, I suspect, about as much sense as his insanity did. LL even mentions the illusion-casting power of Princess Projectra, but claims the holograms did an even better job. I'm just surprised we didn't see any crying little kids leaving the park; maybe kids are more emotionally stable in the 30th century. Non-Legionnaire kids, anyway...
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"Kree-Lar."

Sometime later, I know there's a more realistic version of Lockjaw coming from Mezco--note I don't say "better version," since I kinda love this one. They aren't even to the preorder stage yet, and I don't think he's being sold separately from Black Bolt.

I want to say it's a line from Skrull Kill Krew, about how the Skrulls are so unimaginative they can't be bothered to come up with a better name for their homeworld than Skrullos. Hala may be a better name, but I think it took me a long time to realize the Kree were by and large pretty awful; even if the Skrulls aren't universally evil either. While it's evil as well, how cool would it be to have a big tube of Supreme Intelligence? In-scale to Marvel Legends, it would be maybe the size of a large coffee can? I don't think my rudimentary sculpting skills could do it, even if it is lumpy and potato-shaped...

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If Norrin had seen a couple movies, he probably would've been better off.

Watching Hammer horror movies might've cut into his brooding time, though. From 1980, Fantasy Masterpieces #7, reprinting 1969's Silver Surfer #7, "The Heir of Frankenstein!" Written by Stan Lee, pencils by John Buscema, inks by Sal Buscema.

I have to dig out another reprint of this one, since per the GCD four pages are cut here. Yet it still feels a little long, since the titular heir of Frankenstein is a caricature of the usual mad scientist. He's vain and cruel, and his experiments ae less about proving anything scientific than his right as a Frankenstein. The Surfer saves him and his Igor-like assistant Borgo from the angry mob of torch-wielding villagers, even though the villagers were in the right for a change. Still, while the Surfer isn't dumb enough to be snookered by the unctuous Frankenstein; since he remembers what happened with Doctor Doom; but Frankenstein lures him back and creates a duplicate Surfer, which he sends to punish the villagers.

Borgo turns on his master, eventually pushing them both out of a window. While the Surfer is able to destroy his duplicate, the duplicate's rampage doesn't do his reputation much good. Actually, the humans already really hated and mistrusted him, it's a theme throughout the series, yeah.

The original issue was the last twenty-five cent issue of the series; the next issue the page count would drop from 40 to 20. The next issue of Fantasy Adventures would still cut maybe a couple pages from the Surfer story, but the reprints of Adam Warlock's Strange Tales would begin there.
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I have vague memories of disappointing and/or pissing off a high school friend, for not trying out for a school play; but they were doing a musical and that was well outside of my comfort zone. I did go see the play, though...and have absolutely no recollection of it, except the lead song had a chorus to the effect of, "DES-TINEEEE, AAAA-OOO-AA." It haunts me. At least Destiny no longer haunts the Sub-Mariner, not after this issue! From 1980, Tales to Astonish #7, reprinting 1968's Sub-Mariner #7, "For President--the Man Called Destiny!" Written by Roy Thomas, pencils by John Buscema, inks by Dan Adkins. TtA #7also has a striking photo-montage cover, updated from the original.

Demagogue Paul Destine is on the campaign trail, proclaiming to anyone "new left" or "far right," doesn't matter: if you're not on his side, you're a traitor. That may just be the Sub-Mariner's nightmare, since he had a bone to pick with Destine and didn't want to see him "ruler of my father's nation." Putting that aside, Namor checks in on his prisoner, Tiger Shark: Namor has to tell Tiger Shark's sister Diane that he's still alive, if cranky and insane. Lady Dorma opts to go with him, to check out this other girl; taking her air-breather pill for an hour of surface time. While a senior cop, who remembers Namor tearing up the city in the 40's, tries to stop him; Namor flies off since he won't rampage with Dorma there. But he's surprised to find Destine's campaign ads everywhere, a nightmare come true!

