Thursday, May 20, 2010

Ah, son of a biscuit--!

Why do I have a bad feeling someone's going to try this with a paperclip today? Out today, so enjoy the deaths of Bullseye and Deadpool: Deadpool manages to block and reflect Bullseye's poison paper-clip back at him, but Bullseye somehow is still able to shoot Pool in the head. (Somehow, since Bullseye used both hands and a huuuuge rubber band to shoot said paper clip!) The end!

...oh, all right: Bullseye had an antidote to his poison, and the bullet only grazed Pool--as opposed to later issues, where he fairly routinely gets his brains blown out, decapitated, etc. Their fight turns into a demolition derby with ambulances, for another five pages, give or take a flashback and a Fast Lane insert.

(Don't remember Fast Lane? Congratulations! God, I should've dragged that one out for April 20th this year, since it's such a hamfisted antidrug piece you'd swear it was written in the 80's. Poor Gregg Schigiel does a good job on the art, but I swear, if you ever meet a stoner that's still worried about his bowl when he's about to fall like seven or eight stories...ask him what's he's got, 'cause he's got to have the good stuff.)

Anyway, Marvel doesn't seem to do this anymore, since it would be spoiled either in the solicits or the previews, or they would feel they had to hype it up; but the next time Bullseye shows up either in Deadpool or another book, it should be completely random, out of left field. Maybe even smack in the middle of another storyline: Deadpool's on issue three of five fighting the Hand or Alpha Flight or the League of Women Voters or something, when Bullseye smashes in, throwing expensive cutlery and sharpened bathroom tiles. Mayhem occurs, until Deadpool wraps it up and gets back to what he was doing...and you know, that might be a little too much like the Peter vs. Chicken fights on Family Guy. Hmm.

From Deadpool #36, "Chapter X Verse Three" Written by Christopher Priest, art by Paco Diaz and Andy Smith.

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