After Destine makes another of his hate-filled "us-or-them" speeches, a reporter wonders how a politician who seems to "hold his audience in contempt!" could be pulling in so many followers. It's easy, when you have the Helmet of Power! Which Destine does, and he doesn't even have to wear it all the time, just have it near him, in order to bend the people's will to his own. And his televised speech that evening should add to that number. Speaking with Diane, Namor notices the way her eyes glaze over as she parrots support for Destine, and realizes his plan. Rushing to the television studio, Namor smashes in, but Destine doesn't wait for Namor to attack, he takes it to him. Out of water for too long, Namor is starting to weaken; but at least he can breathe: Lady Dorma rushes to the scene as well, her skin already starting to revert to its normal blue.

And just as quickly, the fight is over; but not with Namor's usual find-water-somewhere-and-turn-the-tide. Nor were pages necessarily missing out of the fight: per the GCD pages 11 and 14 were cut for the reprint. Destine throws the beaten Namor off of a building, to his death; then discards the Helmet of Power as unnecessary. The real power was inside him, right? Um, no, not so much: attempting to levitate to his loving masses, Destine falls to his death. While he's really dead, Namor was not: his death scene was a delusion of Destine's when he was unable to beat him. Cheat!

The Helmet of Power would be retconned years later: it was really the Serpent Crown! If I recall my Marvel Saga correctly, Destine was the one that beat amnesia into Namor, leaving him to spend an indeterminate number of years as a homeless bum.
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The "Captain Marvel" tag is getting increasingly cluttered...

That tag might include any of the four Marvel Captain Marvels, and possibly Carol Danvers when she was still Ms. Marvel. It would also cover the artist currently known as Shazam, if you want to call him that or not. And now that tag includes today's book! From 1992, Action Comics Annual #4, "Living Daylights" Written by Dan Vado, pencils by Chris Wozniak, inks by Karl Altstaetter, Trevor Scott, Karl Kesel, and Steve Mitchell.

Before I even open this issue: did I read any of the Eclipso: The Darkness Within crossover? Maybe the two endcap issues. The Robin Annual, since it guest-starred Anarchy, who got jobbed so hard I had to double-check: his creator Alan Grant wrote this one, and he still lost bad. Maybe the two Batman annuals, although I don't know if I loved Sam Kieth's Joker. I might've liked to read the Justice League America annual, featuring the team's "weakest" member, Blue Beetle, vs. Eclipso. I don't think Beetle got to completely save the day; and I don't know if I like that cover. Maybe I'm just defensive for him, but it's less like the floating heads are looking on in concern, as much as they're looking down on him.

Beetle is already MIA at the start of this one; it's not revealed yet, but he's part of the science team putting together a secret weapon to defeat Eclipso, and Professor Hamilton and Lex Luthor II are grabbed as well. (LLII was the redheaded fake son of Luthor, who actually was Luthor in a cloned body.) With Eclipso controlling the town of Crater Bay, Superman is forced to surrender himself to save those people, and leaves what's left of the JLA--Booster, Fire, and Ice--to figure out how to stop him. This is an appallingly bad plan, since Eclipso doesn't release squat when he takes over Supes, but Ice had called in some help: Captain Marvel!

After a lengthy fight--and like four pages of a local resetting the timer on a solar beacon, "this thing's worse than my VCR!" The townspeople are freed, but not Superman, and he takes off. The entire town and a good chunk of the countryside are completely destroyed, though; and the agitated townsfolk don't remember a thing. Meanwhile, Superman had already had two annuals in this crossover and would get one more: the still-Eclipsed hero would fight Guy Gardner and Lobo in Adventures of Superman Annual #4. Why don't they ever use Eclipsed versions in fighting games? Seems like way less legwork to get heroes beating the tar out each other...

Am I going to Shazam this weekend? I hadn't planned on it, but maybe. I do have my Avengers: Endgame tickets already, though!
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"Perfect."

Huh, the purple of Gladiator's neck really lines up with the Skrully skullcap there: that's a happy little happenstance for you. Are Pool and Kurt walking into a trap? Yeah, they're way over their heads next time.

EDIT: This also covers a mistake I made at the end of "Throw", where "Gladiator" refers to the Squadron Supreme, and it should've been the Squadron Sinister! Man, I really want that Grandmaster figure...
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"Hyperspeed."

Fried from overtime this week, so not much commentary here. Still, another new strip tomorrow!
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